Page 7 | To feel sad about my experience in London as an obese woman?

(163 Posts)
highhopes321 Sun 26-Sep-21 21:33:49

I am 29 and have gained about 5 stone in the last 3 years due to insulin resistant PCOS and genuinely eating too much. I am 14 stone 8 (5 foot 3) and carry it mainly in my stomach area. For instance Jeans that I buy are a size 18 and they fit comfortably around my middle but they're baggy on my legs.

Anyway, since I've gained this weight I have noticed I have became more or less invisible to the opposite sex bar a few particular men. I've accepted that, this is where I am at the moment, I need to either do something about it or accept it.

However, last time I was in London I was 9 stone 7. This time obviously I am 5 stone heavier and I have honestly never felt so invisible but also been met with such hostility and judgement in my life. I don't mean invisible in the sense that men don't check me out or give me attention, they don't - but that's not what I'm talking about. I mean proper disdain for my weight.

For instance I was at a club last night, I couldn't find the toilets and asked a man in passing where they were, he said 'do I look like I work here?' I've never experienced anything like that when I was slim. Me and my friend would try and speak to people and were met with curtness and treated as if we were social pirañas.

I had been standing at the bar for ages and all the slim, pretty girls were getting served before me. If anyone made eye contact I would smile and be met with a look of disgust or disdain.

I went to the ned for my lunch yesterday and the waitresses would stare at my stomach and serve me with a smirk on their face almost a 'what is she doing here' look. The people I was with also noticed this.

Today on the flight back I noticed a woman keep staring at me, when we made eye contact I smiled and she literally scowled at me.

I know I'm large, I know that but I have good hygiene, I make an effort with how I look, do my make up, wear clothes that I think look nice and I am comfortable in. I'm very friendly.

This has worn me down as I literally have left London feeling like complete shit. It really had spurred me on to lose some weight so I suppose that is a good thing.

Just wondering if anyone else has been through this and AIBU to let this effect me?

OP’s posts: |
MaenadsJustWannaHaveFun Wed 29-Sep-21 11:51:58

@GianaSister He soitainly is. But that's no reason for chippy buggers the world over not to channel him.wink

RobinPenguins Wed 29-Sep-21 11:57:00

GreyhoundG1rl

*Aren’t they like this with everyone in London?*
What a bloody stupid statement hmm

Disproving at once the Londoners are arsy stereotypes…grin

GreyhoundG1rl Wed 29-Sep-21 11:58:36

Are you from a very small village? This feeling of the big city being full of scary bogeymen must be quite disconcerting.

SweetBabyCheeses99 Wed 29-Sep-21 12:02:54

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

MaenadsJustWannaHaveFun Wed 29-Sep-21 12:05:26

Getting the glad eye from men being uppermost in all right-thinking women's minds, of course.

Bluntness100 Thu 30-Sep-21 07:06:26

MaenadsJustWannaHaveFun

Getting the glad eye from men being uppermost in all right-thinking women's minds, of course.

Cmon. There is nothing wrong with a young single woman going to a club and hoping for some male attention or to pull.

I’m sure it wasn’t her only or primary objective, although suspect it was one of them, and that’s totally normal and acceptable

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pelosi Thu 30-Sep-21 07:34:58

@RobinPenguins

Disproving at once the Londoners are arsy stereotypes…grin

How do you know she’s from London?

Even if she is, it doesn’t prove that Londoners are rude. We are allowed to object when people call our entire population rude and fat-shamers, as @Cactus1982 implied we are.

RobinPenguins Thu 30-Sep-21 07:50:51

pelosi

*@RobinPenguins*

Disproving at once the Londoners are arsy stereotypes…grin

How do you know she’s from London?

Even if she is, it doesn’t prove that Londoners are rude. We are allowed to object when people call our entire population rude and fat-shamers, as @Cactus1982 implied we are.

Oh Christ it was a joke. Add “taking things too seriously” to that London list wink

pelosi Thu 30-Sep-21 08:56:45

Aren’t jokes supposed to be funny?

MaenadsJustWannaHaveFun Thu 30-Sep-21 08:58:17

It was funny.

pelosi Thu 30-Sep-21 09:22:35

In your little head maybe.

Somethingsnappy Thu 30-Sep-21 10:52:49

I have a big head and it was quite funny to me too..... grin

pelosi Thu 30-Sep-21 11:33:07

Then crack on 🙄

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