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Is this rude from a child? Age 6, furious reaction from teacher

867 replies

partytimed · 02/10/2025 21:48

My DS was at school today and his teacher addressed the class saying “I don’t want to hear from you unless you need the toilet, you’re in pain or injured.” My DS raised his hand and said “I’m pain and injured is kind of the same thing.” Another teacher overheard and shouted at him so much he was crying and still crying about it at bedtime.

obviously I only have his account of the incident so this is all the detail I have. He didn’t think he had said anything wrong. I’ve noticed this year he’s complained of strict scary teachers and he’s becoming anxious about going to school. Would appreciate opinions on whether this apparently very big telling off was justified. He said his friends were comforting afterwards and he was crying and apologising whilst the teacher continued to shout.

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MerryUmberHedgehog · 18/07/2026 10:35

They need to learn to be quiet. 6 isnt too young. Your child asked what might seem to him as an innocent question, and Im sure he wasnt trying to be funny, but from a teachers perspective, it is not on because it potentially opens up an unnecessary conversation. Older kids love to do it and it needs to be nipped in the bud. Your lad will get over his telling off and hopefully wont grow up to be the irritating kid!

Makemineacosmo · 18/07/2026 10:28

ImImmortalNowBabyDoll · 16/07/2026 11:09

The problem is the number of parents who seem to believe that the only child that matters is Little Johnny and the other children should just sit and wait patiently whilst Little Johnny entertains everyone with his hilarious wisecracks.

This is 100% accurate. So many parents really do expect other adults and indeed, other children, to tolerate their child's poor behaviour. Often because 'it's just their way'.

ImImmortalNowBabyDoll · 16/07/2026 11:09

OchonAgusOchonOh · 08/10/2025 12:27

Very hard to explain to non-teachers.

It's not in the least bit hard to explain to non-teachers. Anyone with a modicum of common sense would understand the difference between a classroom full of children and a 1-1 with little Johnny.

The problem is the number of parents who seem to believe that the only child that matters is Little Johnny and the other children should just sit and wait patiently whilst Little Johnny entertains everyone with his hilarious wisecracks.

ImImmortalNowBabyDoll · 16/07/2026 11:05

Children are always saying they've been shouted at when really they were just spoken to in a firm tone. The teacher was clearly at the end of her tether with them so another teacher stepped in to handle disrespectful backchat.

He was cheeky and he got told off. He's upset because he was embarrassed and knows he shouldn't have said what he said.

Let him learn from it and move on.

LemaxObsessive · 16/01/2026 10:22

@partytimedYeah your DS sounds like a smartarse.

LemaxObsessive · 16/01/2026 10:21

Wayk · 10/01/2026 13:08

That is a horrible way to speak to young children. She could say guys would you mind only putting your hand up please if you need the bathroom? It is no way to speak to young children.

Oh fgs it’s lighthearted!

LemaxObsessive · 16/01/2026 10:21

SugarBrown · 02/10/2025 21:52

“I don’t want to hear from you unless you need the toilet, you’re in pain or injured.”

wtf

🙄 It’s a jokey, lighthearted way of saying shut up and get on with it!

Magsbd · 15/01/2026 18:42

It’s not normal if the teacher shouted at him as he described. Or it certainly shouldn’t be. Hope you got to the bottom of it.

Mere1 · 10/01/2026 18:14

SugarBrown · 02/10/2025 21:52

“I don’t want to hear from you unless you need the toilet, you’re in pain or injured.”

wtf

The context may well explain the statement.

Wayk · 10/01/2026 13:08

That is a horrible way to speak to young children. She could say guys would you mind only putting your hand up please if you need the bathroom? It is no way to speak to young children.

Ilikesundays · 10/01/2026 11:46

When my dd was in Infants, her teacher threw something at her saying”Here, Jenny. Catch!” And my dd responded “My name’s Jenny Brown not Jenny Catch” and got a huge telling off for being cheeky. She’s 48 now and still remembers it.

cardibach · 10/10/2025 20:58

SugarBrown · 10/10/2025 20:56

not really sure why that's relevant - 6 year old kid is still unlikely to get the humour.

They don’t need to. They can still understand the instruction. Don’t interrupt me unless it’s necessary.

SugarBrown · 10/10/2025 20:56

HerNeighbourTotoro · 10/10/2025 18:37

It does not mean that a teacher needs to be a machine and can't say something a random child may not get. Humour saved me many times and it's one of the reasons I can still do the job. Regardless if on some occasions one student out of 30 didnt get something I said.

not really sure why that's relevant - 6 year old kid is still unlikely to get the humour.

HerNeighbourTotoro · 10/10/2025 18:37

SugarBrown · 03/10/2025 14:22

'people' no, six year olds probably. I have a 5 year old, soon to be 6 year old that would not understand that is a joke.

I had already commented that I would understand at a more senior age a jokey comment like this, wouldn't really think it were appropriate at year 1/2.

It does not mean that a teacher needs to be a machine and can't say something a random child may not get. Humour saved me many times and it's one of the reasons I can still do the job. Regardless if on some occasions one student out of 30 didnt get something I said.

HevenlyMeS · 08/10/2025 22:43

Yes completely concur with you &
It's never cool to just yell at such a young Child 😥

herbaceous · 08/10/2025 13:39

As they say, 'yet here we are...'

CoffeeCantata · 08/10/2025 13:27

OchonAgusOchonOh · 08/10/2025 12:27

Very hard to explain to non-teachers.

It's not in the least bit hard to explain to non-teachers. Anyone with a modicum of common sense would understand the difference between a classroom full of children and a 1-1 with little Johnny.

You’d think!😄

OchonAgusOchonOh · 08/10/2025 12:27

CoffeeCantata · 08/10/2025 09:49

I remember a Y! class I had once. It contained 3 bright but cheeky little boys. I liked them but I had to keep the lid on a bit. They were very much capable of wasting time with 'clever-clever' come-backs and banter.

That's all very well from their point of view (and parents find it hard to understand why teacher's can't allow this to run unchecked) but it wasted precious time which maybe other less able children truly needed and distracted the class when they'd been settled nicely into a task.

Very hard to explain to non-teachers. It always make the teacher sound like a kill-joy automaton. But you have to consider the needs of all the children, not just some the most confident and articulate.

Playtime is the place for these funny conversations with the children - happy to banter back and forth with a 5/6/7 year old in the playground!!

Very hard to explain to non-teachers.

It's not in the least bit hard to explain to non-teachers. Anyone with a modicum of common sense would understand the difference between a classroom full of children and a 1-1 with little Johnny.

CoffeeCantata · 08/10/2025 10:44

notnorman · 08/10/2025 10:19

Yep!

Although on MN people tend to the view that parents choose private schools for snobbish reasons, in my experience it’s hardly ever that.

It’s CLASS SIZE, stupid!

In a class of less than 20 the experience of both students and teachers is utterly transformed. As a teacher you have more time for everyone and children don’t have to wait so long for the teacher’s attention. This is a massive issue, I think. A few minutes is an age to small children and they can get completely turned off by having to wait so long to be heard or to have their questions answered. My personal view is that it would be money well spent-spent to have mush smaller classes in KS1. It would set children up so much better for later years and enable them to cope with a class of 30 once they can read and write fairly confidently.

notnorman · 08/10/2025 10:21

CoffeeCantata · 08/10/2025 09:49

I remember a Y! class I had once. It contained 3 bright but cheeky little boys. I liked them but I had to keep the lid on a bit. They were very much capable of wasting time with 'clever-clever' come-backs and banter.

That's all very well from their point of view (and parents find it hard to understand why teacher's can't allow this to run unchecked) but it wasted precious time which maybe other less able children truly needed and distracted the class when they'd been settled nicely into a task.

Very hard to explain to non-teachers. It always make the teacher sound like a kill-joy automaton. But you have to consider the needs of all the children, not just some the most confident and articulate.

Playtime is the place for these funny conversations with the children - happy to banter back and forth with a 5/6/7 year old in the playground!!

And also this!

notnorman · 08/10/2025 10:19

ThankYouNigel · 02/10/2025 22:09

And this discussion right here is the reason why teachers are leaving the profession in droves…parents, enough! Either get a grip over minor incidents/trivial nonsense, or continue to over-analyse every nanosecond of your child’s day, but stop complaining when more teachers leave. Here’s a thought- if you are so distrustful and so perfect in your every interaction with your perfect children, you are free to home educate. Put your money where your mouth is!

Yep!

SugarPlumpFairyCakes · 08/10/2025 09:56

CoffeeCantata · 08/10/2025 09:52

That's a funny question! Why do you think I shouted?

I didn’t think anything.

I asked if you did.

CoffeeCantata · 08/10/2025 09:56

SugarPlumpFairyCakes · 08/10/2025 09:51

Did you shout at them?

Each incident had to be judged individually in the moment, but I'd do one of the following:

  • give them a stern look
  • say 'Yes, but I've asked you to be quiet and do x, Freddie'.
  • say 'Let's talk about that later'.
  • say 'We're not talking about x just now'.
  • or similar!
Minniliscious · 08/10/2025 09:53

I think that’s very smart for a 6 year old! As the teacher, I’d have had a little snigger.

CoffeeCantata · 08/10/2025 09:52

Aaarrggh awful typos in that post. Teachers, not teacher's etc etc.

Apologies.

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