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Original poster

To be pissed off at neighbour coming into garden to retrieve footballs

36 replies

Confuseddotcom88 · 05/06/2025 22:05

Our neighbour has recently moved their football goal so it's now right next to our shared fence (only a short fence) this has meant they are constantly kicking their footballs over into our garden. This is a mild annoyance especially as I'm a little weary about it happening when DD (2yo) is it playing in case it were to hit her but whatever kids are gonna be kids and I can't tell them where to put their goal. Obviously whenever we notice a ball in our garden we toss it back over however yesterday I noticed a ball up at the top of the garden which I didn't go and throw back over as it was pissing it down and quite late on, this morning I noticed the same ball was now in a completely different place... Now I gave them the benefit of the doubt that perhaps it had been blown by the wind or something but had my suspicions so left the ball (again it was pissing it down all day and the kids would've been in school at this point anyway) and forgot about it, this evening I looked out and noticed not only had their ball gone but so has my toddlers. It's now very clear they have entered our garden to retrieve the ball multiple times and I'm pretty upset about it especially since they've never come and just asked for the ball back (I'm on mat leave and have been in the house the whole time) and they've now also taken our ball too.
This neighbour has recently moved in his girlfriend and her two kids (teen boys probably around 13 and 16ish) and has one child of his own who's not there full time (primary school aged) the younger boy has been round and asked us to throw ball back previously and I don't believe he is there currently so believe it to be one of the oldest boys who should definitely know better.
I'm I being unreasonable to be annoyed about this, it's not like we had had the ball hostage for days or anything like that! Planning to have DP go round to have a word after work tomorrow evening (as I'm heavily pregnant and would probably end up crying or something lol thanks hormones!) but wondering if I am being unreasonable to make a big deal of them coming into our garden or if we should just ask for our ball back and keep the peace (we don't really speak with this neighbour usually)?

OP posts:
Original poster
Confuseddotcom88 · 05/06/2025 22:36

BigFatBully · 05/06/2025 22:27

You are not being un-reasonable. It's your property and it sounds like they are taking liberties. I definitely think that a representative of your household should go around there and tell them to be careful not to throw the ball on to your property. You have a 2 year old for goodness sake, it could be very dangerous to have things flying over the fence. How are they getting on to your property do you think? Is there a gate through the fencing? If so, I'd recommend getting a lock and blocking off access points. They sound like a very dysfunctional family, so I wouldn't bank on getting much reason with them. If you can see the ball in your garden, the chances are the adults of that household can too and simply don't care. I'd recommend getting a higher fence put up ASAP.

Show quote history

There is a gate from our driveway into the garden which wasn't locked during these events since my dad had been doing some bits for us in the garden however I highly doubt they were even civilised enough to use that (it's quite squeaky and loud so I likely would have heard it), I suspect they just hopped over the fence as it's only a meter high at one point and thet have a storage box up against it so would be very easy to climb over (the idea of which makes me even more annoyed as they will be climbing into my borders where I'm trying to get my plants established!). The parents do act quite selfishly in other ways too (such as blocking our driveway when there's plenty of other parking available including their own driveway!) so I don't expect them to care much but I think they would at least have a word with the kids and it would make me feel better if we have been very clear.

OP posts:
PurpleRivers · 05/06/2025 22:30

Our NDNs children and ours collect balls without asking, its much more convenient than regular doorbell rings where we will obviously say yes go and get it.
Go and say about the toddlers ball though, it may be that their younger DC has the same ball and he mistook it for being that one.

BigFatBully · 05/06/2025 22:27

Confuseddotcom88 · 05/06/2025 22:05

Our neighbour has recently moved their football goal so it's now right next to our shared fence (only a short fence) this has meant they are constantly kicking their footballs over into our garden. This is a mild annoyance especially as I'm a little weary about it happening when DD (2yo) is it playing in case it were to hit her but whatever kids are gonna be kids and I can't tell them where to put their goal. Obviously whenever we notice a ball in our garden we toss it back over however yesterday I noticed a ball up at the top of the garden which I didn't go and throw back over as it was pissing it down and quite late on, this morning I noticed the same ball was now in a completely different place... Now I gave them the benefit of the doubt that perhaps it had been blown by the wind or something but had my suspicions so left the ball (again it was pissing it down all day and the kids would've been in school at this point anyway) and forgot about it, this evening I looked out and noticed not only had their ball gone but so has my toddlers. It's now very clear they have entered our garden to retrieve the ball multiple times and I'm pretty upset about it especially since they've never come and just asked for the ball back (I'm on mat leave and have been in the house the whole time) and they've now also taken our ball too.
This neighbour has recently moved in his girlfriend and her two kids (teen boys probably around 13 and 16ish) and has one child of his own who's not there full time (primary school aged) the younger boy has been round and asked us to throw ball back previously and I don't believe he is there currently so believe it to be one of the oldest boys who should definitely know better.
I'm I being unreasonable to be annoyed about this, it's not like we had had the ball hostage for days or anything like that! Planning to have DP go round to have a word after work tomorrow evening (as I'm heavily pregnant and would probably end up crying or something lol thanks hormones!) but wondering if I am being unreasonable to make a big deal of them coming into our garden or if we should just ask for our ball back and keep the peace (we don't really speak with this neighbour usually)?

You are not being un-reasonable. It's your property and it sounds like they are taking liberties. I definitely think that a representative of your household should go around there and tell them to be careful not to throw the ball on to your property. You have a 2 year old for goodness sake, it could be very dangerous to have things flying over the fence. How are they getting on to your property do you think? Is there a gate through the fencing? If so, I'd recommend getting a lock and blocking off access points. They sound like a very dysfunctional family, so I wouldn't bank on getting much reason with them. If you can see the ball in your garden, the chances are the adults of that household can too and simply don't care. I'd recommend getting a higher fence put up ASAP.

Original poster
Confuseddotcom88 · 05/06/2025 22:25

Bourneyesterday · 05/06/2025 22:20

Your DC will be older and wanting to play with balls before you know it. You'll be glad of neighbours who toss the balls back or encourage your children to just come round and get them themselves..

I have no issue with them playing football or with throwing the balls back or even with them knocking on our door to ask for them back, I have an issue with them coming into my property without permission to get the balls back and taking balls which aren't theirs! I'm not a child hating monster and I also had a childhood not too long ago where I would never have dreamed of going into neighbours garden without asking to get a ball back. The moving of the goal is a mild annoyance since it's now a constant thing but clearly not the point of my post

OP posts:
Plmnki · 05/06/2025 22:23

Put in a 2m fence. Sorted.

TheMeasure · 05/06/2025 22:20

I shouldn't have thought a trellis would be sturdy enough. One thwack from a football would wreck it.

Bourneyesterday · 05/06/2025 22:20

Your DC will be older and wanting to play with balls before you know it. You'll be glad of neighbours who toss the balls back or encourage your children to just come round and get them themselves..

Yellowpingu · 05/06/2025 22:20

‘Hi neighbour, as you can see I’m heavily pregnant and going out to the bottom of the garden and chucking balls back is getting beyond me at the moment. Plus when baby arrives there’ll be times when I won’t be able to answer the door when they come for the ball so it’s probably best all round if you can move the goal back to where it was previously. Thanks so much!’

Original poster
Confuseddotcom88 · 05/06/2025 22:16

takealettermsjones · 05/06/2025 22:09

YANBU for not wanting them to come into your garden, but I'd be wary of going round all guns blazing with only half a story, as you don't know for certain what happened to the balls. A polite word about maybe moving the goal back would probably be fine though. And I'd be getting a taller fence!

Thank you it's pretty clear what happened I think as two footballs don't just vanish from your garden especially after the earlier incident of it moving and I'm not suggesting we go and have a shouting match haha I'd just like a stern reminder that they do not have permission to come onto our property whenever they feel like it. We are planning to move in the not too distant future so didn't really want to spend money on a fence as there's nothing wrong with the current one though I'll be looking into adding a trellis or something to make it a bit taller.

OP posts:
murasaki · 05/06/2025 22:11

I can't see how anyone thinks you are unreasonable for not wanting them to climb into your garden, maybe those voters have voted against going round half cocked, as it were.

A polite word regarding moving the goal wouldn't be a bad thing though.

takealettermsjones · 05/06/2025 22:09

YANBU for not wanting them to come into your garden, but I'd be wary of going round all guns blazing with only half a story, as you don't know for certain what happened to the balls. A polite word about maybe moving the goal back would probably be fine though. And I'd be getting a taller fence!