New boyfriend won't dine out. Ever.

Yeah. No. Throw back. This behaviour won't be an isolated issue.

The fact he hasn't checked about Fosters is making me think he's just very rigid human being who has fixed ideas in his head and those people are NOT good to date. It is entirely possible that its autism, or an eating disorder - and we should be sensitive to those factors, but having one of those conditions means accepting that you will limit your dating pool, unfortunately. Hopefully he finds the right person for him, but he's not for you!

Dying to know what he says about Fosters and vegan restaurants, please let us know!

I'm not vegan but I love going to veggie/vegan food places so this would wind me up purely based on that, it's so much fun seeing what people can do without meat or dairy! (Thinking of vegan brownies here which IMO tend to be superior)

What a friend said to me, when I was at university and dating a vegan with a long fingernail and a squeaky voice, and bad trousers, though he was really very gorgeous:

“Is he any good in bed?”. The answer was no. She said that was the answer. So there you have it. Apply that final question to six tomato man.

As a vegetarian who is not fussed about eating out, don't like pub quizzes and also find it hard sitting through a film ar cinema I would still not date him because :

He is super rigid. Even if you don't like something (eating out, pub quiz, cinema) you can still make an effort for the other person to do these things every once in a while.
He wears the same black clothes all the time 🤢 and his kitchen is really dirty 🤮.

What does his brother's sexuality have to do with anything?!

What do you do about food on holiday or when travelling? At a wedding? Socialising at friends houses?

What is it he actually does like doing?

Don’t waste a second more of your time or energy trying to figure him out. He’s simply not worth it. And if the rest of his nonsense wasn’t a dealbreaker then the dirty kitchen would be. 🤮

I had an ex who only wore black and made ridiculous statements about what he would and wouldn’t do ( though to be fair- he would eat anywhere)

he was later diagnosed as autistic. It was just his way of being comfortable. We split up because for me, it was a very rigid way to live.

He may be a great guy, but do you want a lifetime of this? I wish I’d thought more about the small things when choosing a partner.

Get rid

To be fair, not everyone who is vegan is vegan because of concerns about animal welfare. A couple of my friends have gone vegan because they think it's a healthier diet and is more eco-friendly. They will eat vegan/plant-based food, but aren't bothered about what's in wine or whether things like crisps are 100% vegan. Wouldn't be bothered if their food was cooked in the same oven at the same time as chicken.

But this guy isn't just awkward about what he eats, he has a massive list of other things he won't do either - pub quizzes, holidays, cinema, change his clothes...

Come on, @Beautifulbouquet . You sound bright and fun to be with. You can do better.

Eating out is one of my favourite things to do. I don't think I would compromise on this so early in the relationship.

You're being just as flipping rude by referring to people who enjoy dining out as "stuffing their faces". Its perfectly possible to eat a meal out without "stuffing your face". Thats a very "shaming" comment which is ironic considering the rest of your post.

Lots of wine isn't vegan either.

Couldn’t be doing with this. Boring controlling git.

Not even a vegan restaurant? There are ones in most towns and cities now. I found a great one in Madrid.

He sounds like a barrel of laughs.

What a sad existence!
Cannot he go to a vegan restaurant at least? The food won't be 'contaminated' there. Depending where you live, if there are some vegan restaurants, at least that's something.

So basically, no meals out, no beach holidays, no cinema, and every time you stay in a hotel he's going to bring his own food?

No bloody way- he sounds miserable AF.

I have no issues with anyone being vegan and I myself dont drink alcohol but that doesnt mean you have to become a hermit and refuse to go out anywhere or do anything fun.

In the bin with him.

This would be a 100% deal breaker for me, I love dining out. Especially with my other half.

With your further updates, i can see that if you stay with this guy, you will end up being his carer. Some people enjoy that. You likely won't.

It sounds like something is not quite right with him and perhaps he can’t help that. But you are fundamentally incompatible, unless you wish to shrink your life down to fit in with him. I don’t see him offering much compromise.

in short: move on. Cold tofu sandwiches don’t need to be in anyone’s life.

This degree of paranoia around food is not normal. People with special dietary requirements can usually be catered for nowadays in most establishments. I can understand it's worrying for those with severe food allergies. This man as well as being vegan sounds like he has a severe eating disorder.

He sounds possibly autistic? Rigid thinking, difficulty with food, wearing the same clothes (with rules around colour), maybe he was unwilling to commit to a pub quiz as it wasn't what you planned? Hasn't been on holiday in 6 years (could be difficulty with change if it isn't money related?).
Does he have any intense interests (other than veganism) or have you noticed heightened sensitivities?
Either way it sounds like you are incompatible.

Do vegan women give blow jobs. Presumably they don't swallow.