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Pregnancy anxiety support thread

(187 Posts)
Kate3150 Thu 13-Jun-19 12:40:03

Hey,

I thought it would be nice to set up a group for those suffering with anxiety at whatever stage of pregnancy.
I’m approaching 14 weeks and my anxiety has been up and down, particularly as I had a loss last year.
I’m currently having therapy and trying to stay active. Eating and drinking well...

Any tips/thoughts/rants welcome. xx

anitagreen Thu 13-Jun-19 12:49:55

Hiya I'm 10 weeks and suffering with my anxiety atm mine seems to be a lot of negative random thoughts that I hate as they put me in a foul mood, but I'm trying to recognise them now as just thoughts and leaving them be and I do feel more cheerful, I think what bothers me is that my mind always feels full of unimportant lingering thoughts and I worry am I the only person who feels like that? Hope you are okay x

Kate3150 Thu 13-Jun-19 13:26:23

@anitagreen- Hey nice to meet you! Maybe we can help each other through this process? There’s loads of threads on here but haven’t found any specific to anxiety.
I went to see my midwife this morning and she said it’s sooooo common and tends to peak at beginning and later stages.
I think my problem is I want this baby soooooooo bad, I’m worrying unnecessarily!
I’m also having the thoughts which same as you, I’m trying to leave alone, it’s only when I fight them my anxiety increases. Is this your first? X

Puglover88 Thu 13-Jun-19 17:19:17

This is a great idea! I’m 25 weeks pregnant after a loss and my anxiety is horrendous at the moment! I’m convinced that somehow my baby is going to be born with some sort of defect due to a previous tfmr and my brain just keeps latching on to all the ways this could happen! I haven’t really mentioned anything to my midwives yet other then I’m feeling anxious, which they’ve said is normal, but I think I’ve gotten to the point where I need to seek out some professional help if I’m going to make it through the rest of this pregnancy in one piece! I wish I had some tips as I’d be following them myself - I’ve tried things like keeping busy, positive affirmations podcasts, yoga etc and it helps at times but when I’m at my worst, nothing helps!!

Kate3150 Thu 13-Jun-19 17:46:26

@Puglover88- welcome to the thread, nice to meet you 💜.
Anxiety is such a funny thing, we all have it and need it to let us know when we’re in danger. However, when it crosses that line it’s hard to get a grip of.
Great to hear you are doing lots of positive things to keep it at bay 😊. I’m guessing you’ve been wishing the time away like I am at the moment 😂? I’m so excited to get to 14 weeks on Sunday!!!
I’m having counselling at the moment, do you think that would be helpful?? I’m hoping this thread will also do some good as reassurance is key with anxiety. X

Missmonkeypenny Thu 13-Jun-19 18:01:42

Me please!

I suffer with anxiety anyway but I’m currently 10 weeks pregnant with an IVF baby and some days I completely tear myself apart, convincing myself it’s all going to go wrong. The midwife at my booking apt didn’t note it down because I’m not medicated for it...

Kate3150 Thu 13-Jun-19 18:08:36

@Missmonkeypenny- welcome my love 💜
Congratulations on your pregnancy!
I’ve come to the conclusion often anxiety is exasperated by us wanting the baby soooooo badly that it has an adverse effect on anxiety and increases it. So weird how our minds work!
I would strongly suggest you make a point again whether it be to your GP or call/arrange another midwife appt to say you’re suffering with anxiety. They should be able to arrange some therapy and keep a closer eye on you. It’s a very common condition but also very individual, so the right treatment needs to be established for everyone.
Have you found anything that helps slightly? Exercise? Meditation? X

Jenbo19 Thu 13-Jun-19 18:13:22

Hi!
I sympathise!
I’m 8 weeks and haven’t had a scan yet. I’m naturally a bit of a worrier too!
I’ve found the Calm app quite good if I feel a bit of racey heart.
Plus I’m a little overweight and feel guilty about it in case it effects baby. I put on a bit of weight in last 6 months while studying for exams!

Puglover88 Thu 13-Jun-19 18:41:13

@Kate3150 thanks! Yes I have been counting down the days and weeks. The time seems to be moving more quickly since my 20 week scan though so that’s a positive! I’m going to speak to my midwife tomorrow to see if I can get any CBT sessions in, I know they fast track pregnant women but it’s probably still quite a wait on the NHS - are you having sessions privately? Are they helping? So you’ll be in the 2nd trimester now then, that’s great! I felt like when I got to the 2nd trimester I was over one hurdle!

Puglover88 Thu 13-Jun-19 18:45:27

@Missmonkeypenny I can’t believe your midwife didn’t note it just because you’re not medicated for it! I know I could have quite easily been prescribed something by my doctor for my anxiety but I’d then be worrying about what effect the medicine might be having on the baby. There are other options like CBT that they could look into for you. I honestly think when it comes to mental health that it’s just down to the individual you deal with and how knowledgeable and empathetic they are towards it.

Kate3150 Thu 13-Jun-19 20:05:11

@Puglover88- yes I’m having the sessions privately as I started them before finding out I was expecting. It’s nice to have some space each week just to talk about how I’m feeling. I really like my therapist as well and , so will continue them as long as I need.
I’m feeling a bit odd this week. Had my scan on Tuesday and was on cloud 9... have felt a bit low last couple of days. I think it’s because I can’t stay in pregnancy bubble all the time lol, have to actually get on with normal life!!! It’s just so much to get you’re head around.... I mean having a baby is epic!!! I think this thread will be really helpful to lots of us 💜

anitagreen Thu 13-Jun-19 20:05:49

@Kate3150 Hey Kate no it's actually my third! And I don't really remember having bad anxiety with my others it seems to be easing now I'm 10 weeks but it's been so draining lots of what if, what ifs I'm going insane, what if I end up with depression this time it's been really stressful but now I'm seeing someone I feel a little more relaxed I'm hoping it tails off and it's just the hormones causing it. Is this your first?x

anitagreen Thu 13-Jun-19 20:08:14

Does anyone else get so scared that their is something wrong with them or that the anxiety will never ease and it'll be like this forever? That's my biggest worry x

Kate3150 Thu 13-Jun-19 20:08:35

@anitagreen- yes this is my first, so lots of new feelings both physically and emotionally to get through.
The “what ifs” are a nightmare and you just cannot reason with them.
I think a big step in conquering the anxiety is acknowledging that you have it. It can be scary having symptoms but not knowing what they are. We’ll all get through this together 💜💜💜

Kate3150 Thu 13-Jun-19 20:10:48

@anitagreen- following on from your last post. Irrational thoughts are a big part of anxiety and you will never have an answer for them. Just let them appear and don’t acknowledge them, as that’s what they feed on. Yes the thoughts aren’t nice, but they’re not real. X

anitagreen Thu 13-Jun-19 20:14:46

@Kate3150 congratulations it's awesome being a mum I love it. And that's a good way to see the thoughts I forgot all about that I've had some CBT before I was classed as " recovered" but I think I've had a lapse so I'm in that in between stage of knowing it'll pass but still freaking out on what's happening. The worst parts of anxiety for me is the randomness, the intrusive irrational thoughts, and the worrying. Hate those so much. It gives me comfort to know every single person in the world has anxiety it just doesn't need to be so extremesadx

Kate3150 Fri 14-Jun-19 08:16:40

How’s everyone doing today? Hope all slept well. Praying for the sun to come out today as that helps my mood immensely 💜

Puglover88 Fri 14-Jun-19 08:23:11

Yes I don’t think the weather is helping at the moment - it’s so dull! I actually slept well after about 3 nights of insomnia so I’m taking that as a win! 😂 Bring on the wknd!

Kate3150 Fri 14-Jun-19 09:33:32

@Puglover88- sorry to hear you’ve been suffering from insomnia 😢, how long have you had it for?
I also had a lush nights sleep, although think I’m getting a cold as feel pretty run down and getting palpitations 😡. Trying to stay calm but have booked in at the doctors for next week just incase 🤞🏻- anxiety is a fricking nightmare!!!!!! Xx

Kate3150 Sat 15-Jun-19 20:40:37

Had a mixed day today, I wonder if it’s the hormones? Has a great day then just felt panicky and emotional. Luckily I was on my
way home. So worried about the baby all the time sad xx

Lauraloop1516 Sat 15-Jun-19 20:42:31

Great idea for a thread. Early days for me - 7 weeks. First pregnancy and I'm just expecting everything to go wrong - obsessively checking the online miscarriage risk calculator everyday!

Kate3150 Sat 15-Jun-19 20:51:15

@Lauraloop1516- welcome, nice to get new members on here 😊.

Oh yes, I’ve been there. Toilet paper checking was my thing... also frequently on the MC odds checker.

I’ve been told there’s a stage you get to when you start to feel “confident” in the pregnancy, I am waiting for that.

I’m terrified my anxiety has already hurt bubs but then I think of all the women with actual stresses in their lives during pregnancy who have got through. I don’t think logically any babies would be born if they weren’t able to handle stress/anxiety

cloudy01 Sat 22-Jun-19 16:55:01

Hi all,

I'm about 8 weeks and really struggling with anxiety. Feeling anxious that it's very early days, feeling sick and actually wondering whether that's being caused by my anxiety because when I stop thinking about the pregnancy etc I feel much better and not sick...?
The baby wasn't 100% planned, although I'm in a steady relationship of 7 years and we had of course been planning this but hadn't made 100% of a decision... so I suppose I'm worried about how this will change our lives and what it's going to be like!! We are both excited and positive about the pregnancy but still a big life change! Oh I dunno !!

Nikki512 Sat 22-Jun-19 18:28:13

So glad I found this thread. New to the site and new to pregnancy anxiety (12 weeks) we lost our last in November at 7 weeks and my mind is on overload! Especially at night and the weekends when I’m off work I find my mind goes crazy! Just beating myself up all the time. So glad to know there’s support here x

Kate3150 Sat 22-Jun-19 18:30:06

@cloudy01- welcome my love! You are in the right place 💕
The hormones probably aren’t helping, are you an anxious person anyway?
The early weeks are always the WORST, I had literally no symptoms apart from being more hungry. In hindsight I wish I’d looked back and thought how lucky I was I didn’t have any but I just worried.
You will get through. I’m 15 weeks now and fingers crossed physically all good. Just working on my anxiety.
Have you met your midwife yet? Xx

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