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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

The hatred towards cyclists/horse riders etc

467 replies

RH1234 · 06/08/2025 17:53

Following on from a conversation on another thread; AIBU to think that the hatred towards all cyclists/other road users I.e. horses is completely atrocious and unjustified.

Lots of people will make comments about “I bet they were in Lycra”, “I dislike road cyclists”, “they don’t even pay road tax”.

My question is not; do you hate cyclists. My question is why do you hate me someone you have not met) as a cyclist?

For perspective:

  1. I pay VED (Road tax doesn’t exist) on 3 vehicles.
  2. I have insurance for my bikes - which includes public liability etc. My cycle insurance is genuinely more expensive than my car, I also have free insurance through British Cycling.
  3. I don’t run red lights (for transparency, I have been through one red light, floor sensors don’t pick up carbon fibre, it was 5am, after waiting a few minutes, with no cars I went through)
  4. I cycle an average of 19-23mph, I can overtake tractors near me, I’m smaller than a tractor surely you can pass me.
  5. I do ride two abreast if in a group, but if passing is difficult, as per the Highway Code we ensure you can pass when safe.
  6. When riding on my own, I wave cars past so they can often go before they can see.
  7. Yes I wear Lycra - but you try cycling 100 miles without decent chamois in place. I won’t mention leg hair as that’s a whole different subject for you.
  8. My wife use to love cycling, but won’t ride on the road now due to the drivers attitudes.

AIBU to be annoyed that I don’t do any of the things people moan about, yet people will hate me, some people will hurl abuse, some people will literally try and drive me off the road (luckily not that often for the last one)

All I want is, to enjoy the sport I’m love, get fit and then spend the time with my family. Yet my wife has said to me, she is anxious when I’m out and follows me on find my iPhone, because she’s terrified someone will one day leave me for dead in a ditch.

Surely a two minute delay is not unreasonable? I don’t judge based on hobbies or backgrounds, why am I judged?

AIBU in thinking that those who state they hate cyclists clearly are either media influenced or just plain horrible people.

Apologies, this has turned into more of a rant than a AIBU, but I’m sure you get the gist.

OP posts:
Perplexed20 · 06/08/2025 19:10

We have both, on the whole all fine.

However, we are increasingly being used for races and...as a result we have cyclists going out in packs in between times and that can be irritating.

twistyizzy · 06/08/2025 19:10

pinkbackground · 06/08/2025 19:08

Let’s go with a nod then. It’s not difficult to do but I very rarely see it around here.

Thats a shame. I always make sure i smile, nod and thank all drivers. I've taught DD to do the same?

Radiatorvalves · 06/08/2025 19:10

OakAshRowan · 06/08/2025 18:45

The train isn't a viable option. There is no train station near my house or my workplace.

There is no direct bus, I would need to get two. This takes a minimum of 45 minutes but usually longer due to having to wait for the second bus. It can be over an hour.

I could drive but the nearest parking to my workplace is about a 15 minute walk away and it's not easy to find a space.

Cycling takes 25 minutes and is free.

Do you really think I should choose a less convenient, more expensive, more time consuming way to travel just to keep people like you happy?

I had a mammogram appointment yesterday at Kings in Denmark Hill, s London. Took me 20 mins on quiet roads to get there on my bike. Bus would have taken nearly an hour. Car nearly impossible as there’s no parking.

I’m in my 50s, I cycle boringly sensibly. I have helmet and lights but do wear Lycra on occasion. I obey every rule but do get cross with both Mamils and Deliveroo cyclists who ignore the rules.

The intolerance on this thread is deeply depressing.

herbaceous · 06/08/2025 19:09

And yes - cyclists are supposed to ride two-abreast, rather than single file, as it takes a shorter time for a car to overtake, and thus should in fact be easier.

pinkbackground · 06/08/2025 19:08

twistyizzy · 06/08/2025 19:06

Agree with a nod but like I said not always possible to wave.

Let’s go with a nod then. It’s not difficult to do but I very rarely see it around here.

herbaceous · 06/08/2025 19:08

I have another, half-baked, theory.

For many primates, being shown an arse is a sign of disrespect. Therefore, being shown lots of (lycra-clad) arses enrages the chimp brain, and causes visceral and irrational hatred.

As the chimp brain is more dominant in some half-witted motorists (probably the same ones who say 'cyclists don't even pay road tax) it makes for a dangerous mix.

pinkbackground · 06/08/2025 19:07

tumblingdowntherabbithole · 06/08/2025 19:06

Horse riders are supposed to ride side-by-side for their own safety.

A nod to say thank you for those of us respecting their safety and passing them respectfully would be nice.

FOJN · 06/08/2025 19:07

OakAshRowan · 06/08/2025 18:53

To be honest I think most drivers are respectful. I see a lot of hate on social media posts but, in my experience cycling to work in a major city for the last 5 years, I have had very few issues and only one near miss when a bus driver pulled out in front of me. If I felt unsafe I wouldn't cycle.

That's really good to hear. I think we should encourage cycling as a means of transport. There are arseholes out there for sure but I don't think they are a majority by any means.

tumblingdowntherabbithole · 06/08/2025 19:06

pinkbackground · 06/08/2025 19:01

Perhaps this is going against the grain on here but I find the cyclists around here to be reasonable and the horse riders to be, on the whole, arrogant. The cyclists often wave a thank you for carefully passing them. The horse riders, not all but most, ride side by side so passing them widely is impossible as they are already on the white line in the middle of the road. Despite slowing down and being carefully, I’d say that less than half of them ever offer a nod or wave to say thank you.

Horse riders are supposed to ride side-by-side for their own safety.

twistyizzy · 06/08/2025 19:06

pinkbackground · 06/08/2025 19:05

Therefore, a nod or a wave thank you for drivers going extremely slowly and being very careful when passing would be polite.

Agree with a nod but like I said not always possible to wave.

pinkbackground · 06/08/2025 19:05

twistyizzy · 06/08/2025 19:03

The highway code clearly says it is safest for riders to ride 2 abreast. It reduces risk of drivers not giving us enough room when they overtake.
Police also advise riders to ride 2 abreast too.

They should nod but not always possible to say thanks with a hand gesture if it's not safe to take hands off reins.

Edited

Therefore, a nod or a wave thank you for drivers going extremely slowly and being very careful when passing would be polite.

mintydoggyv · 06/08/2025 19:05

OakAshRowan · 06/08/2025 18:25

I cycle to work. I use cycle paths as much as possible but they don't exist for part of the route so what would you suggest I do?

That we are all road users and everyone gets home safely
So cars and cyclists should drive and cycle as to the road one is using so if there is a single lane we drivers need to wait to pass safely um , as l said we all use the roads

twistyizzy · 06/08/2025 19:04

LemondrizzleShark · 06/08/2025 19:03

I’ve driven in rural areas for 30 years, and have never seen anything like that. What are you doing in your car to make these horses so jumpy? Revving your engine at them? Beeping your horn and driving up their backsides?

Exactly

LemondrizzleShark · 06/08/2025 19:03

Gloriia · 06/08/2025 18:53

It doesn't bother me per se as I don't ride a horse I just witness the problems caused by many unexperienced riders trying to calm their spooked horses and it's no wonder so many come off.

Horses seem quite jumpy animals and the size they are makes it a real hazard for anyone nearby.

I’ve driven in rural areas for 30 years, and have never seen anything like that. What are you doing in your car to make these horses so jumpy? Revving your engine at them? Beeping your horn and driving up their backsides?

twistyizzy · 06/08/2025 19:03

pinkbackground · 06/08/2025 19:01

Perhaps this is going against the grain on here but I find the cyclists around here to be reasonable and the horse riders to be, on the whole, arrogant. The cyclists often wave a thank you for carefully passing them. The horse riders, not all but most, ride side by side so passing them widely is impossible as they are already on the white line in the middle of the road. Despite slowing down and being carefully, I’d say that less than half of them ever offer a nod or wave to say thank you.

The highway code clearly says it is safest for riders to ride 2 abreast. It reduces risk of drivers not giving us enough room when they overtake.
Police also advise riders to ride 2 abreast too.

They should nod but not always possible to say thanks with a hand gesture if it's not safe to take hands off reins.

Pedallleur · 06/08/2025 19:01

Gloriia · 06/08/2025 17:56

Both are justa hazard aren't they. Ride a horse in the woods and ride a bike on a cycle track. Neither should be on roads imo.

I don't hate either but they irritate me a lot.

But the roads were originally for horses, wagons etc. Cars are just another vehicle on them. The roads are not specifically for cars, lorries etc.

pinkbackground · 06/08/2025 19:01

Perhaps this is going against the grain on here but I find the cyclists around here to be reasonable and the horse riders to be, on the whole, arrogant. The cyclists often wave a thank you for carefully passing them. The horse riders, not all but most, ride side by side so passing them widely is impossible as they are already on the white line in the middle of the road. Despite slowing down and being carefully, I’d say that less than half of them ever offer a nod or wave to say thank you.

twistyizzy · 06/08/2025 19:00

user9064385631 · 06/08/2025 18:59

If you are wearing black you are really not as visible as you think you are, no matter how many lights.
Invest in some orange or pink hi-viz. that shows up so much better than yellow.

I think vulnerable road users, bikes, pedestrians, horses have a responsibility to make themselves seen, even if its not the coolest outfit!

All riders I know deck themselves and horses out like Christmas trees 🤣 many of us also wear cameras to capture the entitled twats who put our lives in danger

user9064385631 · 06/08/2025 18:59

RH1234 · 06/08/2025 18:09

I also ride with lights day and night, forgot to mention that, although I do wear black and my bikes black - maybe that’s the reason I’m hated even though lit like a Christmas tree.

If you are wearing black you are really not as visible as you think you are, no matter how many lights.
Invest in some orange or pink hi-viz. that shows up so much better than yellow.

I think vulnerable road users, bikes, pedestrians, horses have a responsibility to make themselves seen, even if its not the coolest outfit!

PorkPieForStarters · 06/08/2025 18:59

Adding another message of support for cyclists (and horse-riders)!

I'm full of admiration for people who cycle and I very rarely come across idiotic cyclists, yet I encounter horrendous drivers almost every time I'm out, whether I'm driving or walking.

The level of vitriol towards cyclists is disgusting and worrying. That's another person, someone's loved one, doing something peaceful that has such tiny impact on you in your car.

I now live somewhere rural with many narrow, winding roads and big hills. Cyclists cause me absolutely no issue and I am always able to overtake when safe. If it takes me a minute or two to wait, who cares. If I'm running late and didnt leave enough time for any sort of delay, it's my fault, not the cyclist's. Motorbikers, caravans and Sunday drivers cause a lot more problems and make for a far more stressful driving experience than cyclists do.

I do wish bikes had lights on at all times (though ideally not those ones brighter than the sun in my direct eyeline as I can't see a thing!) - it can be hard to see them in low light and dappled light, but that's my single very minor gripe and is as much for their safety as my peace of mind! Please tell your cyclist friends 🙂

LakieLady · 06/08/2025 18:58

I went for a walk at lunchtime. Relatively narrow pavement, wide residential road (30mph) but relatively quiet at that time. Cyclist (e bike too I think as fast) came up behind me on the pavement and shouted Excuse Me. I had no choice but to step into the road to let them pass!!

One section of my local high street is so narrow that it's one way traffic at a time, controlled by 3-phase traffic lights (a side road joins at the apex of a bend on the narrow stretch).

Cyclists regularly mount the pavement to avoid waiting for the lights to change. I was walking along the (narrow) pavement once when a cyclist flew round the bend and almost hit me. I stopped dead, and as he bumped down the kerb and into the road to avoid hitting me, he shouted "You cunt" at me, which I thought was a bit much!

Saladicious · 06/08/2025 18:58

I'm a cyclist and have hated the loathing for them, then I started horse riding again and was blown away by how ignorant drivers are around horses too.

I only go on the roads I absolutely have to, but goodness me drivers speed by, cut too close or cut up, and risk theirs, mine and my horse's lives regularly. It's a hundred times worse than when I rode a decade ago.

Why are drivers always in such an angry rush? I drive but I don't feel the need to do 50 in a 30 and 70 in a 50 all the bloody time.

OnARainyDay2012 · 06/08/2025 18:57

It's awful. I cycle with my daughter on my bike to take her to school. It's a distance of about 2 miles, quiet country road. I also cycle with a group of cyclists. Drivers can be so careless. There's no need for it. You will be able to pass in about a minute so please just be patient and don't put my life at risk for the sake of a few seconds extra on your journey!

Mischance · 06/08/2025 18:55

I live in a rural area. Cyclists really are a problem. They behave in a very dangerous (to them) way - it is terrifying because if I were to hit one whilst driving it would be my fault.

They hunt in packs - 10 or a dozen of them in a row on winding country lanes. They do not have the courtesy to pull in at a gateway even when there is a massive queue of traffic behind them.

I think that cyclists have an absolute right to ride on the roads, but with that comes the responsibility not to create unsafe situations.

I am the world's slowest driver and even I find it worrying.

Unfortunate4ly it is a daily occurrence rather than the exception.

As to horses - there are of course lots of those, but on the whole I find that their riders are courteous to other road users.

Simonjt · 06/08/2025 18:55

Gloriia · 06/08/2025 18:30

Not I'm just big on road safety.

In which case surely your biggest concern is cars being allowed on the roads, as they are the most dangerous ‘thing’ to use roads. Reducing speed limits and reducing cars would increase road safety hugely.