MOH for sister and newborn not allowed in wedding venue

I mean, she can’t really stop you!! If at the time you say you need baby there what can she do, it’s your hotel room?!

but with the level of unreasonability I would pull out. Or solely attend the ceremony then leave…

It actually sounds as though the sister spends her time reading Reddit threads - there are so many on there which go on and on about people/situations stealing attention at weddings.

I had this exact same situation with my sister last year, my LO was 6 months old though but exclusively breastfed…. We did go to the wedding and my LO ended up being unwell and sleeping in the buggy outside the venue for majority of the day anyway. But her decision to exclude my LO from the wedding entirely really tore our family apart…..and even to this date things aren’t the same.

If she is not willing to meet you halfway with your very reasonable compromise then fuck her. She sounds dreadful - what normal adult would worry about their own niece or nephew stealing the limelight? Pathetic.

This is beyond callous of your sister. 4-6 weeks is tiny. I agree with the poster that said give your apologies now. Utterly selfish, ridiculous and uncalled for putting you under this stress.

Will mum/auntie/cousin have a word.
Don’t be shy about saying bride didn’t want any babies on premises if anyone asks why not going.
Maybe karma will bite her on bum and someone with triplet babies will be staying in same hotel.

When your baby is born you wont want to leave him for any more than half an hour let alone for hours or for 1-2 days. Its just a natural feeling. Apart from leaving my DD with my partner for maybe a couple of hours here and there I couldnt leave her with anyone else until she had reached 6 months and that was only for 3 hours! Your solution was so reasonable but if your sister wont go for it then I agree you should just tell her now you cant go as you need to be there for the little one.

She said it’s her day and should be all about her and not the baby and that she’d resent me and the baby if he was on the premises.

Is she six years old?

My baby would win over this ridiculous list of demands.
Sister better find herself another MOH.
Nobody puts baby in the corner!!

Obviously she is a nutter. But you cannot be thinking straight if you are considering being apart from your baby for up to 2days. At best you will struggle with feeding it after that, worse; it will end you b/f. And that will make you feel guilty and so on. Her wedding is a day, your baby is a lifetimes commitment.

With you pg history, your little miracle is worth so much more than your terribly selfish sister.

Your sister's attitude is unbelievable!!!!

Oh- weddings used to be lovely family occasions. All those people that would love to meet your new baby won’t get to.
I don’t understand it.

Bridezilla has only two options- she either accepts your (more than) reasonable offer of the MIL+baby upstairs or you don't attend.

You can't really count on a tiny newborn being OK with Dad in an air bnb 20 minutes away. Baby might not take a bottle, might be a velcro baby, might be unwell and need mum. Babies are hard work at this age. The best option would be to have the baby with you during the wedding.

My sister has said in the past she wouldn’t want the baby to steal the limelight

There are no words.

When we got married my nephew was only two weeks old. It never crossed my mind to not want him there. I was most concerned beforehand in case he was overdue or there was some other reason to prevent my sister coming. Thankfully he arrived on time and all went well and they were both at the wedding. Of course he got a lot of attention, from me included! I can't imagine how you could contemplate having a family event like a wedding and then exclude the family's newest member.

Are your parents still alive and do they know what her stance is on this? Might your DM have a word and try to get her to accept your reasonable compromise?

I can only add to what others are saying. With a baby that young you won't want to be far away, especially if you are breastfeeding.

Will the baby be okay to be apart for 1-2 days? Will I be okay with this being 4-6 weeks PP?
No and No.
Congratulations 💐

Wow just wow she is one spoilt brat you will
not want to leave your baby let your sister have her day and enjoy your newborn snuggles

I totally agree - this is really unreasonable behaviour on the part of your sister.
You can't keep a mum from her baby for some silly ego reason. Your MIL should - at the very least - be allowed to stay with your baby in the room.
You may have to pull out and say you have to be nearby a few weeks after the birth x

Your sister is deluded. Your 'solution' was fine. I would not attend more than the quick ceremony and get back to my baby ASAP. Your sister is unreasonable.

Your sister is being pathetically fragile if she thinks a baby will steal the thunder of a bride. I understand child free weddings but if she wants her sister there then she will have to make an exception in circumstances like this..

Realistically, you can't go.

Oh well, she’ll need to get a new MOH then. What a stupid cow she is. I understand how hurtful it must be though. How could she even stop your MIL being upstairs with the baby? She can’t dictate what other guests in the hotel do. Daft bint. Jealous of a 4 - 6 week old baby, her nephew no less. Pathetic

This is a good point actually. If you DO want to go to the wedding to see family and to show off baby then do this (but don’t be maid of honor)

Your parents need to have a stern word with your sister especially if they’re financially contributing to the wedding - my mother would read me the riot act if I was a princess bridezilla like hee

My eldest baby had a tricky start to life after not breathing at birth and then wouldn’t settle without me at all and I couldn’t leave her for longer than a 5 minute toilet break without her breaking windows getting hysterical away from me. What if you have similar from your baby? Or like most mums you can’t physically leave her longer than 30 minutes because you can’t? It’s a mum thing and once they are born you often literally can’t leave them and don’t want to - completely normal as they have been attached to you for best part of a year!

That was what I expected to happen at mine. Unfortunately, the parents didn't remove the baby. (I'm assuming that they didn't want to miss a second of their elder daughter being one of my flower girls.)

I genuinely had difficulty hearing myself saying my vows.

Having said that, I wouldn't have thought to ban the baby from the wedding - just expected the mother to have a bit of sense. (The dad was one of the ushers.)