I don't like how people tend to speak to their children

I’ve certainly been authoritative - but I’ve never yelled at my child. I don’t understand people who yell at their kids then ask why their kids act up. Isn’t it obvious?

I don’t think it’s a given that people will or should do that when replying to threads.

I read the OP and saw no mention in their post of bribing with chocolate.

The OP wrote more than one post. You can see them all by clicking ‘see all’.

I read the OP and saw no mention in their post of bribing with chocolate.

I'm sure you've never ONCE ever snapped at anyone in your entire life...

I don't think changing my ADHD kids bedroom "more appealing" will magically shut their brain down a nf stop them having 300,000 whizzing thoughts run through their head.

I don't want to go to the supermarket either thanks, I'm tired, it boring, it's busy and noisy and stressful.... It guess what.....I have to go and so does DD. I can't just allow her to stay at home alone.

Because you said you agreed with the op and in order to get the child to do as she wanted she bribed them with chocolate.
I didn’t just pluck that question from mid air.

Demands shouldnt really be made of children, generally. You could give your child autonomy over what they eat. If someone demanded I eat something that I really didn't want to eat, I'd be dreaming about chocolate cake too. If your child has issues going to bed then you make their sleeping environment more appealing and they might want to then, on their own accord. If they don't like school, you try to do the same and make them feel good about going, by reminding them about their friends at school, or suggesting that teachers will help them. If they don't want to go to the supermarket, then consider that they are tired. It is all about getting on their level and understanding from their perspective. Bribery can speed things up but I wouldnt use it to make a child do something they really didnt want to do.
It's still your responsibility to be respectful towards children and not abusive towards them which is what you are doing if you are often shouting at them, speaking to them like crap. They are not adults but they are still a little individual person in need of guidance and not threats and what is essentially abuse. The way a lot of parents speak to their children makes me wince and saying that you are at your wits end or stressed is an excuse, the same excuse abusers use to domestically abuse their partners.

Why would I need to bribe them with chocolate? I just tell them to do things and they do it. Or if they don’t, we have a conversation about it and I explain why whatever thing it is I’m asking them to do needs to be done. In other words, I treat them with respect and understanding - as I would do an adult. No bribery involved.

You can bring up good kids without bribing them OR talking to them like dirt.

But you have no idea what led up to that point.

Can you, hand on heart, swear you've never ONCE in their entire lives, snapped at your child, never said "sit down", never once lost patience...never once said something ina tone that might be interpreted as rude to your own child?

Demands shouldnt really be made of children, generally. You could give your child autonomy over what they eat. If someone demanded I eat something that I really didn't want to eat, I'd be dreaming about chocolate cake too. If your child has issues going to bed then you make their sleeping environment more appealing and they might want to then, on their own accord. If they don't like school, you try to do the same and make them feel good about going, by reminding them about their friends at school, or suggesting that teachers will help them. If they don't want to go to the supermarket, then consider that they are tired. It is all about getting on their level and understanding from their perspective. Bribery can speed things up but I wouldnt use it to make a child do something they really didnt want to do.
It's still your responsibility to be respectful towards children and not abusive towards them which is what you are doing if you are often shouting at them, speaking to them like crap. They are not adults but they are still a little individual person in need of guidance and not threats and what is essentially abuse. The way a lot of parents speak to their children makes me wince and saying that you are at your wits end or stressed is an excuse, the same excuse abusers use to domestically abuse their partners.

You can bring up good kids without bribing them OR talking to them like dirt.

Some parents do speak terribly to their children. But a lot of parents have probably just said they same thing about 15 times.

But I'm very amused you think you have discovered some magic touch because you bribed a kid with chocolate.

Because they didn't listen the first 32 times?

Why would I need to bribe them with chocolate? I just tell them to do things and they do it. Or if they don’t, we have a conversation about it and I explain why whatever thing it is I’m asking them to do needs to be done. In other words, I treat them with respect and understanding - as I would do an adult. No bribery involved.

An example… I walked past a mum at the station this morning. She was yelling at her child, who must have been about five or six - telling him to shut up, sit down, etc. Of course being spoken to like that is going to affect him.

Demands shouldnt really be made of children, generally. You could give your child autonomy over what they eat. If someone demanded I eat something that I really didn't want to eat, I'd be dreaming about chocolate cake too. If your child has issues going to bed then you make their sleeping environment more appealing and they might want to then, on their own accord. If they don't like school, you try to do the same and make them feel good about going, by reminding them about their friends at school, or suggesting that teachers will help them. If they don't want to go to the supermarket, then consider that they are tired. It is all about getting on their level and understanding from their perspective. Bribery can speed things up but I wouldnt use it to make a child do something they really didnt want to do.
It's still your responsibility to be respectful towards children and not abusive towards them which is what you are doing if you are often shouting at them, speaking to them like crap. They are not adults but they are still a little individual person in need of guidance and not threats and what is essentially abuse. The way a lot of parents speak to their children makes me wince and saying that you are at your wits end or stressed is an excuse, the same excuse abusers use to domestically abuse their partners.

So do you bribe your DC with chocolate anytime they don’t want to do something?