Teen son been a victim of a scam

If photos are leaked go with the ‘it’s obviously been done with AI’ line.

Sorry no experience with this, but just to say he is the victim here, as you say, only 14, young and vunerable, and sure thats how the police will see it. So glad he told you. Keep telling him how glad you are he told you, and you will get through this together. X

OP
Speak with and cooperate with the police, disconnect the internet to ensure your son's safety, and be there to protect and care for him at all times.

After seeing some replies in this thread, I don’t blame those who turn to AI for conversation and solutions to their problems.

Of course, there are always people quick to harshly judge and even wish the boy the worst possible outcomes. The victim already knows he’s made mistakes and has learned that some people don’t want him alive or at peace. He’s dealing with the consequences, while the real criminals walk free, making millions, and receiving support from people everywhere who keep blaming the victims.

I am so sorry that you and your son are going through this.

We had a very similar situation with someone we know well. The scammers were relentless for a couple of days, even though there was no response from the victim after the initial messages.

After a couple of days, the scammers sent through a screenshot which purported to show a message sent from the victims TikTok to one of their contacts. The content included the indecent photo and vile words from the scammer ridiculing the victim. This screenshot was fake - but made to look like it was legit to increase the threat of releasing it further. So please be mindful that if the scammer sends ‘proof’ that they are serious in their threat, it’s not always the case that it has actually been done.

The advice we received was to check their iCloud account as that’s how the scammers gained access to all their personal info and SM accounts. We went into the Apple Store and they were very good at helping.

In the situation we were involved with, the child got a new phone, phone number and SM accounts to take the stress off them and the old phone was turned off. Eventually the communication ceased, but it went on for over a week.

You are very welcome to DM me if you have any questions.

It is reassuring that he was able to tell you.

This was a boy at my son's school
https://www.maidenhead-advertiser.co.uk/news/windsor/73927/Teenager-hanged-himself-after-receiving-internet.html

The OP thought she had. That's the point.

Speak to the school as well. I work at a boarding school and this is so common but the school will work with you to offer him support.

We do regular PHSEE lessons on social media and nudes, they all roll their eyes and say they know but then they do keep falling for scams. Not because they are daft/ stupid but because it is really easy to fall into them.

Why why why do people send these pics in this day and age with all the bad stuff around it being highlighted! Even if you are madly in love and know them well - things change! Drum it into your vulnerable kids!

The U.K. may ban social media for under 16s sooner than you think. A lot of European counties are following suit. France is now on the case.

www.theguardian.com/world/2025/dec/31/france-plans-social-media-ban-for-under-15s-from-september-2026

Nope doesn’t make me feel good, my niece is cutting as a result of continued exposure to rubbish algorithms

some of us reacting to this due to the “his friends have it so part of life “ comment

you can’t educate them or protect them if you’re exposing them to something you can’t see yourself

I agree. I've posted a few times that I've learned that it's much easier to just say no in the first place than it is to roll back anything you've allowed, even with conditions and qualifications. Some parents struggle with it and one of the reasons is that, far from it being purely and simply a parenting failure, we've got an over-reliance on 'educating' children. They're absolutely overloaded with things they shouldn't be and then we expect them to make good decisions way out of the scope of the developmental stage. Sometimes we just need to simply protect children. So I would support banning, to protect children, reduce the pressure on parents, and reverse the idea that education solves everything.

I’m not waiting for the UK to ban socials.

I’m off them and my kids are not getting access until they are 16 and maybe older if I educate them and model behaviour well enough for them.

yes they gnash their teeth at me and wail occasionally but they all have healthy friendships, good connections in local sports and activity clubs and happy lives and I know they are safe from all the risks that we all know.

Amazing helpful comment. The OP is so lucky you chose to post this.

I hope the U.K. follows Australia and bans under 16s from socials. The world would be a better place.

@worriedmum223 sorry you and your son are going through this. There have been many cases lately where young teens have taken their own lives due to the panic caused by people sextorting them. It’s horrendous.

It’s so fortunate that you received a notification from the bank and you were able to find out about this. Otherwise your son would be dealing with this on his own and who knows what the outcome could have been.

I have no doubt that your son will have learned his lesson, especially seeing as the police will be involved and will take it seriously. Not only
have they sextorted him but it’s likely someone over the age of 18, who knew he was a minor and was asking for indecent photographs of him. They will hopefully be able to trace the perpetrator through their IP address, phone number linked to tiktok account and bank details.

By your son coming clean / you finding out it’s hopefully saved others from falling victim to the perpetrator of this.

Hope you’re both ok OP.

I have drilled into him from a young age the dangers of social media

whilst allowing the brain melting, info stealing app that is TikTok?

OP

Work closely with the police and encourage them to stay committed, while always being there for your son. Be a strong, supportive, and positive influence in his life.

For his peace of mind, it might help to completely cut off internet access on all devices and ensure messaging apps are closely monitored by responsible adults. It could also be great to get him involved in activities he enjoys to help distract him from all this chaos.

I hope and wish the best outcomes for you all.

Because he was allowed to use social media. If he hadn’t been on tictok would he have been available to criminals?

boys this age are incredibly vulnerable as PP has said and they need to be protected by us their parents.

i feel huge sympathy for OP. We have had horrid experiences with our son searching for and accessing very disturbing content on utube - he was curious no shame there, his search was relatively harmless but utube showed him progressively more disturbing content to pull him down a rabbit hole based on algorithms…we thought we’d educated him and had the right safe guards on the pc but still we didn’t get it right so I’m deeply sympathetic.

but we have the power to keep our kids out of the grasp of these sophisticated criminals.

watch the social dilemma on Netflix it is mind blowing

It's a lesson learned. If whoever it was did share those pics then they'd making CSA images which is a much more serious matter for them. So I'd say it's just a threat.

But hammer home if you send strangers, or even friends nudes then you're sending it to the whole Internet.

It's ok if he's embarrassed and mortified because it means he's unlikely to do it again. I know it's upsetting for you as his mum. Just be supportive.

This is part of the reason why Australia has banned social media for people aged under 16.

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/britain-social-media-ban-teenagers-australia-jonathan-hall-b2893927.html

Oh poor kid, this is my absolute nightmare with teenage sons having read the stories about suicides!

You sound like you're doing all the right things, I would definitely delete tiktok and any social media.

I would also just keep reassuring him that they likely will never release the photos, but even if they do - it doesn't matter. It will be an awful cringey experience but it will blow over and everyone has awful cringey experiences at 14. He won't be the first or last kid to have this happen.
If it was my own son, I would tell him the most important thing is he is safe, and we would do anything we needed to to keep him safe whether that is moving school, a fresh start somewhere else, whatever.

OP doesn’t identify this as a mistake

I agree. Apparently it’s now quite easy to fake nude pictures of real people anyway, so these scams must be losing credibility.

Please ignore all stupid moralising comments, OP. I’m old, but I can still remember how naive and trusting I was in my teens! Also, the sheer horror of being humiliated or embarrassed at that age. I hope DS soon gets over this.

Please tell your son he is one of thousands and is not alone. These scammers target people day in, day out.

It’s such an awful scam because it relies on instilling extreme shame and anxiety in victims, which has led to young people taking their own lives.

The police guidance on this is very clear, your son is and should be treated as a victim.

www.ceopeducation.co.uk/parents/articles/online-blackmail

I agree, please please OP don’t be too harsh on your son right now.

I’ve heard far too many stories of young men killing themselves over stuff like this, as they think their lives are over and can’t live with the shame.

You need to reassure him that he will get over this, and life goes on.