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AIBU - inheritance sad story

483 replies

whattodo1113 · 11/11/2025 10:21

I’m going to break this down as easily as possible.

my grandad who is now 86 had 5 children. (The eldest is my mum)
he split up with my grandma when the children were young.
all the children are now obviously grown up in their 60s.
all of them have wife’s / husbands and their own children. They ALL live good lives and have done well for themselves are by NO means hard up.

my grandad has worked hard all his life and paid his house off etc and was alone for a long long time with not much quality of life. He then met someone and married her and had a daughter later on in life when he was late 50s. This child is grown up now too. He is still with his wife now and has been for 25 years ish. Sorry my numbers aren’t the best and it’s not really relevant.

the whole family welcomed wife and the new child and I must say she’s always been lovely she’s a lovely woman. The daughter they had I loved and still do very much. My grandad has always been a good grandad to us. I have fond memories with him and I love him loads.

so here’s the crunch….
before he met his wife he put his house in the 2 eldest children’s names (my mum included) his train of thought was if anything happened to him or he got ill etc they’d have that house and all those things and he didn’t want it to end up in a charity or whatever I don’t know.

3 years ago as he’s getting very old now he asked them to sign the house back to him as his wife has lived there with him 25 years now and it’s her HOME and their daughter lives there too. She works part time. He’s obviously planning not being here anymore
they have refused him the house and have said when he dies she can stay for 2 years to get on her feet and find somewhere then they will sell it and split the money between the 5 children.

there argument is he left when they were kids and this new child got more of him than they did growing up.
I personally think this is very revengeful of my mum and greedy and not morally right? My grandad is very depressed and cries and I just hate that this is how the end of his life looks. He said his wife has been there the most for him and loved and looked after him and she’s gonna be left in a mess when he goes and she’s doesn’t deserve it. Which I agree.

I’ve told my mum it’s his house. He paid for it. He worked for it. Give it him back. Am I being soft ?? What do you think?? I just personally feel disapointed in them.
may I add nobody visited him often or cared to see him much but they want his house and money?

they’ve all said wife will have his pension that’s enough. Which is about 500 a month I think.

I just can’t stop thinking about him and I’m the only one in the family who has said how he’s being treated is discusting. They think he’s cruel taking the house back but at the end of the day he bought the house and his life situations have changed now and all the kids are so well off with their own businesses etc they don’t NEED it. Xxx

OP posts:
TeenToTwenties · 11/11/2025 10:30

The house isn't the Mum and siblings main home, so will surely be subject to Capital Gains tax when it is sold.

Genevieva · 11/11/2025 10:29

*ownership

Genevieva · 11/11/2025 10:29

TeenToTwenties · 11/11/2025 10:28

I wonder whether the gift of the house stands up (not a legal person).

If he has continued to live there rent free all this time it could be argued that it was a gift with reservations or something?

If you do this kind of thing later in life to avoid care fees they come at you for it.

However if not then he gave the house away, he sadly no longer controls who gets to live in it.

The of worship stands up, but it may be subject to IHT due to beneficial use.

Genevieva · 11/11/2025 10:28

Your Mum and her sibling would face a Capital Gains Tax liability if they gave the house to him. The percentage varies depending on her earnings, but it is quite a hefty bill. He is naïve and unreasonable to expect that of them.

Broadly speaking: a gift is a gift. That’s the whole point. Your Mum and her sibling should perhaps consider offering more than 2 years, but that is their business, not yours. You weren’t there when the gift was made either.

Lastly, if your grandfather is living in it, he should be paying rent. Otherwise your mother may face an inheritance tax bill when he dies.

FuzzyPuffling · 11/11/2025 10:28

But that's not how a will and inheritance works, in the UK at least. Has he legally signed over the house to them?

He needs to see a solicitor.

TeenToTwenties · 11/11/2025 10:28

I wonder whether the gift of the house stands up (not a legal person).

If he has continued to live there rent free all this time it could be argued that it was a gift with reservations or something?

If you do this kind of thing later in life to avoid care fees they come at you for it.

However if not then he gave the house away, he sadly no longer controls who gets to live in it.

whattodo1113 · 11/11/2025 10:26

Because the 2 eldest children are basically the home owners now. He’s tried x

OP posts:
FuzzyPuffling · 11/11/2025 10:24

Why can't he just change his will? See a solicitor.

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