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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think housing in this country is fundamentally broken?

432 replies

BrokenHousingLogic · 15/12/2025 15:25

Whether you rent privately, rent socially or own, it feels like the system isn’t really working for anyone.

• Rents are high and insecure
• Buying is out of reach for many
• Social housing is under strain
• Landlords and tenants feel pitted against each other
• Local authorities seem overwhelmed

It often feels like people are arguing with each other instead of addressing the fact that the whole structure is failing.

AIBU to think this goes beyond individual choices and points to a system-wide problem?

OP posts:
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5
CraftyGin · 27/12/2025 19:27

JenniferBooth · 27/12/2025 19:26

Misogyny alert

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Define the problem before trying to solve it. You don't get many men holding the baby, do you (androgyny alert).

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 19:27

CraftyGin · 27/12/2025 19:26

It's thought to contribute around 20% - not the biggest factor, but significant nonetheless.

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Proof?

CraftyGin · 27/12/2025 19:26

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 19:24

Again, post proof to back up your claim that couples living apart is causing the housing crisis.
I will wait.

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It's thought to contribute around 20% - not the biggest factor, but significant nonetheless.

JenniferBooth · 27/12/2025 19:26

CraftyGin · 27/12/2025 18:43

A lot of women have several partners, so that is a big housing requirement over a monogamous couple.

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Misogyny alert

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 19:24

Balletpoint · 27/12/2025 19:23

The issue isn't if you have a partner but if you expect the tax payer to bail you out thus adding to the housing crisis.

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Again, post proof to back up your claim that couples living apart is causing the housing crisis.
I will wait.

Balletpoint · 27/12/2025 19:23

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 19:18

And we have another poster saying you need to be at least 99% before you live with someone other wise it is the woman's fault if it goes wrong. It seems no one can make their mind up.

There have been threads on here asking what things you would never do again. A lot of women say they would never live with a man again. I am one of them. Been there a few times, got a few T-shirts. But yes, us fickle women are now to blame for the housing crisis.

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The issue isn't if you have a partner but if you expect the tax payer to bail you out thus adding to the housing crisis.

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 19:22

Balletpoint · 27/12/2025 19:21

Couples don't have to live together. But expect to fund your own lifestyle.

The housing crisis is caused by too many people expecting the tax payer to fund their living arrangements.

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Do you have proof for that last statement? Your claim that there is a housing shortage because of people claiming housing benefit seems very bold.

Balletpoint · 27/12/2025 19:21

Alexandra2001 · 27/12/2025 19:15

Thats utterly laughable...

So everyone in a relationship should live together?? do you not see how ridiculous you are being.

The housing crisis is caused by governments not building enough houses, selling off stock and stupid immigration policies, usually with zero enforcement.

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Couples don't have to live together. But expect to fund your own lifestyle.

The housing crisis is caused by too many people expecting the tax payer to fund their living arrangements.

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 19:18

Alexandra2001 · 27/12/2025 19:15

Thats utterly laughable...

So everyone in a relationship should live together?? do you not see how ridiculous you are being.

The housing crisis is caused by governments not building enough houses, selling off stock and stupid immigration policies, usually with zero enforcement.

Show quote history

And we have another poster saying you need to be at least 99% before you live with someone other wise it is the woman's fault if it goes wrong. It seems no one can make their mind up.

There have been threads on here asking what things you would never do again. A lot of women say they would never live with a man again. I am one of them. Been there a few times, got a few T-shirts. But yes, us fickle women are now to blame for the housing crisis.

Alexandra2001 · 27/12/2025 19:15

OhDear111 · 27/12/2025 19:08

@XenoBitch You describe yourself as partners but require 2 homes. What if everyone did that? You can see how housing shortages arise! Usually couples live together in one home. You want 2 homes. Hence shortages of accommodation and high rents. You are causing it - partly. It’s too high demand for the housing stock available.

Thats utterly laughable...

So everyone in a relationship should live together?? do you not see how ridiculous you are being.

The housing crisis is caused by governments not building enough houses, selling off stock and stupid immigration policies, usually with zero enforcement.

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 19:14

Balletpoint · 27/12/2025 19:08

What it says. If you pay your own way, good on you.

No one should expect tax payer help because of their lifestyle choices.

Edited
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My DP rents privately, and I do not rent at all. So none of "your" money is paying for our housing.

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 19:13

OhDear111 · 27/12/2025 19:08

@XenoBitch You describe yourself as partners but require 2 homes. What if everyone did that? You can see how housing shortages arise! Usually couples live together in one home. You want 2 homes. Hence shortages of accommodation and high rents. You are causing it - partly. It’s too high demand for the housing stock available.

And? Not everyone wants to live together. I don't even rent.
So I am blamed for not picking the right partner when one cheated on me, and now my new one and me is to blame for the housing crisis.
Maybe look to the government, and not people just trying to live the best way they can.
Stop fucking punching down.

OhDear111 · 27/12/2025 19:08

@XenoBitch You describe yourself as partners but require 2 homes. What if everyone did that? You can see how housing shortages arise! Usually couples live together in one home. You want 2 homes. Hence shortages of accommodation and high rents. You are causing it - partly. It’s too high demand for the housing stock available.

Balletpoint · 27/12/2025 19:08

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 19:03

What is that meant to mean?

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What it says. If you pay your own way, good on you.

No one should expect tax payer help because of their lifestyle choices.

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 19:03

Balletpoint · 27/12/2025 19:01

Great, as long as you fund your living arrangements.

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What is that meant to mean?

Balletpoint · 27/12/2025 19:01

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 18:54

We don't want to live together. I have done that before. We are happy with our living arrangement, thanks.

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Great, as long as you fund your living arrangements.

Balletpoint · 27/12/2025 19:00

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 18:44

Ha, so the housing crisis is down to women sleeping around. Nice.

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It is true if they expect the tax payer to fund their living arrangements.

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 18:56

SpikeGilesSandwich · 27/12/2025 18:47

Even if you own a home outright, you are taxed like hell and if you don’t have a decent income, maintenance and repairs are a killer.

Yes, I see some very run down houses. Very overgrown gardens, single glazing etc. Often an elderly person living alone downstairs who is struggling to cope.

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 18:54

OhDear111 · 27/12/2025 18:52

@XenoBitch That’s supply and demand in action isn’t it. Why isn’t your DP with you in one dwelling? Then he wouldn’t need anywhere else.

We don't want to live together. I have done that before. We are happy with our living arrangement, thanks.

OhDear111 · 27/12/2025 18:52

@XenoBitch That’s supply and demand in action isn’t it. Why isn’t your DP with you in one dwelling? Then he wouldn’t need anywhere else.

CraftyGin · 27/12/2025 18:48

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 18:44

Ha, so the housing crisis is down to women sleeping around. Nice.

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Yes, partly.

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 18:47

OhDear111 · 27/12/2025 18:42

@XenoBitch That requirement significantly adds to housing shortages and too many people wanting family housing and costs going up. It’s supply and demand.

It took my DP months to get a flat after he was served his notice. The first one available to him was a 2 bed place. He needed a roof over his head, and he can afford the rent (just). Over 30 people viewed that place, and that was the same for all the places he viewed before that too.

SpikeGilesSandwich · 27/12/2025 18:47

Even if you own a home outright, you are taxed like hell and if you don’t have a decent income, maintenance and repairs are a killer.

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 18:44

CraftyGin · 27/12/2025 18:43

A lot of women have several partners, so that is a big housing requirement over a monogamous couple.

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Ha, so the housing crisis is down to women sleeping around. Nice.

CraftyGin · 27/12/2025 18:43

XenoBitch · 27/12/2025 18:40

Well, if there are children involved then it makes sense to have room for them in each home too.

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A lot of women have several partners, so that is a big housing requirement over a monogamous couple.