To ask you for your best revenge ideas, real or imagined

This may be an urban myth, but I read of somebody ringing the speaking clock in New York, leaving the phone off the hook before quitting the house.

Tenant who removed the bath panel, placed a human poo in the void and put the bath panel back on.

Lots of good ideas. I would leave the weirdest looking doll I could find in terrible condition with his name on it.

But the thing people seem to get the absolute maddest about is when the ex or whoever did them wrong goes off and lives a nice life without seeming to give them a first thought ever again, much less a second. So I'm going to say Live long and prosper is peak revenge.

When I was fairly young, I lived in a multi residential property with a large communal garden. However, one resident was a massive bully and physically threatening. He had turned everything into lawn, despite pleas to have some flower beds and vegetable patches, plus a space to sit for everyone. He threatened anyone who wanted to actually sit outside and hiked our communal water bill with constantly watering the lawn, even during hosepipe bans. Since I felt unable to directly confront him, I started to pee on the lawn each night several times and reserved the most concentrated piddle very early in the morning for the place outside his flat. I also enlisted a couple of lovely neighbours with female dogs to help ‘water’ the garden. Yellow burnt patches started appearing. One night, another resident caught me and realised what I was doing. He laughed and then also started sprinkling the lawn. An underground resistance formed. After a while of this grassroots movement, most of the lawn started getting very damaged. The tenant’s association complained to the property management who came out to inspect the place and seeing the state of it, decreed it wasn’t kept properly, unsightly and then enforced new use of the communal garden with a large terrace, wildflower section, as well as allocating vegetable patches with no mono culture lawn allowed. We also had a small biotope pond. Someone suggested getting one of those water sprinkling sculptures, when one tenant proposed a little Mannekin Pis figures, all round hilarity ensured.

Should I be impressed, or terrified ?

😲😂🤷🏾‍♀️🏆.

Cucumbers too, absolutely awful stench

I chopped up a chicken breast into cubes and threw some of it behind the staff lockers in a bullying toxic workplace I was leaving . Apparently they got pest control in as they thought a rodent had died behind the lockers the smell was that bad 😂.

@BonfireToffeeIf your married you are entitled to a share of the house

Carrots smell worse 😁

Not read thread yet but I suppose everyone has already suggested the obvious Oldie but a Goodie ones?

• sprinkling seeds all over the carpets then watering them
• sewing prawns into the curtains

The urge for revenge is a normal human impulse, even so I think it's better to resist.

Argh, can’t find it now but love the poster suggesting an hidden Alexa, set to whisper during the night.

I was given the runaround by a buyer once and had planned a petty revenge of hiding an alarm clock in the house, set to go off at 4am every day.
@BumpyWinds
I did similar to this once to someone, but it wasn't revenge it was by accident.

We were staying in a holiday cottage abroad and, on our last day, had to get up VERY early to drive to the ferry terminal. This was in the days before smartphones so, to set an alarm for the morning, I used the digital alarm beside the bed. It was very loud when it woke us at 5am.

Unfortunately we were well on the way home before I remembered I had left it set to keep going off at that time. I felt sorry for the poor soul who would follow us in to that house and probably go to bed without noticing, maybe after a few glasses of wine, then be woken by that god awful racket at 5am

Itching powder on the loo roll is probably my favourite!!

This is genius!

holds hands up and admits that I filled my ex husbands favourite boots with a spicy african sauce called Shito. Brown oily stuff with a fish base that tastes better than it looks, but god does it make a mess.

A mate of mine was the one that left. He wouldn’t have a real Christmas tree, they had a really expensive, huge, pre-lit thing she hated. It came in two parts.
She went in the loft, and took the top half.
She left in March as well so it would have taken months, but the visual of him trying to put it together was a joy for us all when she shared it with us.

Leave some Nutella out as snacks.
invite some mice in.
Once they are in, the little bastards don’t want to leave.
This is personal experience, I wouldn’t wish it on any decent person, but on these offenders I’d pretty much invite a circus of mice, if this indeed exists.
And I’m not advocating bringing a dead one in, but if one happens to expire, put it behind a kick board in the kitchen.
I am still mentally scarred from what happened when I had one there, but you know, just for fantasy revenge purposes….

I screwed his best mate 😇

You have made my day, this is what I will do if husband ever cheats (not that i think he would) to remind him of all the time I have spent replacing the buttons on his coat or i could replace one button in each white shirt with a bright coloured one.

How about buying him some bull semen?
https://www.goodgifts.org/prize-bull-semen-1

Oh, and other things I've heard lately.

If you're leaving behind a microwave, take the plate!

In terms of revenge I have taken, I sent a particularly arsehole neighbour a confetti bomb after they'd kept the entire neighbourhood awake until 4am with an obnoxiously loud party! It came with options to show once opened and I chose "you suck!" 😂

I was given the runaround by a buyer once and had planned a petty revenge of hiding an alarm clock in the house, set to go off at 4am every day.

The only place I could think to hide it though would have likely upset my neighbour, who I liked, so I didn't end up doing it.

It was a young couple buying the house and they were first time buyers, so I'd bought them a bottle of champagne and a card. Needless to say, they weren't left the card and I thoroughly enjoyed the bottle myself on my first night in my new home!

These were not me but empty all the food out of the kitchen cupboards other than one tin of beans but don't leave a tin opener. Drive his car to an NCP place in a different town or airport parking garage. Friend drove he cheating husbands car to Manchester and left it there, cost him a fortune.