Does your partner attend medical appointments with you?

Two hysteroscopies so he could hold my hand while I experienced horrific pain. It also made him fully appreciate what women go through and how much pain I could tolerate.

One consultant appointment to discuss future treatment.

But they are exceptions to dozens of appts in recent years where I usually go alone.

I didnt say that at all, I said in my clinic thats what happens so you have no choice but go in on your own at first. I was saying how they dont give you an option. The only opinion i gave was that i do find the non medical apppintments strange to go in with someone

I don’t think it’s as simple as blanket saying it must be abuse. There’s all sorts of reasons out there why it might happen

It's definetly strange for every appointment especially non serious ones. And quite often theres safe guarding in place. For example before I see my obestrician while pregnant, the midwife sees me first and dh cant come in. Gives women a chance to be open if anything is wrong

I don’t believe 50% of Drs appointments are attended by couples but if they are then I’d be interested to know how the Dr would check that both parties are genuinely fine with it and it’s not a coercive controlling relationship. ( and asking the question in front of them both doesn’t really count. I remember having my DD and the health visitor asking me if there was any DV and my DH was sat right there. A complete fucking dogs dinner of a question )

I’d be worried they were in an abusive relationship tbh

Recording the appointment is a good idea, I haven't tried but always leave DS appointments feeling like I didn't take it all in properly.

DH came when I got a recall to the breast clinic for the results. I was fine but very nervous beforehand. Also when I had a hysteroscopy. I couldn’t have driven home afterwards.
He came recently after I had an epileptic seizure so he could help by recalling what it was like.
Gor regular appointments, no. If he gives me a life he would normally stay in the waiting room.

I go to appointments alone, im currently being assessed for MS and go to my tests and neuro appointments on my end. At the end of my last appointment, the consultant did say to feel free to bring a family member or a friend with me next time. I will probably take my mum because she really wants to come over my DH

My mum goes to every appointment with my dad.

He has very bad medical anxiety/PTSD, so doesn’t take much in. What he hears is a lot worse than what the doctor says. So she goes with him to make sure that he doesn’t get the wrong end of the stick and she can calm him down. For example, he currently has a cyst. He has been told after a previous scan it’s not cancer. He has a new scan coming up and he’s telling everyone to check whether it’s cancerous or not - it’s not, it’s to check how big it is to see how they treat it.

No. He attended most visits when I was pregnant with DC1.
Only attended for the scans on DC2.
If I needed him, he would, but I'm more comfortable going alone.

Nope, my husband has only attended a couple of important ones with me.
My best friend now accompanies me to important appointments to make notes as I suffer with memory loss

Why?

For serious things dh comes with me, like scans and a breast biopsy things like that. He doesn’t come into the room he sits outside in the waiting room.
Other routine stuff no. But maybe when we’re retired and have nothing to do we’ll go to all appointments together but still can’t imagine we’ll sit in the room

How is it your business?

My stepdad has diabetes and some ongoing related issues with his feet and my Mum attends every appointment with him. I find it bizarre, he’s a grown Man knocking 60.

Depends what the appointment is. Run of the mill stuff or routine hospital scans/tests then no. If its a consultant appointment or something that involves treatment then I will bring someone. DH faints at the sight of blood so I tend to bring my hard-as-nails, totally unflappable best friend for anything remotely 'gory'. The dentistry under sedation was interesting by all accounts- I called DH a variety of interesting things, told him I was going to divorce him and marry the dentist instead.

Good grief no, I am not a child. I dont need my husband with me to go for a dental check up.

Its not 1800.

I think it's when the partner always goes in consulting room also.

Can I ask why you always go together?

Dh has done when I have asked him to - the support is invaluable. But mostly there's no need.

I hate that I am saying this but I do take my husband to appointments that I anticipate may be difficult.

Medical misogyny is rife unfortunately and women are frequently dismissed, not listened to, not believed or their health problems inappropriately attributed to psychological disorders.

We are much more likely than male patients to be prescribed antidepressants, and life threatening conditions such as heart disease and cancer are often diagnosed later, with the female patient investigated after a higher number of consultations than a male with similar symptoms.

We also receive lower doses of pain relief per unit of bodyweight, and shorter courses of antibiotics with a higher threshold for starting treatment than a male with the same condition.

Between 70 and 90% of victims of barbaric electroconvulsive treatment are female.

All of these disparities are further enhanced if you are poor, disabled or a woman of colour.

So yes I take my husband. He doesn't have to speak, he just has to sit there, 6ft and bearded, and in my experience it does make a difference to the standard of care provided.

It really, really shouldn't, but it does.

My other half comes to my hospital and doctor appointment with me for the last nearly 2 years as I have been very poorly and my memory is bad and the doctor will sometimes come out with stuff I really need to remember so that's why I need him.

I don't know if it's different now but when I was attacked by my ex and he eventually agreed to take me to A&E he stayed in the room the entire time and I kept wishing someone would ask him to leave but they never did 😔

My husband came with me to my appointment to talk about menopause. We had talked about it before the appointment and I felt it was importance for him to be there and to be aware of my health needs at this time in my life.

I don't for things like the dentist, smear tests, blood tests, GP appointments, vaccines etc but I have had my husband there for some more serious appointments where I felt like I may be bombarded with information or may need a bit of support.

I do find your friends set up a bit odd, but I suppose each to their own.