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That the phrases "The Mrs", "The Wife", etc set my teeth on edge!

89 replies

Mrsnothingthanks · 25/10/2025 18:15

So sexist IMO.
To clarify, I have no issue with "My wife," but "The" anything I do.
My dad was out shopping once with my mum when he bumped into someone he knew loosely. The man said (in front of my mum, one of the strongest and most independent women I know): "Oh, is this Her Indoors?" Say whaaaaaaaaaat?!!! You can imagine her reaction!!! 😆

OP posts:
Mrsnothingthanks · 25/10/2025 20:32

@Tattyhabits It's putting you down whenever it's used - it's misogynistic.

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Growlybear83 · 25/10/2025 20:31

My husband often refers to me as the Old Trout. It doesn’t bother me at all.

Funnywonder · 25/10/2025 20:31

I have heard DP refer to me as ‘the wife’ on the phone and we’re not even bloody married. Really pisses me off. I always get on his case about it afterwards.

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 25/10/2025 20:30

I work with men convicted of domestic abuse and it’s very much expected that we correct this as it’s misogynistic.

Tattyhabits · 25/10/2025 20:30

I honestly don’t care. If it’s said in order to put me down somehow, then 🤷‍♀️it’s water off a ducks back, if it’s said with tongue in cheek or affectionately, then I’ll either laugh or appreciate the sentiment. Life’s too short.

orangewasp · 25/10/2025 20:28

Agree - I also hate 'other/better half' - you're a whole person in your own right!

OpalFruitsMakeYourMouthWater · 25/10/2025 20:28

‘Our lass’ and ‘the Mrs’ was what my ex-husband used to say in front of his friends. I, too, am a strong, independent woman. Note, he is now ‘ex-husband’ 🙄

Mrsnothingthanks · 25/10/2025 20:26

Pleased I'm not the only one who really dislikes them! And they're "factually" incorrect for many married women these days (including me) who are not a "Missus" or a Mrs at any rate!
I've never personally heard of a man being addressed as "The Mr" or "The Husband" or along similar lines so this surprises me.

OP posts:
GreenBlorgle · 25/10/2025 20:26

Well, but they’re a useful way of weeding out habitual misogynists who get their humour from Bernard Manning and his ilk.

ThatGreatMember · 25/10/2025 20:23

'The missus' makes me vomit.

Thepeopleversuswork · 25/10/2025 20:20

They are very sexist but they don’t really bother me. I actually find them more affectionate than anything.

But I only really hear them ironically. If I heard them in earnest I would probably laugh.

AmethystAnnotation · 25/10/2025 20:19

I often refer to DH as 'the husband'.

CanSeeClearlyNowTheRainHasGone · 25/10/2025 20:18

My friends routinely have introduced their DP as "the man", "hubbie", "himself" etc

We all have foibles. I dont see why its necessary to see malice in everything.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 25/10/2025 18:16

Well yes because they’re awful and misogynistic