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AIBU?

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Original poster

to be annoyed that only women are expected to cuddle babies at work?

84 replies

pppaper · 23/07/2025 16:23

This keeps happening and it's really starting to wind me up.

When a new mum brings a baby into work (usually someone on maternity leave visiting), it's always the women who are expected to fuss over the baby. The baby gets brought right up to us, even if we’re clearly trying to get on with work or not engage. I’ve tried ignoring it, but they literally come over and stand right in front of me with the baby.

The men in the office? Nothing. No one brings the baby near them. No one expects them to hold it or coo over it. They just smile and carry on with their day and that’s totally fine. But if I don’t want to hold the baby, I get comments like "But you’ve got children of your own!" Yes I do, but that doesn’t mean I want to cuddle other people’s babies. Especially not at work.

I’m tired of this unspoken rule that women should automatically want to interact with babies just because we’re women. Men are allowed to just exist and not get involved. I want the same.

OP posts:
tuvamoodyson · 23/07/2025 17:01

Same as the others…’hello’ cluck under the chin, back to work. Job done.

marmite2025 · 23/07/2025 16:55

My male colleague had his nails painted by a 6yo that came into work (childcare issues)! He also produced sweets and a Nintendo switch so was more prepared than any of us

EternalNeau · 23/07/2025 16:52

DH loves a baby! He frequently sends pictures of him with a colleagues new baby. He works in a predominantly male environment but the blokes often bring their little ones in for a cwtch.

Boomer55 · 23/07/2025 16:47

I just gave the normal speech of "oh s/he's lovely" , and then went back to my desk.

FancyCatSlave · 23/07/2025 16:32

Not where I work, the men in my team love babies and are first in for a cuddle.
My Dean (male) didn’t want to give my DD back whereas my director (female) isn’t fussed.

RobertaFirmino · 23/07/2025 16:30

I always pretended to be on a call. Or left my desk and gone up to the third floor to see my friend in Accounts. I'm not great at hiding my disinterest so it was better just to bog off.

Brefugee · 23/07/2025 16:28

It never happens to me. But that may be because i say hi, say the baby is cute then i get back to work? Any suggestion that i do more, is - meh and i don't, unless colleague is a particular friend of mine, then I'll have a coffee with them.

Finteq · 23/07/2025 16:25

I'm always very awkward cos i dont wanna pick up the baby. So just stand there and try to leave situation if possible.

TimeForABreak4 · 23/07/2025 16:25

This never happens in my work. I like babies but im past the age of wanting to hold them unless they are family. When colleagues bring in their baby/new grandchild. Il go have a look, give the obligatory "so cute" "how are you etc" then go back to my desk.