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Original poster

Teen son been a victim of a scam

387 replies

worriedmum223 · 04/01/2026 09:56

NC for this. Over the weekend my ds14 has been the victim of a sextortion scam. He was contacted on Tik Tok by someone posing as a girl who coerced him into sending nude photos. As soon as they had them they threatened to leak them to his Tik Tok contacts unless he paid money. My son did not initially tell us, but we had notifications from his bank account of him trying to access money which prompted a discussion and despite initially lying about the reason, he did eventually come clean.

I am absolutely heartbroken and shocked. He was beside himself and in tears. I’ve never seen him so shaken. I have drilled into him from a young age the dangers of social media and how you never speak to strangers and certainly never share personal information or photos. I have contacted the police and am meeting with them later today but trying to keep my son out of it for now because he is so mortified and upset.

I am worried on a number of counts.

Firstly if they do actually leak the photos which would be horrific for him. Although I’m led to believe this is rare and they are more likely to just move onto the next victim when they realise it’s a dead end.

Secondly if they try to contact him again now that they have his number and email address (all contact via Tik Tok and WhatsApp has been blocked but they could find other ways). His phone has been removed at the moment but he will need it back at some point and I can’t monitor it all the time ( when he’s at school etc).

Thirdly whether he could be in trouble himself for sending and asking for explicit photos at his age.

But mostly the emotional impact this could have on him. He was so embarrassed and upset. The fact he didn’t initially feel like he could be honest has upset me. And of course that he did this full stop. I get teenage boys have raging hormones but it’s such a stupid and out of character thing for him to do.

Please no lectures about social media. All of his friends have it, it’s part of life and I really thought I’d done a good job educating him about the dangers. If anyone else has been through this please let me know your experience and what happened next.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
usedtobeaylis · 04/01/2026 15:31

MumWifeOther · 04/01/2026 14:56

You say no lectures about social
media but really, this is a huge parenting fail on so many levels.

My son is 13 and all his friends have social media and guess what? He doesn’t.
Also, why on earth are you not checking his phone daily!??? All my kids know their phones do not belong to them and I check them to protect them.

I hope you all learn some valuable lessons.

Edited
Show quote history

What an absolute wank of a post.

Spookyspaghetti · 04/01/2026 15:30

InOverMyHead84 · 04/01/2026 10:01

This is how to do it.

Call the scumbag's bluff. Go full publicity on 'this happened, look at how scummy they are.'

There will be embarrassment, but that's to be learned from. The police will not be turning on your son, it's not in the public interest. He is the minor, he is the victim.

Show quote history

It’s completely different if the victim is a child and a pedophile has taken indecent images.

Original poster
worriedmum223 · 04/01/2026 15:30

MumWifeOther · 04/01/2026 14:58

Doesn’t happen to the kids without phones / social media and who’s parents check
their phones…..

Show quote history

Thanks for this really supportive helpful comment. I do check his phone however this whole thing happened within the space of less than 24 hours. Most kids have phones these days. It’s down to parents to educate them about the dangers. But ultimately they will make mistakes. We are all only human.

I hope your comment made you feel good and I’m sure you’re a perfect parent with faultless children.

OP posts:
Morepositivemum · 04/01/2026 15:13

Ps after the issue with my friend I drilled into my kids that if anyone asks you for a picture of anything it’s likely they could share (I told them it could be by accident but that was just to soften the blow!). I told them girls don’t particularly like seeing boys private’s as a by the way!!

lessglittermoremud · 04/01/2026 15:12

At least you were able to fairly quickly get up to speed due to his banking etc
I say to mine that nothing is ever so bad that they can’t tell me about it and by not going nuclear you have shown this to your son, that he had a big problem but you were able to stay fairly calm and try and solve it for him.
I think after the police have seen the evidence your son should come off social media etc as you say he will likely come to this conclusion himself but if he doesn’t I think you should delete them, so he can’t anxiously await them popping up anywhere.
Like you I have had numerous conversations with my similar aged children, one of them I’m pretty confident wouldn’t send anything (ASD and very conscious of rules) but our middle one can be a loose canon and thinks he knows best. For this reason neither of mine have TikTok, snap chat etc
Parenting is a fine line between keeping your child safe but not making them so different to their peers that they are ostracised, I’m super lucky that within my children’s friendship groups other than WhatsApp parents seem to have a similar mindset to ours. It’s very different if your teen is surrounded by friends that are allowed it and at some point you do have to be able to trust that they’ve listened to advise you’ve given.

ButFirstCovfefe · 04/01/2026 15:04

This happened to my son.
I actually got a call from the police (online crimes) as he was so scared he contacted them and asked them to tell me.
In addition to explicit photos, he’d sent gift cards and had told the scammers what school he went to and (innocent) pictures of his siblings, names etc.
The police came out to take a statement. He was told repeatedly that he was a victim. It’s a scarily prevalent crime. This person/people will likely be living in Africa and this is their “job”.
We obviously also had to talk to the school, who were incredibly supportive.
The pictures never got released, thankfully, and 3 years later it’s a long forgotten nightmare. I promise you he’ll have learned from this and will hopefully never be so reckless again.

Purpl · 04/01/2026 14:59

Id defo change the phone number and email address. Also look at snapchat insta and any other accounts as they often use very similar user names and change them too. So sad this is happening. If they are leaked prepare him to say something to save face like yeah its been hacked and its an ai photo.
also he should put a message on hos docial media with that petson user name saying warning scammer or padeo or something. They get their bext victims by scrolling his contact list. Poor boy.

godmum56 · 04/01/2026 14:58

Dissappearedupmyownarse · 04/01/2026 14:48

I'm so sorry for you son. I'm sure you've provided endless reassurance for him.
Well done for contacting the police. Follow their guidance.
I'm 99.9% sure the scammed won't leak them and like everyone else is saying, they will move onto the next victim. If and the is a very big IF, in the unlikely event they were leaked, just tell everyone they're AI generated and your son didn't pose for them, they've simply taken some of his profile picks and superimposed them via AI onto a naked body to blackmail him for money. Everyone now knows that this is perfectly plausible explanation and your son can hopefully move on xx

I can vouch for that. The "heads on other naked bodies" thing was done to friends of mine some 10 years ago using photoshop and its even easier now.

MumWifeOther · 04/01/2026 14:58

Trepidfox · 04/01/2026 14:10

Be kind to yourself OP, you have not failed in the slighest. Your child was targeted by criminals and made an error in judgement, it could happen to anyone of us 💐

Show quote history

Doesn’t happen to the kids without phones / social media and who’s parents check
their phones…..

MumWifeOther · 04/01/2026 14:56

worriedmum223 · 04/01/2026 09:56

NC for this. Over the weekend my ds14 has been the victim of a sextortion scam. He was contacted on Tik Tok by someone posing as a girl who coerced him into sending nude photos. As soon as they had them they threatened to leak them to his Tik Tok contacts unless he paid money. My son did not initially tell us, but we had notifications from his bank account of him trying to access money which prompted a discussion and despite initially lying about the reason, he did eventually come clean.

I am absolutely heartbroken and shocked. He was beside himself and in tears. I’ve never seen him so shaken. I have drilled into him from a young age the dangers of social media and how you never speak to strangers and certainly never share personal information or photos. I have contacted the police and am meeting with them later today but trying to keep my son out of it for now because he is so mortified and upset.

I am worried on a number of counts.

Firstly if they do actually leak the photos which would be horrific for him. Although I’m led to believe this is rare and they are more likely to just move onto the next victim when they realise it’s a dead end.

Secondly if they try to contact him again now that they have his number and email address (all contact via Tik Tok and WhatsApp has been blocked but they could find other ways). His phone has been removed at the moment but he will need it back at some point and I can’t monitor it all the time ( when he’s at school etc).

Thirdly whether he could be in trouble himself for sending and asking for explicit photos at his age.

But mostly the emotional impact this could have on him. He was so embarrassed and upset. The fact he didn’t initially feel like he could be honest has upset me. And of course that he did this full stop. I get teenage boys have raging hormones but it’s such a stupid and out of character thing for him to do.

Please no lectures about social media. All of his friends have it, it’s part of life and I really thought I’d done a good job educating him about the dangers. If anyone else has been through this please let me know your experience and what happened next.

You say no lectures about social
media but really, this is a huge parenting fail on so many levels.

My son is 13 and all his friends have social media and guess what? He doesn’t.
Also, why on earth are you not checking his phone daily!??? All my kids know their phones do not belong to them and I check them to protect them.

I hope you all learn some valuable lessons.

Perrylobster · 04/01/2026 14:56

How awful for you all. I hope he feels better about everything soon. It happens to so many young men, he’s not alone.

Alovelyhotbath · 04/01/2026 14:54

TeaRoseTallulah · 04/01/2026 09:58

You need to contact the police.

For goodness sake. At least read the post if you are going to reply.

Dissappearedupmyownarse · 04/01/2026 14:48

I'm so sorry for you son. I'm sure you've provided endless reassurance for him.
Well done for contacting the police. Follow their guidance.
I'm 99.9% sure the scammed won't leak them and like everyone else is saying, they will move onto the next victim. If and the is a very big IF, in the unlikely event they were leaked, just tell everyone they're AI generated and your son didn't pose for them, they've simply taken some of his profile picks and superimposed them via AI onto a naked body to blackmail him for money. Everyone now knows that this is perfectly plausible explanation and your son can hopefully move on xx

Maray1967 · 04/01/2026 14:45

MeouwKing · 04/01/2026 14:36

The Aussies are right to ban social media to under 16s

I agree with that. We thought ours was sensible at 14 - evidently we were wrong.

MeouwKing · 04/01/2026 14:36

The Aussies are right to ban social media to under 16s

ByWisePanda · 04/01/2026 14:34

MissJoGrant · 04/01/2026 14:31

Not sending nude pictures over the Internet.
Not trusting strangers online.

These things are spoken about in schools all the time.

Show quote history

I don't think it's covered as much as you think in secondary schools. It might get a mention in PSHE that lesson covers a variety of current issues. He might have been away with the fairies in that lesson when it was spoken about.

MissJoGrant · 04/01/2026 14:31

NessShaness · 04/01/2026 13:30

Is it? Not in my son’s secondary school so maybe it’s not nationwide.

He has never heard of this scam before we just spoke about it.

Show quote history

Not sending nude pictures over the Internet.
Not trusting strangers online.

These things are spoken about in schools all the time.

Thereisalight4 · 04/01/2026 14:30

Lots of police forces have specialised units for this kind of thing - it’s sadly common - also I would highly advise telling the safeguarding team at his school - they are likely to have come across this before and can give your son some extra support

Plinketyplonks · 04/01/2026 14:27

A friend who teaches told me recently about this happening to two boys at her school. She’s in safeguarding. She said in both cases they self reported to CEOPS who were hugely helpful. Sorry someone may already have mentioned and I’m a bit foggy on what they do (my kids are much younger) but I just remember that bit of what she told me.

pigmygoatsinjumpers · 04/01/2026 14:27

TeaRoseTallulah · 04/01/2026 09:58

You need to contact the police.

You need to read the post:

OP's first post:

"I have contacted the police and am meeting with them later today..."

PolyVagalNerve · 04/01/2026 14:26

worriedmum223 · 04/01/2026 12:44

I am so grateful for the supportive comments and helpful advice. I have really been beating myself up about this.

I knew there would be some posters who’d derail the thread with lectures about social media. Some can’t resist the opportunity to prove what a superior parent they are. It’s really difficult to ban your kids from having something all of their friends use and communicate on. My parenting style has never to been blanket ban anything but allow it in sensible ways (ie with restrictions) and try my best to instil enough common sense and education within them to know how to do these things responsibly and safely.

On this occasion that approach has clearly failed but it doesn’t mean I will change my whole approach. I will of course be keeping a much closer eye and I also think my son will choose to get rid of Tik Tok himself.

All I care about is keeping him safe emotionally and practically going forwards.

you sound a really fab, level headed mum, your DS is lucky to have u - give him a huge hug - he’s not the first and won’t be the last and he will come through the other side

BarMonaco · 04/01/2026 14:22

I can't criticise re social media as I let my now young adult dc use it when your son's age. I don't know anyone who didn't

Kippergodzillar · 04/01/2026 14:21

This happened to my son age 11 we contacted the police and after a year or so the man was arrested and charged with multiple child secual offences
he’s serving 22 years in prison
it took a long time but we are so glad we reported it
my son is now 17 and he’s absolutely fine and if it’s reassures you the perpetrator was pathetic and only 22 and just a horrible human being - if I can help at all please message me - it’s a long time ago now but it hasn’t been as devastating as I first thought and it was exactly the same scenario that you describe here

ilovesushi · 04/01/2026 14:20

CustardySergeant · 04/01/2026 14:07

She has called the police. It's in the first post!

Show quote history

My reading comprehension is clearly lacking today.

BePoisedPlumUser · 04/01/2026 14:19

This happened to someone I know. He needs to just ignore it and they will get bored and go away.

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