Is this rude from a child? Age 6, furious reaction from teacher

Mine was always getting into trouble for things like this. He came across very pedantic and literal. It used to really upset him. Being told off constantly for being rude. I used to try to explain- if there is an emergency and somebody has told you to stop or be quiet, you need to do it right now and just think the literal meaning in your head. He is asd but mainstream- he can manage now he is older but he was always being told off when he was little.

Yes I am a primary school teacher, and a good one too.
No adults like children being a smart arse, and your son at six should know to follow the instructions of his teacher. I probably would have replied with a 'Just get on with your work!' but I can imagine how annoying the teacher found the comment.

Sadly they are both. 6 is very very young. The teachers are basically being paid by results ( as in Victorian times) Also now everybody has to have a difference or a syndrome. They probably need an early night.
30 odd children, the National Curriculum, no TA....no wonder it's shit.

Sorry I disagree. I was a primary aht/senco and behaviour specialist. My School was given recognition from the LA for having no ft or pt exclusions for 3 academic years. It was in a challenging area. I don't believe this 6 year old behaviour warranted this response. I agree maybe the teacher was at the end of her tether and just snapped and it's not the end of the world reqlly but I don't agree that he was rude or out of order he did put his hand up and 6 year olds are impulsive and very literal too. I also know that children often get very sad if they were told off for something they genuinely didn't mean to do or didn't do. He was probably making an honest and genuine comment from his point of view and not trying to be rude and that's why her raising her voice is even more painful to him. op just needs to have a chat with the teacher to get her version of the events and go from there. I think if the teacher knew how much she had upset him she would want to make it right. In my experience the best way to get good behaviour from children is through asserting boundaries firmly (e.g maintaining them and not giving in) but gently e.g ensuring we are not humiliating or shaming them into compliance. It can be done.

So your son was being a smart arse, got a telling off, and the teacher is the problem?

tell me again why teachers are leaving the profession?

Absolutely, you’re well out of it. I am stunned at the lack of support amongst parents in my son’s class for behaviour, from adults who should know better.

My child (7) got rightly sent out to the deputies for chatting and ignoring reminders to stop. Mine and my DH’s response- apologise to his teacher and deputies, authoritative telling off from us both, DC told it was completely unacceptable, zero excuses, removal of privileges at home. We’ve nipped that in the bud pretty quickly. Teacher (who is lovely) was genuinely surprised and appreciative of our response, which speaks volumes of the general level of parental undermining.

Others sent out for the same- one Mum went round telling other parents in the playground the teacher is horrible, strict, her child only talks to help others, it wasn’t her child’s fault but other children, she will complain to the Head. My DS: her daughter is really naughty. Obviously! I’ve seen her appalling behaviour myself and her mum says absolutely nothing to correct her. What a joke.

Children have no right to constantly disrupt learning of both themselves and others.

He wa being cheeky but not at all very cheeky. To be ranted at about by a teacher is pathetic. Really weak and self indulgent of the teacher.

What is wrong with a, “Ho hi, yes very good Cedric. Now, the rest of you keep schtum thank ms very much.”

I hope you find out what happened.

Don’t use schools then, home educate. One less entitled family for teachers to deal with.

blinkblinkblinkblink
If that's your language of choice, I imagine the education department, also, had zero regrets over your leaving..

Good for you for making that decision. Obviously was no longer a good fit for you.

He's not 10, he's 6!! Different situation and badly handled by the 'teacher'.. You'd have given him a 'right telling off?.. You're a primary school teacher?? This makes me very concerned indeed .. 😡

perfectly articulated!! 🎯🎯🎯

I believe children. Especially 6 years olds, little more than babies. His answer was NOT him being a smart arse. He was pointing something out that he found needed clarifying. In his little 6 year old brain he needs an adult to help process things with him. To shout at him for it until he cries is unacceptable. They're small children, not inmates in frigging prison. I hate schools with a passion.

apples to oranges, fgs

Urgh! Shouting at me because I dared take the fucking spinning, light-up, flower fan pen you gave your child for school because unsurprisingly, they weren't using it for writing! It was a toy. You gave your child a noisy, distracting toy so they weren't doing what they're at school to do... listen and participate in lessons to learn! And your child was 9. Old enough to stop and put it away after the first ask, not carry on until I had to take it and keep it in my drawer until home time. (No I didn't fucking "steal" your child's belongings you nut job).

Zero regrets for leaving teaching.

I work in school and six year olds absolutely can be smart arsed and push boundaries. At six they are not babies and most will understand what the teacher meant in the scenario described by the OP- which was 'I am looking for you to work independently'

Yes what he said was rude and the remark was ill timed. And yes sometimes in school kids need to get on with the task they have been given.

Or it means the pain in your stomach or the head or any other body part that isn't chronic.

It's not the same thing, although there is some overlap. Someone could clearly have an injury but NOT currently be in any pain, and they should tell the teacher so that they can go and have it checked out just in case. And someone may be in pain without being injured, like for example a severe stomach ache, in which case they also need to tell the teacher. I'd point out the difference to your child and once he understands, suggest that maybe next time he could approach the teacher after class to ask for an explanation of the difference, rather than interrupting when he is incorrect or not sure that he's correct.

I quite agree. Teachers being told off by parents for telling the child that they need to work on their handwriting 🙄

Shocking isn’t it?
What on earth are future generations going to look like if this is the way things are going.

Thank you for your balanced response. Possibly a different set up for 3-5year olds than for a yr1 / 2 child where the day is more structured and they are sat for periods of time to do maths, literacy, phonics etc.

Added to that, we seem to be in a period of time where gentle parenting/lack of parenting/children who've never heard the word 'no', seems to be leading us down a path of disruptive children, unruly children, poor listening skills etc. Sometimes firm boundaries and a firm voice are what's needed as some just simply don't listen.

Neither us have any way of really knowing what happened but I really doubt that the teacher went on a 2 minute tirade or that the child cried for hours. If this was the case, I'm sure the teacher really would have mentioned that the child's behaviour had warranted a good telling off, or the parent would have noticed at home time that their child had been crying for hours.

Incidentally, a parent alleged last year that their child had cried all night long and it was my fault. All I'd done was be in the same room (library) as her and a few others whilst they'd collected books. Nothing more. Apparently she felt under pressure 🤷‍♀️

Did you speak with the teacher today?
As you say at 6 years old, if I say something to my little girl and she doesn’t understand she will sometimes ask me to explain.

it is more the continued shouting while he was crying and being consoled by his friends that would be the concern for me x

In a classroom not doing as you have been instructed by the teacher is rude because it’s antisocial.

It is a demand for attention that is not in the best interest of the class community at that moment.

Tell your son that. Be disappointed and get him to promise not to do that again.

I suspect that if he was shouted at/ firmly corrected while he apologised it was more a case of thinking what he has to say is more important that what he is being told to do, I.e. button it so the teacher can interact with another individual/small group.

He does not sound like a child short of confidence.

Completely agree. When I taught, I found lots of parents enabled terrible behaviour. Not only enabled, but actively would argue with teachers for attempting to use any kind of discipline.