Is this rude from a child? Age 6, furious reaction from teacher

Or it is a colleague arriving in a room full of noisy 6 year olds and seeing a colleague struggling - so stepping in to support and silence the ones who are not behaving. What would you do in that situation - would you just walk out the room and not say a word?

I can imagine this was said as a joke, cant imagine people take this as a serious thing...

Yes that was an odd dynamic.

I guess that's where I got the impression that the staff knew they were all on the same page about it - as if it had been an ongoing issue.

Totally agree with this post. This is a normal 6 year old boy challenging boundaries. It's disappointing that so many on here want to label him as autistic on such flimsy evidence. ( What sort of people rush to label a child they don't know with a psychological condition?)
By the sounds of it the poor behaviour in the lesson had been brewing for a while.The teacher had tried the 'softly - softly' approach and had been ignored so they set a firmer boundary. This is normal behaviour management. The language used is not the main issue here.This child chose to challenge the boundary and the telling-off was a consequence.
What happened subsequently is very telling.
The IP's child has gone home upset at being told off and has told a 'version' of the truth which they know will press buttons with their parent.
Sure enough the parent is straight onto MN and looking for reasons to criticise the teacher. Meanwhile this child has shifted attention away from their behaviour and the adults are re-enforcing this by their criticism of the teacher.
IMO this is a dangerous precedent to set.
If you want a well behaved, well adjusted child, back your teacher and teach your child that behaviour choices have consequences

You child was cheeky and in the midst of a teacher calming 30+ children down he chose to speak up (he had been asked not to speak) and to criticise a teachers language use (who was probably stressed and struggling to find exact words).
In addition you admit your son is sensitive. And at age 6 he is learning some valuable life lessons about how and when you speak, how to navigate social situations (school is totally different from home)
While we can pick fault with both teachers language with hindsight, we need to consider the moment they were facing.

Personally it sounds like the son needs to learn when not to speak up, and will learn some resilience in life is needed, and that when there are 30+ in a class being the one to stand out for negative reasons is not a Good Thing.

And I personally would be asking him what he would do differently next time...

Id be a bit miffed if I was the first teacher and another teacher walked in and started shouting in my lesson. I think that is very rude.

Yes, my dc can differ in their responses to reprimands as well.

But I think if this little boy was sobbing so much, it probably was a bollocking.

On the other hand, if he makes a lot of these comments, a bollocking probably was in the offing.

Yes, I didn't mean to imply it was the same teacher, but I see I have implied that.

I just wondered if it was a general staff room gripe.

I'm not so sure the child was actually confused as such. It sounds as though the teachers didn't think so either.

A child would be hit for putting their hand up and asking a question. Can I ask when you were at school, I'm in my 70s and the Nuns who taught me were quite handy with the cane but they didn't hit six year olds.

He was a little bit cheeky but for the teacher to say that in the first place is out of order. My son is so quiet at school and would therefore be terrified to speak to the teacher after that. Also shouting is not an appropriate response

It wasn't the teacher who was telling the kids not to interrupt her who upset the child.

A child is confused by what a teacher says and puts their hand up to clarify. I can't see what's wrong with that, children should be able to ask teachers questions.

Check with The Teacher
Someone could look at DD wrong and she would claim to have beeen shouted at while DS could get a reall bollocking and hardly notice

Is there any way your six year old child is not remembering well or is exaggerating?
First step, I would be going in and speaking with the teacher and gaining their interpretation of the event.

Probably good your friend is retiring as it 100% should not be that way - she should not be yelling all day.

I can tell you that it is not normal to scream at children .........

You are meant to nurture the young and teach them positive behaviours not scream or send them to stand in the corner again humiliating them as a person, that teaches nothing.

All OP's DS has learned is that teachers are scary and you can't trust them to help you if you have a question.

There are other ways to enforce discipline if its needed.

I'm assuming you are quite old, as your comments suggest being out of touch with todays education.

Who has said the teacher 'screamed' at him?

It's a hard one op, because I think people take these comments from children quite differently.

One of my friends has a little boy who makes "interesting observations" about everything. His mum always beams and says "He is SO observant" and quite honestly I always quietly think "You mean so impertinent."

The sorts of things he says are " why do you have that long umbrella instead of a proper one that folds up?" or " why don't you ever make your dc finish their snack?" or "why has your dc got that old scooter, not a [insert brand name; this "observant" kid is big on brand names!] ?" But there is almost always a thinly concealed judgment in it; it isn't just observant, and I can see your dc's comment was similar in that regard.

After a while it just gets so that you feel like saying "why don't you mind your own business"" But his mum think he is chatty and observant.

I think by 6 children should be starting to learn that some things can be privately wondered at or observed and a filter can be a useful social tool. If she was trying to get the class under control, I can see it might have grated even more.

Making a child cry so much seems excessive however, and, like you, I would not be happy if that happened to my child. But is there a chance he makes a lot of these sorts of comments? Because people do reach tipping point.

You only have a 6 year old child’s version of that and it’s seems ok to me given that when I was at school behaviour like that would have got a clip round the ear and sent to stand in the corner facing the wall for the rest of the class.
My friends an HLTA and is retiring early because she’s fedup of having to shout all day. She can hardly speak by evening. She loved her job once but says the children nowadays are starting school with no idea how to behave.
OP’s child just learned a good lesson that actions have consequences and she shouldn’t diminish what he’s learned

Yelling at a child for expressing developmentally normal and appropriate curiosity is not "behaviour management", it's emotional abuse.

yeah my smart arse DC used to turn on the waterworks when they were being ticked off.

I used to fall for it when they was 3/4 but started to wise up after that.

He was wrong to be facetious when the teacher was making it perfectly clear that she didn’t want interruptions. Lots of teachers say similar things when they’re being interrupted every five seconds.
I find it hard to believe he could communicate and know that he was sobbing for two minutes and even more unbelievable that the visiting teacher would continue to shout at him during these two minutes.
Presumably he didn’t seem upset at pick up time? Why was he crying about it again at bedtime?
If you’re concerned then speak to the teacher and get a fuller picture. Be prepared to hear that your son might not be the quiet, sensitive boy at school that you think he is though.

A six year old definitely wouldn't be reliable in calculating the time of the 'rant'.

What have you said to him in response to his backchat when a teacher has expressly told them not to talk? If you som is so scared of the shorties of this teacher, why is he making wise cracks?

Perhaps this is why the teacher is having to be so strict?

He put his hand up, but was he invited to speak? OP doesn't say.

OP trust your gut here. Something happened that really upset and shook your little boy, to the extent they were still upset and crying about it at bedtime. That is not right. 6 years old is little and they won’t get everything right, they have child like reasoning and often speak what they observe or have ideas about. It is so normal for young children to speak plainly ‘say what they see’, it is not necessarily being cheeky, just observational. I would be horrified if my primary aged DC came home as upset as you described and concerned if the upset continued to bedtime.

I don’t think this is a normal outcome from a standard, appropriate teacher telling off, ie firmly but calmly boundary setting with a child, it sounds to me a heavy handed rebuke akin to a verbal bashing, which is not ok.

I would raise it with the school and see what they say (they will of course defend the action taken and minimise if it was indeed heavy handed) but more importantly keep a close watch on your son and see how he is in the coming days and weeks. If he is miserable at school that is a red flag and I would enquire with the school what is going on and consider moving them if the concerns are not addressed. Otherwise if your son is fine and happy then hopefully this was just a one-off poor handling by the teacher on that occasion and they are not normally like this.

The teacher isn’t working in a boardroom. How do you present your slides with all the over-50s shouting you down?

@Happyher you think its ok to scream at a 6 year old child to the point of making them cry and humiliating them by continuing to yell while they are crying

You think that is normal and appropriate behaviour by a teacher ?

If DS had been 16 maybe you would be right - he is 6!

Gosh, I am glad you're not my child's teacher