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Original poster

To be angry over a name

264 replies

Barbie46 · 22/01/2023 19:55

My baby is 6 months old and we named her a very uncommon name that was special to us. Recently we met an old friend of my husband's, they are still in the same circle but not close friends anymore. He asked us the usual questions about a new baby including her name. He and his partner had a baby in the last few days and called their baby our daughters name.
He did not mention anything about her name when we told them it and I am feeling irrationally angry that they have used our daughters name.

OP posts:
JustMarriedBecca · 22/01/2023 20:58

Trez1510 · 22/01/2023 20:51

In light of the popularity of Wren at the moment, there's some mileage in this.

Wrenlea
Wrenleah
Wrenlee
Wrenleagh
Wrenleay
Wrenleigh

PS I've copyrighted them all. Apply for a license to use @Trez1510 👍

I think Wrenlea is the name of my neighbours house.

EmilyGilmoresSass · 22/01/2023 20:57

Barbie46 · 22/01/2023 20:20

Her name is Renlea after her two grandmothers. Half of each name.

I'm astounded anybody else wanted to use that name

incywincyspidery · 22/01/2023 20:57

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 22/01/2023 20:47

This happened to me when I was trying to create an email account. In tbe end I had to add a number to the end.

It seems that it was not the first time this had happened, in fact I am number 87!

Could you do something similar to create a unique name?

Brilliant idea! Renlea87. No-one else will have that name at nursery 😂

AmyDudley · 22/01/2023 20:57

what a brilliant idea - I'm changing my name to Lilmar (and my son's name to Alwal)

Renlea · 22/01/2023 20:57

Charlize43 · 22/01/2023 20:49

Did you have it copyrighted? Seems unreasonable to be angry about it. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery that mediocrity can pay to greatness. - Oscar Wilde.

No but I did look....

Renlea©

Original poster
Barbie46 · 22/01/2023 20:57

AliceOlive · 22/01/2023 20:55

How did you find out? Yes, I’d be just as annoyed.

In a room full of mutual friends, "oh did you hear x and x had their baby and called her Renlea too ?"

OP posts:
chocolatesnaps · 22/01/2023 20:56

@Barbie46 I have complete sympathy. My cousin had a child two weeks after ours was born and used the same name. This name was not a family name and not popular at all. Names are special and sentimental and I reckon I'd have felt this way if it was a friend, as in your case.

Talkwhilstyouwalk · 22/01/2023 20:56

Take it as a compliment and move on.

Cocobutt · 22/01/2023 20:56

You cannot own a name.

I get feeling a bit put out if you think they copied you and you wanted your child to be unique but they may have had the name first and felt put out that you called your baby it first.

I grew up having at least 4 Sarah’s in my class and I really don’t think either child is going to care if someone has the same name as them.

AliceOlive · 22/01/2023 20:55

How did you find out? Yes, I’d be just as annoyed.

Wonnle · 22/01/2023 20:55

If only everyone had a different name to everyone else !

Original poster
Barbie46 · 22/01/2023 20:55

User98866 · 22/01/2023 20:54

That is a lovely name. Is it pronounced Ren-Leha or Ren-lee? Obviously it’s a genuinely unusual name (I thought you might say it was Ottilie or some other fairly commonly used name) in the U.K. They clearly copied it. But there’s not much you can do really but move on.

It's pronounced ren-leah. Grannies Renee and Leanne. But hey-ho !

OP posts:
PelvicFloorClenchReminder · 22/01/2023 20:55

I can't be the only one bitterly disappointed that it wasn't Davonz after Auntie Dave and Auntie Balonz.

User98866 · 22/01/2023 20:54

That is a lovely name. Is it pronounced Ren-Leha or Ren-lee? Obviously it’s a genuinely unusual name (I thought you might say it was Ottilie or some other fairly commonly used name) in the U.K. They clearly copied it. But there’s not much you can do really but move on.

JuneFromBethesda · 22/01/2023 20:53

Well done OP for taking it on the chin 🙂

Original poster
Barbie46 · 22/01/2023 20:52

Thanks for all your replies, even if some of them were brutal for my first post on Mumsnet. Guess here is not the place to rant, but I've definitely simmered down so thanks ☺️

OP posts:
DarkShade · 22/01/2023 20:51

It's absolutely fine to "copy" names from acquaintances, but I do actually think that you having made it up change things - did you tell them that you made it up and the reason behind it? Maybe they heard it from you, looked it up and liked it. I would feel weird in their place though if they come to learn how you got to it.

One of the nursery mums named her younger child a beautiful name I had never heard. I love it, as does DP. Aside from our own child's name, it's the only name we have ever both liked. If we have another boy, I'm pretty confident that we would use this name. I don't think there's anything wrong with that, even if me and nursery mum were friends. It's something like 3,500 in the 'popularity charts' so the mum would almost certainly know that I first heard it from her. You hear names from all sorts of places, including from other people. But I did look this name up, and it's an uncommon but old regional name. If it were something unique made from their family members and I knew this, I wouldn't use the name.

Trez1510 · 22/01/2023 20:51

In light of the popularity of Wren at the moment, there's some mileage in this.

Wrenlea
Wrenleah
Wrenlee
Wrenleagh
Wrenleay
Wrenleigh

PS I've copyrighted them all. Apply for a license to use @Trez1510 👍

Lachimolala · 22/01/2023 20:50

Could be worse, my cousin named his kid the same first name and middle name to my son.

Cousin on my dads side so same first, middle and surname.

No I don’t own the name blah blah blah, but I was absolutely fuming and two years on I still am. It’s weird and people constantly comment on it or take the piss.

dontgobaconmyheart · 22/01/2023 20:50

You can be as angry as you want OP but it changes nothing- so why bother. Ultimately how you frame it is your choice and it can still hold the same meaning that it did prior. You liked the sound of a baby name and so did they, oh well. They will have their own reasons for liking it which are just as valid to them and that is ultimately all that matters and all they have to justify.

Even hearing the name it doesn't sound like it's anything new. I used to teach and have known a Renley before (not my own class but a child in a split year group was called this) and whilst I don't care either way and don't condone taking the piss out of anyone's name, it was something that got made fun of in the same vein as all the other combination or 'unique' spelling names often did.

I myself changed my entire name as an adult I disliked it so much, it didn't make a shred of difference to me that my parents lovingly chose that or it was sentimental or anything else.

Charlize43 · 22/01/2023 20:49

Did you have it copyrighted? Seems unreasonable to be angry about it. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery that mediocrity can pay to greatness. - Oscar Wilde.

ARoughRide · 22/01/2023 20:49

Tiani4 · 22/01/2023 20:28

*yeah that's not even an existing name, I meant

It is! There’s one on FB & it’s a name on a census from the 40’s

www.ancestry.com/1940-census/usa/Oklahoma/Renlea-Baughman_3293c8

FlatWhiteExtraHot · 22/01/2023 20:48

MichelleScarn · 22/01/2023 19:58

Is it Balonz?

This wasn’t funny the first few thousand times 🙄.

oakleaffy · 22/01/2023 20:47

It's Xzayvian.

Stravaig · 22/01/2023 20:47

There are roughly 140 million births each year. Your precious bundle is far from unique. There will be some repetition of names.