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For the first time ever DH & DS went off to do the xmas food shop......I am still laughing...

(241 Posts)
Megglevache Mon 24-Dec-12 13:06:48

...his parting words
"don't look worried Mrs MLV...I got this" <<non festive black power salute gesture>>

he spent almost £300 <<faints>> <<#whatthehell>>

he bought amoungst other things
12 pack of kitchen roll
24 luxury toilet rolls- the type that are about 12 tog and will block up our feeble pipes
A partridge
8 different olives
Masses and masses of lemon jelly???
Premier Champagne (he's teetotal) I drink Cava
Popcorn (with sour cream and chives Heresy
the whole biscuit aisle
a farking Heston Blumenthrill cake (£25!!!???)
a crate of festive cheeses
8lb gammon
bike helmet
fancy bubble bath
posh candles (that smell)

Please share with me tales of bizarre shopping to take off the edge..grin

PS.. I am still laughing every time I open up the fridge...(which has hardly anything in it)

Megglevache Mon 24-Dec-12 13:29:36

Grendel- he doesn't drink grin

Megglevache Mon 24-Dec-12 13:30:54

Dorset knob...I think it's tiny hahahah
I love cauliflower though and butterbut sqaush- he bough 4 of those.

Megglevache Mon 24-Dec-12 13:31:30

Dumspiro- did he get what he wanted or did he give up?

ZenNudist Mon 24-Dec-12 13:35:14

Made me laugh. Loving the non controlling 'just go with it' attitude you got. You gotta laugh...

Megglevache Mon 24-Dec-12 13:35:25

I'm thinking he went off to get some TurkeyTwizzlers™ and came back to the wrong trolley but was too shy to wrestle the Henry VIII lookylikey who had our very boring trolley full of basics...

Just athought

SPsFanjoIsSantasLittleHoHoHo Mon 24-Dec-12 13:41:30

I'd mix the champagne with the Lemon Jelly.

Wear the bike helmet and make a bike from the roll of toilet paper.

Eat the biscuits while in the bath with the bubble bath and candles.

aftereight Mon 24-Dec-12 13:41:57

Oh thanks OP, I am crying laughing here grin

Please come and tell us what he classes as last 'minute essentials' when he arrives home smile

MammaTJ Mon 24-Dec-12 13:42:15

I went shopping for the first time in ages, not unsupervised, but with DP. I suggested something and the reply was 'That is why you are not allowed to do the shopping'.

I have done the classic male thing <gonna get flamed for being sexist> of being perceived at being useless at a task so the other one takes over and does it. grin

aftereight Mon 24-Dec-12 13:42:43

'"last minute essentials"

TessGoesDirectToBethlehem Mon 24-Dec-12 13:49:25

Meggle please report back on what his intentions for the truckload of lemon jelly are.


DumSpiroSperHoHoHo Mon 24-Dec-12 13:50:33

Yep, he got everything - wasn't too bad once they actually let the crowds in.

The daft thing is, he's a chef and had already ordered the stuff from his supplier at work but forgotten to bring it home!

At least we'll have loads of goodies for New Year too!

wannabedomesticgoddess Mon 24-Dec-12 13:51:05

How big of a crate of cheese are we talking?

MrsHoarder Mon 24-Dec-12 13:51:48

Rather hoping the last minute essentials include the pear tree grin

laurenamium Mon 24-Dec-12 13:53:22

Marking place to see what essentials he gets grin

BluelightsAndSirens Mon 24-Dec-12 14:00:16

Ah bless him, he must have got super market fever!

Glad you will just get on with it though and I can't wait to hear what the missed essentials Will be grin

TrillsCarolsOutOfTune Mon 24-Dec-12 14:00:19

DP and I went yesterday - I asked him "aren't you glad that I normally do this online?".

8 different kinds of olives sounds great though.

EarthMotherImNot Mon 24-Dec-12 14:10:04

I must confess I did an online shop which arrived yesterday and Dh and I have had a slight falling out because I bought what I thought was 2 swede and it turned out to be 2 kilos of the buggersblush.

Can he let it go? oh no, not him pfffffft

KeatsiePie Mon 24-Dec-12 14:11:45

"That'll be Dyoralite and a goat on a lead then" made me whimper with laughter.

I'm impressed that you're not mad, you sound like a lovely person to be with.

Megglevache Mon 24-Dec-12 14:20:33

he's not back home yet BUT he did ring to ask me if we had mayonaise and .trifle spong
(no shitting you)

Megglevache Mon 24-Dec-12 14:23:15

yes olives are delish especially chilli ones.

I'm actually a little bit of a control freak but I have some spuds and veg and am cooking the common as I type so we won't go hungry :-)

Megglevache Mon 24-Dec-12 14:24:23

*gammon not common....
although you never know grin

waltermittymistletoe Mon 24-Dec-12 14:25:43

Oh I love this!!!

GoldMyrrhAndNonsense Mon 24-Dec-12 14:25:48

Fabulous! Love your attitude too.

ginmakesitallok Mon 24-Dec-12 14:27:09

DP has just popped to Tesco to get some special beer for Santa and some nice cider for me (obviously the 10 bottles of wine we have aren't going to be enough hmm ) Can's wait to see what he comes back with.

SaraBellumHertz Mon 24-Dec-12 14:28:39

This is exactly what DH would do given half a chance!

I no longer let him shop since on a cottage rental week he kindly went off to do the food shop, spent the best part of £300 and we still had to get fish and chips for dinner as there wasn't anything I could make into a reasonable (and quick bearing in mind three tired and hungry kids!) meal.

As far as I far as I could see it went on artisan bread, posh cheese and chuttney, lovely wine and some handcrafted truffles!

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