Wedding guests

(347 Posts)
Neapwind Mon 25-Oct-21 19:32:28

My granddaughter is getting married and only has one female cousin. She is not inviting her to the wedding as she is only 11 and they want NO children there. This has hurt me and surely one little girl who thinks she is going to the wedding will be very upset. Asking her to be a flower girl would be wonderful.
Other peoples thoughts please.

OP’s posts: |
Twickerhun Mon 25-Oct-21 19:34:21

It’s up to her. Not me, not you. if she says no kids but this one is an exception where does it end? Are there cousins on his side too? Sorry -not your wedding.

AspCommie Mon 25-Oct-21 19:36:08

It's up to the bride and groom who they invite.

What about male children?

What if the bride and groom have friends children they're closer to? I'm not close to the children in my family but I am close to the friends of my children.

CanIGoHomeNowPlease Mon 25-Oct-21 19:36:11

It’s your granddaughters wedding and she can invite or not invite who she wants to her wedding.

Are you paying for it?

Cantstopthewaves Mon 25-Oct-21 19:36:19

My thought is to keep yours to yourself or risk a falling out.

Lookwhoseinsideagain Mon 25-Oct-21 19:36:52

Not your wedding- not your business

londonrach Mon 25-Oct-21 19:38:06

Not your wedding...only the bride and groom decides who comes. Yabvvvvvvu. Back off.


Hadjab Mon 25-Oct-21 19:38:08

There were kids galore at my wedding. One of my favourite memories is of a bunch of little kids all holding my train as we were dancing. That said, I’ve enjoyed many a wedding without my kids. At the end of the day, it’s up to the bride and groom as to how they want the wedding 🤷🏾‍♀️

Cuntness Mon 25-Oct-21 19:38:56

Don't blame her.

PyjamaFan Mon 25-Oct-21 19:40:56

Not your business!

NatriumChloride Mon 25-Oct-21 19:41:12

YABU. Not your wedding. Not your rules. Don’t get involved.

HouseOfFire Mon 25-Oct-21 19:42:19

is it your wedding?

Neapwind Mon 25-Oct-21 19:45:16

I am keeping quiet but still hurt.

OP’s posts: |
SummaLuvin Mon 25-Oct-21 19:47:08

11 is old enough to learn the world doesn't revolve around her. And you should learnt by your age, this is your granddaughters wedding, you shouldn't be trying to control it to suit your own desires.

TulipsTwoLips Mon 25-Oct-21 19:47:21

This is obviously upsetting you, but I'm not sure why you're hurt?

Disfordarkchocolate Mon 25-Oct-21 19:47:22

Not your wedding, not your business.

People shouldn't bring up their children to assume they are invited.

Bananarama21 Mon 25-Oct-21 19:48:14

Why it's just a cousin she wants no kids. Not only that you want her as a flower girl aswell

TopTabby Mon 25-Oct-21 19:48:37

Unfortunately it is up to her but I'd be upset as well.

Leeds2 Mon 25-Oct-21 19:49:43

I think you are right to acknowledge that it really isn't any of your business.
Does your granddaughter have any male cousins? Does her groom to be have any young cousins?

Terminallysleepdeprived Mon 25-Oct-21 19:50:35

Sorry @neapwind but as others have said, not your wedding so not your decision or place to comment.

Whoever told said 11 year old they would be attending needs to apologise.

When I married my exh we had a few kids, my godson and goddaughter were part of the bridal party. My Brownies attended and we walked out to a full colour party and the stairs out of the building lined by my girls (which was fan as I wasn't expecting so many to come). My sister had about 20 kids from 9 weeks to 6 at hers. I made each one a gift bag full of age appropriate activities, I was given a corner of the Reception room and set up an arts and crafts area along with giant snakes and ladders, an inflatable bowling alley etc which went down a storm (especially with the drunk rugby lads late on).

Having said that if dp and I get married then the only child attending will be my dd.

Movingsoon21 Mon 25-Oct-21 19:51:48

Why are you hurt OP? Some events just aren’t child-friendly and if there would be no other kids there then the 11 year old probably wouldn’t enjoy it anyway.

MiddleParking Mon 25-Oct-21 19:52:03

Asking her to be a flower girl would be wonderful.

Seems a bit of a remote possibility! Why does she think she’s going, who told her so?

AspCommie Mon 25-Oct-21 19:52:13


I am keeping quiet but still hurt.

Why are you hurt? It's not your wedding?

2pinkginsplease Mon 25-Oct-21 19:52:32

Bride and grooms decision, however I can never understand not inviting children related to the bride and groom to a wedding!

Very bizarre,

Crunchymum Mon 25-Oct-21 19:54:23

So the cousin is also your granddaughter?

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