DH and family left me alone in a restaurant

Agreed.
You can't explain basic shit like this to people who are dragged up and know no better, they simply aren't capable of grasping it.

He's ignorant and so are his family.
That you were heavily pregnant is even worse.

Don't doubt yourself OP, yanbu.
I would be very wary of such a man.
Actions not words count.
His actions were poor, his defending them are worse.

Bet it won't be the last time he lets himself and you down.

Me too, but I’m also unsure why she had to ask the waiters as you said, I’d just have assumed they’d went outside, but also I can’t work out why she couldn’t find the car and had to go wandering round. They must have went in different vehicles and been one of those multi storey car parks.

Why do people keep commenting on the fact it was dark like women are incapable of walking anywhere when it's not broad daylight!

Recently it's been dark at 4-5pm here. I leave work in the dark, go to the supermarket / gym / friends houses in the dark... I'm not suddenly blind and unable to see my car?!

Jesus christ.

I think it depends on how far the car was, at 8 months pregnant I was still working and could easily walk out a restaurant and to the car without an escort.

They were bloody rude. I would be pissed off too, pregnant or not.
The height of bad manners and plenty of these posts reflect the demise in common courtesy in our society.

I really don’t see the issue here or why you were so confused and felt the need to ask waiters where everyone had gone. I’d think it was pretty obvious if the bill was paid and I returned to find an empty table I’d just assumed they were all outside

I would have thought with you being 8 months pregnant your DH would have waited for you outside and walked together to the car. Especially as it was dark. If it was a one-off inconsiderate moment then try to let it go. If it’s amongst many others, then yes blow your top 🤬

so they just went outside? Did they drive away and leave you?

I’m clearly going against the grain here but DH and I always wait for each other. It’s 2 minutes. Why wouldn’t you just wait and walk together?

If he just left while I was in the loo I’d be confused. It’s mean.

I don’t agree that it was normal depending on the circumstances just before you left. I am imagining that you were all sat at the table, the bills just been settled. People aren’t making moves yet, no one’s putting their coat on, you’ve said that you’ll just pop to the loo and left them chatting at the table. You’ve returned and they’ve all left, when there was no indication that they planned to leave right that second. I would have just waited for my DW, and I’d expect my parents to wait so they could say bye actually.

Different story if you went to the loo as they were all standing up putting coats on etc. as if they’d already started making moves then it would be weird for them to sit there with their coats on waiting for you, and couldn’t have been that surprising that they’d gone outside to wait

But I also would have let it go a long time ago lol

I wouldn't mind if my in laws had left if they were in a separate car and I wouldn't have minded if DH had said "we'll see you at the car" but just to vanish is a bit thoughtless.

I think it's rude. If we were still seated with you said it we would wait at the table for you. If we were already stood we might sit down again, or say we would wait by the door (inside). I definitely wouldn't walk off to the car! Some people just don't have any manners.

if this didn’t happen recently, why are you still dwelling on it! Hubby met you in his car after the meal? Really would nt bother me?!?

I'm laughing at the comments saying her DH should have phoned to let her know where they were 😂If I went to the loo in a restaurant (after the bill had been paid) and then my DH rung me to tell me they had left the restaurant and were stood outside, I'd think he'd lost the bloody plot. I think it's fairly obvious where people are going to be if they've finished the meal and are no longer sat at the table!!!

It was an inconsiderate thing to do. I'd have waited for you @TemporaryWombat .

Perhaps they're not a very considerate bunch of people, thinking mainly of themselves? Do they see you as someone not very important in their world?

Jesus, they walked ahead to the car park, they didn’t fly to the Caribbean for six weeks leaving her behind.
Why would a pregnant woman be the centre of every random activity?That sounds both stifling and nauseating.

I'm with you Op - very rude and weird! If they didn't even say goodbye especially!

This reminded me of my work Christmas night out just past...

I popped to the loo at the end of the night. A few of us did and single toilets, and I was last. I came out and not only had everyone else left the restaurant (outside smoking and saying goodbyes), but they'd also not mentioned to the staff that I was in the toilet, as I came out and found it all locked up and staff outside with them! 😆😆

We all found it funny, thankfully, but if it hadn't been at the end of a night full of laughter and fun, I can imagine maybe feeling a little different. I've had times with people where I've generally felt invisible and something like that might have been enough to upset me. I'm wondering if that might have been the case for you?

This is a husband issue not a PIL one. I think common decency would dictate that a husband/partner would wait for his wife and walk back to the car with her, whether pregnant or not. The pregnancy would highlight the need for this in my mind.

I'm not pregnant and my husband would never knowingly leave me or indeed any person who was on there own, to walk out in the dark by themselves.

Do the family smoke, could they have gone out for a smoke and moved off without realising they had not said goodbye?

Unless PILs said goodbye before you went to the loo, I would also think that is slightly strange but as a one off I would not be too concerned.

Pregnancy is always considered relevant on Mumsnet, even when it’s not in the slightest bit relevant.

Plus if anyone in the family is pregnant, they are the centre of every activity and would have been the absolute priority.

WTF?!?! 😂

I wouldnt make a big deal out of it. Meal paid for, everyone has kind of finished their meal and readying for going home. I'm just nipping to the loo type thing.

Everyone except your other half goes.

What did you expect, a standing ovation when you came back?

Your other half could be excused if he intended to warm the car up for your return and was being considerate or he just felt uncomfortable hanging around outside the toilets.

What did you want everyone to do when you walked back from your poo

Very rude. It's hardly difficult to either wait for you, or wait by the entrance, is it? How are they in general with you, OP?

Yeah, that wouldn't have bothered me at all. And I'm hypersensitive.