To think the problem with wealth inequality is that rich people don't know how rich they are?

We arrive in the hotel room and he sets up his screens! But he isn’t working all day he just checks on stuff every so often

Why? I love them regardless. They know that. We are all mature enough to know that we can’t agree on everything. I told my youngest son that if he voted Labour instead of the SNP, he should never darken my door again. He just laughed and said “ see you tomorrow mum, after I’ve voted Labour” 🤣

Fingers crossed your adults kids have identical stance as you

heaven help them if not

What are holidays like for him?

Thank you! you guys sound like lovely parents!

So they get a couple of hours?

Thank you. Despite our differences, I actually like you. We’re just different 😊

He will never not work I think. But there’s a lot he can do for himself or even a couple of days a month/week - when he’s really old that is!

My point was - how on earth will he cope without work??

he definitely puts DC first. He plays with DC all weekend minus an hour or so to go for a run. When we do move it will be for DC’s schooling because I’m not sure they are as academic here certainly at later levels so that and that alone will dictate where we live for a good ten years. All the money he makes is for our family - DC won’t have to work for money but will be free to work for enjoyment. (Obviously work is a good in itself)

But it’s so normal to us and literally everyone we know. It’s so interesting that you think it’s bizarre. I guess all our lives become echo chambers to an extent. I love seeing the completely different perspectives on Mumsnet.

I don’t know if it’s a class thing - I would say I’m middle class but my father is more on the right wing side. He thinks people should only have as many children as they can afford to educate (privately). He is a little nuts 🤣 But certainly for him and his colleagues you just really saw your kids to give them a goodnight kiss during the week.

I agree that the relationship between the parents is the most important thing though - kids just want a loving stable home. That’s so lovely your son said he wants just what you have!

Am I shaming them? Good. My children were, and still are, far more important to me and their dad the money

They’re 14 & 16. They’re usually still awake at 8pm when I get home.

Oh, please.
Stop shaming people for having competence and ambition. Many busy, successful women raise happy and healthy children. She’s a lot better role model for them, too.

My point was - how on earth will he cope without work??

No. I can never understand people who have children and leave them all day with strangers. So I won't stop. The children didn't ask to be born to parents who care more about their work than they do about them. It's not about women. It's about two selfish people who, for some mad reason, decided to have children then completely let other people raise them because they love their work more.

The competent people can strike a balance, but always put the children, who didn't just materialise, first.

Striking how you missed fathers completely out of your post btw. Are the "successful" women doing it all on their own?

No. I can never understand people who have children and leave them all day with strangers. So I won't stop. The children didn't ask to be born to parents who care more about their work than they do about them. It's not about women. It's about two selfish people who, for some mad reason, decided to have children then completely let other people raise them because they love their work more.

The competent people can strike a balance, but always put the children, who didn't just materialise, first.

Striking how you missed fathers completely out of your post btw. Are the "successful" women doing it all on their own?

Genuinely how much do working parents see their kids per week?

what do you think is normal?

I’m a SAHM now so do drop off at 8 and pick up at 2.30pm, 11.30am pick up on Fridays so obviously I see DC a lot.

Oh, please.
Stop shaming people for having competence and ambition. Many busy, successful women raise happy and healthy children. She’s a lot better role model for them, too.

In the last year I actually earned just shy of £150k gross due to maternity leave. My total compensation (i.e. base + bonuses) is on paper around £200k, and job expectations are therefore set "for" that salary, if that gives you a reference point. Our juniors on £50-100k work those hours too though.

FYI: "9a-10p" includes lunch and dinner breaks, taken as you need them - some people go to the gym after dinner etc, I so in practice it's probably fair to call it 10h of actual work. I know some industries only count paid hours. We don't have precise working hours so can't exactly say what is an "unpaid lunch" etc. My personal hours as a manager are very variable and I don't have a "standard day" as much as the juniors do.

As I'm female and the breadwinner I can't see myself doing this for another 20 years. There is potentially a path for me where I could do the consulting version of my job (maybe on one of those zero hours contracts upthread!) which would be very appealing 5 years from now and allow me to still earn well but be able to pick my kids up at the school gate. After the nursery years, when I will also have paid off the private student loans I took to get this salary, this will likely be a plausible option for me both financially and career-wise. I am really hoping the timing of this works out.

In the last year I actually earned just shy of £150k gross due to maternity leave. My total compensation (i.e. base + bonuses) is on paper around £200k, and job expectations are therefore set "for" that salary, if that gives you a reference point. Our juniors on £50-100k work those hours too though.

FYI: "9a-10p" includes lunch and dinner breaks, taken as you need them - some people go to the gym after dinner etc, I so in practice it's probably fair to call it 10h of actual work. I know some industries only count paid hours. We don't have precise working hours so can't exactly say what is an "unpaid lunch" etc. My personal hours as a manager are very variable and I don't have a "standard day" as much as the juniors do.

As I'm female and the breadwinner I can't see myself doing this for another 20 years. There is potentially a path for me where I could do the consulting version of my job (maybe on one of those zero hours contracts upthread!) which would be very appealing 5 years from now and allow me to still earn well but be able to pick my kids up at the school gate. After the nursery years, when I will also have paid off the private student loans I took to get this salary, this will likely be a plausible option for me both financially and career-wise. I am really hoping the timing of this works out.