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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To consider Only Fans

534 replies

Daydreamnotbeliever · 15/11/2025 10:44

So for background im a single parent of 3. 2 uni age kids, one older but has additional needs. All 3 live with me still. Im supporting all 3 more or less full. Their father is no contact and has been for over a decade.

I work full time and earn a salary of £40k. Which on paper is ok. In reality, more or less funding 4 adults, not so much. The kids contribute what they can. They pay for their own items. My eldest works part time which is about as much as he can manage. But its not enough. My wage doesnt stretch far enough. I run out of money every month. Theres rent bills heating food etc all falls on me and i cant survive. Theres no luxuries. No fun. No anything. When they move out ill manage but at the minute its impossible. And i cant expect them to contribute more. The eldest doesnt have the capacity and the other two need uni to be the priority they are both doing courses that are intense and do a lot of work outside of lectures.

Im single. However. I have a friend who i hook up with. Its safe. Hes safe. But i have no desire to live with someone and share a life. We date, kinda, go out for drinks sometimes or the cinema, hook up, and have fun.

The idea is he manages an account i make. He makes vids, edits, promotes, markets etc. I do the chats, conversations etc in the eve. We split anything earned, more to me. My suggestion not his. All my idea.

i know its not guaranteed money, infact the opposite, it takes a lot of effort to make something. He has the time to market etc. i dont. It would be faceless. I wouldnt put my face out there. But pretty much anything else goes.

I just cant manage at the minute. Earning more in my role is impossible at the moment. Theres no second jobs i can do. No local bar work. I dont drive. I have no “talents” for an etsy side hustle. I dont have the money to buy equipment to start a printing side hustle or something. I dont have the time for much around my job at the moment. Theres just not other way to make money. Im out of idea and i need to make a few hundred a month to keep my head above water now im funding 4 adults alone pretty much.

The concern is obviously my kids, even though they are all adults. We are a pretty liberal open family and discuss anything and everything. Id probably tell them, but its still a worry.

Would you do it? Could you do it? Have you done it? Can you suggest an alternative?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
DonnyBurrito · 17/11/2025 13:32

I agree with everyone who has said this is a bad idea and you aren't going to make any money. Just don't do it. If one of your kids friends find out they will rip the absolute piss out of them. 1. That their mum is on OF in the first place, and 2. That she has zero subscribers and/or extremely cheap content.

I'm sure the two uni students would rather get Saturday jobs than know their mum is trying to flog homemade porn on the internet.

Treylime · 17/11/2025 13:19

Usernamenotav · 17/11/2025 11:43

'Get a higher paying job'
That's literally what she's trying to do. OnlyFans is a job.

Its not a job its sexwork

Cucy · 17/11/2025 11:57

The posters telling OP to get a higher paying job aren’t helping - everyone would do that else.

OP is earning above average already and it likely also fits around her lifestyle.

OF is not worth it unless you are very unique and willing to put the hours in.
You have to have your face on camera too.

Better suggestions would be sure hustles that OP can do to make extra money in the evenings.

Holluschickie · 17/11/2025 11:51

Usernamenotav · 17/11/2025 11:43

'Get a higher paying job'
That's literally what she's trying to do. OnlyFans is a job.

Its not concievable that a 40 yr old mum of 3 will earn anything off Only Fans.

Usernamenotav · 17/11/2025 11:43

MyAmusedOpalCrab · 15/11/2025 10:56

Then change sectors and get a higher-paying job. It’s not rocket science. Excuses excuses excuses. If you want to do onlyfans, own it. But don’t post a thread asking for opinions then be combative to those who suggest different, no point of the thread.

Just don’t come back here and post when it backfires.

'Get a higher paying job'
That's literally what she's trying to do. OnlyFans is a job.

Holluschickie · 17/11/2025 11:41

Bigneonsign · 17/11/2025 11:12

I just saw a video on Instagram of a young, slim, attractive woman lubing up a bedknob that she suggests then goes up her arsehole over on her only fans. Does that sound like something you could do op?

Jesus Christ! This is horrible.Why the hell should OP have to do this with 3 adults?

Usernamenotav · 17/11/2025 11:30

Yea just try it, why not!! I think for the big money you wouldn't get away with being faceless, but for just a top up then I see no reason to not try it

LiftSleepEatRepeat · 17/11/2025 11:26

You asked for other suggestions- I’ve started doing a side hustle of travel and network marketing- lots of successes stories- minimal outlay. Long term I’d feel grim doing OF but I get your struggle x

Bigneonsign · 17/11/2025 11:12

I just saw a video on Instagram of a young, slim, attractive woman lubing up a bedknob that she suggests then goes up her arsehole over on her only fans. Does that sound like something you could do op?

ScarlettOYara · 17/11/2025 10:36

Holluschickie · 17/11/2025 10:34

Probably not. Two of them could share perhaps. Better than Only Fans.

Too true. However, I think the obvious thing is that the adult student DC pay for food at least. This keeps being suggested, but the OP doesn't seem to want to do it. They could easily afford to contribute from their student loans and jobs.

Pherian · 17/11/2025 10:35

CelestialCandyfloss · 17/11/2025 10:25

How is earning quite a bit over the average salary, on a job that you need to be degree-qualified in a 'dead-end job'?? Honestly some of the comments on here are insane.

It’s a dead end if there is no progression.

£40k a year doesn’t require a degree.

What’s insane is how unwilling people are to step out of their comfort zones and instead of considering the possibility that they are worth more, have transferable skills and can earn more without taking their kit off, they think you need a degree for a £40k a year job.

I make over £50k and I have no degree. I will at some point in the next two years be hitting over £70k with keeping my clothes on, ensuring I’m getting the experience I need to obtain that and keeping my skills up to date.

Outside of some very specific careers a degree is not necessary.

Holluschickie · 17/11/2025 10:34

ScarlettOYara · 17/11/2025 10:31

There are four adults living in the house. I don't know if she has a big property?

Probably not. Two of them could share perhaps. Better than Only Fans.

ScarlettOYara · 17/11/2025 10:31

Holluschickie · 17/11/2025 10:27

I still think renting a room to a foreign student may be viable. I have a friend who does this as she was made redundant. She has a lovely masters student from China who is very quiet and studies all day, so much less intrusive than she expected.

There are four adults living in the house. I don't know if she has a big property?

CelestialCandyfloss · 17/11/2025 10:27

Holluschickie · 17/11/2025 08:15

I think we have scared OP away. 😣

Not surprised with all the judgemental, spiteful comments she was getting

Holluschickie · 17/11/2025 10:27

I still think renting a room to a foreign student may be viable. I have a friend who does this as she was made redundant. She has a lovely masters student from China who is very quiet and studies all day, so much less intrusive than she expected.

CelestialCandyfloss · 17/11/2025 10:25

Pherian · 17/11/2025 09:28

I’ve no issue with you considering OF.

It’s your body etc.

I think you’re vastly underestimating the cost to start up (equipment, outfits etc)and it sounds more of a pipe dream.

You are going to be better off simply by finding a higher paid job. If you’re sitting there going that’s not possible, it’s too hard etc… then you need to start planning your exit from that role and what you’re doing next because you’re in a dead end job with zero prospects.

Consider focusing your efforts into your cv and examine your transferable job skills. Speaking to a good recruitment agency will help with that.

How is earning quite a bit over the average salary, on a job that you need to be degree-qualified in a 'dead-end job'?? Honestly some of the comments on here are insane.

CelestialCandyfloss · 17/11/2025 10:23

ByWisePanda · 16/11/2025 23:26

She'll be better off becoming a plumber or a gas engineer. There is so many other ways of making money. She could learn about property that's lucrative. How do people earn on YouTube?

Edited

Yeah, she can't become a plumber or gas engineer whilst also doing another full time job. To make money in property you either need available cash or you need to source some sort of investor. Lots of people earn money on YouTube and it is possible to run a channel in your spare time. There are plenty of channels giving advice about starting, content creation, how to get monitised etc.

WendyErica · 17/11/2025 10:05

CraftyNavySeal · 15/11/2025 10:49

YABU. The average OF account makes something like £200 total.

If you already had a big social media following with people who want to see your content then maybe. What is probably going to happen is that your friends and neighbours will see you at it and you will only make a few quid.

This. Financially you'll probably make about £25.

sharkstale · 17/11/2025 10:02

With kids in uni, I'd say this is a big no no. Their friends could stumble across your account, and you don't know what implications that might have on your kids. That was my first thought. Also, agree with others, faceless you probably won't get far.

Pherian · 17/11/2025 09:28

Daydreamnotbeliever · 15/11/2025 10:44

So for background im a single parent of 3. 2 uni age kids, one older but has additional needs. All 3 live with me still. Im supporting all 3 more or less full. Their father is no contact and has been for over a decade.

I work full time and earn a salary of £40k. Which on paper is ok. In reality, more or less funding 4 adults, not so much. The kids contribute what they can. They pay for their own items. My eldest works part time which is about as much as he can manage. But its not enough. My wage doesnt stretch far enough. I run out of money every month. Theres rent bills heating food etc all falls on me and i cant survive. Theres no luxuries. No fun. No anything. When they move out ill manage but at the minute its impossible. And i cant expect them to contribute more. The eldest doesnt have the capacity and the other two need uni to be the priority they are both doing courses that are intense and do a lot of work outside of lectures.

Im single. However. I have a friend who i hook up with. Its safe. Hes safe. But i have no desire to live with someone and share a life. We date, kinda, go out for drinks sometimes or the cinema, hook up, and have fun.

The idea is he manages an account i make. He makes vids, edits, promotes, markets etc. I do the chats, conversations etc in the eve. We split anything earned, more to me. My suggestion not his. All my idea.

i know its not guaranteed money, infact the opposite, it takes a lot of effort to make something. He has the time to market etc. i dont. It would be faceless. I wouldnt put my face out there. But pretty much anything else goes.

I just cant manage at the minute. Earning more in my role is impossible at the moment. Theres no second jobs i can do. No local bar work. I dont drive. I have no “talents” for an etsy side hustle. I dont have the money to buy equipment to start a printing side hustle or something. I dont have the time for much around my job at the moment. Theres just not other way to make money. Im out of idea and i need to make a few hundred a month to keep my head above water now im funding 4 adults alone pretty much.

The concern is obviously my kids, even though they are all adults. We are a pretty liberal open family and discuss anything and everything. Id probably tell them, but its still a worry.

Would you do it? Could you do it? Have you done it? Can you suggest an alternative?

I’ve no issue with you considering OF.

It’s your body etc.

I think you’re vastly underestimating the cost to start up (equipment, outfits etc)and it sounds more of a pipe dream.

You are going to be better off simply by finding a higher paid job. If you’re sitting there going that’s not possible, it’s too hard etc… then you need to start planning your exit from that role and what you’re doing next because you’re in a dead end job with zero prospects.

Consider focusing your efforts into your cv and examine your transferable job skills. Speaking to a good recruitment agency will help with that.

Rhubarb24 · 17/11/2025 09:01

There was a girl in my town who did it when it was still relatively new. She was in her 20s and stunning looking. She was "smol" apparently and very niche as she was 4ft10, very curvy, heavily tattooed, coloured hair with massive pale green eyes. Very innocent and sweet looking.

She made a bit of money at first, but you have to get yourself out there and put free content on platforms like Reddit to entice people in. She posted stuff on facebook that sounded like her MH was dipping. She was posting that explicit (paid for) content was getting leaked so if you googled her username, full nudes would come up.

Then her dad and his mates got wind of it and so did all of their mates. She posted about having to block a load of "perverts". Tbf, if most of of them had know her since she was little, it is pretty pervy. Then she posted about having really bad MH and that she was coming off everything and all SM. She ended up moving abroad to escape it.

If you did it, you need to consider everything. You'd need to consider the money split for one, bearing in mind that you'rethe one who'd face any repercussions. Nobody will have naked screenshots of him. Nobody would be leaking his content into the public domain. What industry do you work in? Could your employer/industry be funny about it?

You said you son coaches? Football? If so, has he thought about reffing as you can earn around £30-£40 a game.

Cocobobo · 17/11/2025 08:44

Look into bank switches (tax free can get literally hundreds very easily) Google and martin Lewis has a guide. Also look into his market research guide - can usually get around £50 an hour, register with the companies he list & put in the effort applying for everything, try these first!

Alittlefrustrated · 17/11/2025 08:40

Your male friend is not "safe".

GarlicBreadStan · 17/11/2025 08:19

NeedyLimeMember · 17/11/2025 08:15

OP could have asked chat gpt herself though, if she wanted the opinion of a robot.

I didn't read it as an AI response 🤷🏻 but then I'm autistic and often get accused of using AI to write things, so maybe I struggle to tell the difference?

Holluschickie · 17/11/2025 08:15

I think we have scared OP away. 😣