Hairdressers. Why do you do it? Anyone else?

Imbeciles! I love it!

Finally at the age of 59 I’ve found a stylist that understands me and my hair. I’ve been seeing her for two years now, she cuts it her daughter does the colouring. It’s a village salon and the reason I didn’t go sooner was because it didn’t look trendy and a lot of O.A.Ps frequent it. She’s the first to actually understand my hair. I’ve wanted it similar to Anthea Turners, smooth on top with it flicking out at the back, finally I’ve got as near as you can, considering her hair is naturally curly and mine isn’t, it has bend and there’s lots of it. She tells me she may be retiring in a year, I’ve told her she can’t, what am I going to do, 😢

I know this is an old thread but it made me laugh. Years ago, in a place I no longer live, I had a hairdresser in an old-school backstreet salon with a pun in the name. There were always a row of old ladies in, having a comfy smoke. My hairdresser was variable, my straight hair was cut on the bias differently each time, depending on whether she had a cigarette on the go.

One day, I asked her to cut my shoulder-length hair shorter. She went at it enthusiastically and at the end I had this amazing cut, a long-ish bob with shaggy layers, with a retro '60s vibe which totally suited me. All my friends and colleagues complimented me on it. At my next cut, I came out with a straight, dull, straggly bob. We'd sometimes mention the Fabulous Cut in later years, she'd say, " 'Member that great cut ah did ye eh? Brilliant that was", and I'd go, "Yeah, it was great."

The truth is, they don't know what to do with thick, frizzy hair. I've got a wavy routine going now after internet research. Turns out straightening/blow drying the heck out of it isn't the only way to defeat frizz.

Caucasian women don't all have hair like Jennifer Aniston, but it's what we've been told we should have, and if we haven't, our only option is to work against it, try to force it into being something it isn't. Basically, make it something the stylist knows what to do with. To get my hair to look smooth, poker-straight, etc, it has to be bullied into it.

Textured, coarse hair like mine isn't that rare. Why don't stylists know what to do with it?

I did all that. Took a picture and everything. Also, she could see my hair type. Even if I hadn't told her I didn't want shorter layers and explained the effect on my hair, isn't it something she ought to know about?

I do understand the modern fashion has been poker-straight hair, and perhaps stylists aren't taught what to do with thick, coarse, 2B curl pattern hair, but I did tell her.

Anyway, it's a year and a half since that terrible cut I had, and I have found one who gets it more. I don't want to pretend my hair is straight. It isn't. I'm still disappointed that it's taken the internet to teach me how to care for my hair type, because not a single stylist has pointed me in the direction of the products I should be using beyond telling me it's thirsty/dry. Not one, not even the lovely lady I have now has pointed me in the direction of a wavy routine.

When I next go, I will ask her to use a diffuser, etc, but honestly, when I am paying for expertise, should I really have to show her how to style hair like mine?

Oh I just found this thread and it's so relatable. In my mid 40's I thought I would have had hair ticked off the "figured it out" list by now, but no. The latest in my series of disastrous cuts

• Woman in Rainbow rooms cutting in a blunt bob at just the wrong length for my very square jaw and a blunt fringe for my thick, frizzy hair with a cowlick = Lord Farquad
• I just want something to cover the grey in my naturally very dark brunette hair = "caramel" streaks that turned to ginger within a week

Thought I'll really put some effort in and try a top stylist at Tony and Guy - she "circle cut" it, which has basically left me with the shetland pony layers that others on here have described - like my fringe goes the whole way around my head, but she's also managed to take out all the volume underneath that. And colour it in such a way that it hasn't even covered my grey. So that's £160 down the drain

The only really good cut I had was at a Vidal Sassoon salon years ago - that woman could really cut hair, and it was totally tailored to flatter my face shape. She left the salon and I've never been able to find anyone as good.

And they also seem to be obsessed with putting in those straightening iron waves, which I'm convinced is just to cover up the terrible haircut underneath it all!

Im a hairdresser,

My tip is to tell them what you definitely DONT want, take pics, tell them what you hate, deffo no layering ect.

We aren't mind readers,

Long hair should never have thinning scissors anywhere near it, if she has layered the front then it does need slicing into, to soften the ends, however, she shouldn't have been doing that if you didn't want it…

Im fully booked 4 months ahead, as i listen to what clients say.

There are some of us out there !
Sorry you had a bad experience

I have different problems- my hair is very fine flyaway and thin. even when younger it was the same. My mother was always nagging for me to have it cut , coloured, permed. In my life I think I have been to the hairdresses 3 times (except for having a trim which I do twice a year) The three times once I had it cut, once I had it cut and once I had it permed. I was disappointed all three times the highlights were ok but nothing special both the cut and the perm were awful , so no I don't go to the hairdressers.

My hairdresser is peeved that I ask him to blowdry my hair rather than straighten it. If he straightens it I get 2 hours max and it just becomes lank and hanging and looks greasy. I end up washing it to liven it up. I don’t want a bouffanty blowdry just a bit of styling, my hair is low maintenance but no straightening by him (it’s ok when I straighten it, I don’t apply so much pressure), he over does it. I think straightening saves them time. It has made some of them lazy. We pay enough money for their services.

Very pleased for you! Keep hold of them!

Have had one brilliant hairdresser ever. A couple okay.

Honestly I think the issue is going to any random hairdresser with a days notice. My hairdresser is absolutely amazing, BUT he's booked up 2-3 months in advance and doesn't take on new clients. In my opinion any hairdressers with next day slots will be shit, sorry! Appreciate this is because of childcare, but if you have a partner or any family support could they help you?

BLUNT CUT. No texturising, no layers, no razor cutting. Friend with very thin hair had a wedding and the hairdresser savaged it so badly even they couldn’t style it on the day and kept using serum - it was a greasy mess by the end.

That’s what to ask for, I hate feathering too and I don’t think it looks particularly good on anybody unless you really have very thick hair and want it thinned and they leave longer lengths.
It’ll soon grow OP- 😢

My current hairdresser is brilliant. I let my hair grow out a bit recently and it was ok but darker (highlights needed doing) and it needed cutting. As soon as I had it cut and coloured I felt much better. Similar with SIL. She’d grown her thick dark brown hair long but it just hung there. She got a just below the shoulders blunt cut. She’s got 2 young kids so it’s easier to manage this way. And several women I know with kids in their late 30s have gone from long/shoulder length hair to bobs (the ones you can style with waves). It shows off their faces and eyes.

Once back in the day I was given the Rachel from Friends haircut. It was ok but I don’t really have her hair type and my hairdresser at the time persuaded me it was the in cut. Same hairdresser (man) didn’t blow dry my hair, said it was better for it to be rough dried and dry naturally. There was nothing at all wrong with my hair he was just being lazy.

Glad I am not alone. Have had one stand out brilliant hairdresser and about two okay ones.
I agree with the person upthread who says they seem to have become worse. You end up with the haircut they can do rather than the one you want. And what they can do is limited.

Newnameneededforthisone I coildny agree more !!! So hit and miss with my hairdresser … either amazing or wtf !!! Why just why whem he can cut it well dies he get distracted at times and mess up my hair ???? This time he seem yo take umbridge that covered up my highlights that had hone soo white and overprocessed . I ask im to just even out the colour what dud he fo …… dyed it dark brown !!!! Eeegh

Having front layers taken too far back was the absolute bane of my existence between about 1988-2004. If you asked for some layers at the front, hairdressers used to love cutting ALL the hair at the front right back to your ears. It was as if they were trying to make me look as un-sexy as possible.

Yes YES!!! That is exactly what I was just talking about.

The other thing that was impossible to avoid was that thing where they would cut some layers into the ends of collar length or shoulder length hair so that the hair went in in rounded bowl shape, then flicked up and out at the ends. It was so ubiquitous for about ten years, absolutely unavoidable unless you had a pixie cut. If you were over 35 and had any length on your hair at all you were getting those end flicks whether you liked it or not.

Then there were what I like to not-so-fondly remember as the Spaniel's Ears Years.

You'd ask for a gently inverted bob just to get some subtle shaping in at the back and and you'd come out with these annoying, razored little flappy bits over the ears, which were much longer than the rest of the bottom of the hair. and would catch the wind and flap around like floppy spaniels ears. Just awful.

I ended up going to two places - one for a cut and one for colour. I live in Southeast Asia where they rarely know how to cut my very curly Caucasian hair. I found a person who specializes in curly hair and I like her cuts. However, despite having very simple colouring needs (just cover my roots to hide my grey in my brown hair), it just doesn't go well (either too light so the grey isn't covered or almost black). I found a place that does the colouring well but doesn't know curly hair. It means an extra visit every 3ish month, but it's what I've had to resort to.

I have a had this exact thing, more than once. There was a period about 10 years ago, when it seemed every hairdresser could only cut my hair a certain way and that involved taking a huge, angled chunk out of one side of hair at the front. It didn't matter what I asked for, or what photo I showed them, this was what I always got. I think it was supposed to enable the hair to flick back in a nice swish but all mine ever did was hang annoyingly in my face. Too long to be a useful fringe, not long enough to tie up or tuck behind my ear. Too deep cut and disconnected to relate to the rest of the hair on my head. Impossible to blow dry into any acceptable shape. So fucking annoying and it always took ages to grow out.

I've had a classic, all one length bob for a while now and it's such a relief to not be constantly fighting with weird layers in weird places that I didn't ask for. I feel like I am never going to want to change my hairstyle ever again. It's too risky. 😫

I am European. I no longer have a hairstyle since in the UK. (England). Sorry, but that's the case. So I'm going to let it grow.

Beautiful curls!

Complain to the manager?
I know it's two and a half weeks ago but it's causing you distress.
Speak to the manager and tell her what you asked for and when she asks why you didn't mention it on the day, tell her your 4 months post birth and quite frankly you were shell shocked.
Manager needs to have a word with their staff and I think you should get your money back.

The trouble is, you don't always realise. I just had mine done after two years of hairdresser avoidance. I showed a picture, I said I wanted shaping round my face but no short layers overall. So she snips away, and then dries and straightens to death and it looks all right.
The style I asked for I have had before. It shouldn't need straightening at home, but I got some straighteners if I fancied doing it.

First wash since having it done yesterday and that's when I saw how short the layers were. Upshot is, I look like an old English sheepdog! Instead of just shaping round my face, she's made a layer as though she was giving me an angled bob. So what I have is basically two hairstyles. An angled bob top layer and the rest of my hair. It's awful. Fortunately, I can still put the angled bob bit up in a scrunchie, but the whole point of a fringe was to stop having to wear it up so much. At least the fringe is OK.

If you provide a photo and give clear instructions on how much you want cut off and they ignore your request, you are entitled to leave without paying and to give them a poor review on social media. If more people did this the bad hairdressers would soon be out of business or would need to buck up their ideas!

I have similar hair type to yours (mine's naturally wavy/curly - is yours?) and gave up with hairdressers a couple of years ago. I had everything from borderline rude comments about how "bushy" my hair is, to annoyance that it took longer than other clients, to people who genuinely tried quite hard to do a good job but just didn't know how to cut the texture.

Curly cuts from specialists were good but way too expensive for me.

I cut it myself now using the "double unicorn cut" method - its really quite easy, and looks good. Wouldn't work on straight hair though.