CRINGE. Tales of teenage embarrassment to cheer me up...(147 Posts)
I'm currently on day three of a hospital stay and feeling pretty miserable about it so thought I'd start a thread to cheer me up.
Inspired by one of the things that make me laugh most - cringe moments from many years ago that you still feel, deep down in your very soul.
I'll go first so you know I'm not some lazy journo (nope, just a sick pissed off lady!) 🙂
NYE when I was about 19 - over at a guy's house I was sort of dating with a few of my and his mates. Let's call him Sam.
Sam gave us the tour of his house (lovely house), pointing out his mum's FAVOURITE african ornament that was on a shelf going up the stairs. How LOVELY!
Night was going well, all having fun. Me and my mate are in high spirits, being young and stupid, so for SOME REASON, start singing New York, New York by Sinatra and doing HIGH KICKS DOWN THE STAIRS.
Needless to say, I booted Sam's mum's favourite african ornament a good few feet in the air. It's head came off.
Did I own up? Did I bollocks. I 'hid' the statues head behind the statue, somehow hoping NO ONE WOULD NOTICE?
No one did, until the next morning.
We did not continue dating.
SO PLEASE - cheer me up. Tell me your shame from those oh so delicate and formative years!
I once accidentally left a used panty liner on end of the bath (next to the bog), for my male housemate to find.
I hope you’re feeling ok OP, and being looked after.
I was a shy teenager. I sneezed in a silent maths lesson. Everyone turned to look at me.
I farted. Loudly.
These are great!
I once boarded a coach in Lancashire, to go to a hair and beauty exhibition at Earls Court. We were the last to board and had to walk to the back to get a seat.
As I sat down, someone came over with a pair of my used knickers dangling from her finger... they’d fallen out of the leg of my trousers .
That was a long journey.
I attended one of those outdoor adventure camps when I was 14, thought that I was soooo cool and mature, and ended up asking one of the female camp counsellors out on the last day of camp. She rejected me (obviously), but wow what was I thinking.
I got really really drunk for the first time aged 17 in a shot drinking contest with a group of friends and partners. I chose Archers and I honestly thought I was doing well, until I got up and tried to walk. Me and my friend were absolutely wankered. Got to the home of my first serious boyfriend, (whose mum utterly hated me, thought I was low class scum because my parents lived on a council estate) covered in mud due to the number of times we fell over. We fell into the house, spreading mud and blood from scuffed knees onto the new cream carpet. Got up the stairs and I remember tumbling over a dining chair that was on their landing and breaking it like it was made of matchsticks. Next thing I remember is being in nothing but black underwear in his dad's arms, with him stroking my face and telling me to be good. He was lifting me back onto the bed after I stripped, then fell and knocked myself out on a bedside cabinet, gashing my eyebrow which he was mopping blood from and telling me to stop being such a drunken dick, I expect. I cried and said he was a pervert. Then threw up. My bfs mum was screaming that I was the cause of every bit of my bfs recent rebellion and I told her the problem was that her son liked fucking and she obviously wasn't ok with it.
Shameful inexperienced behaviour which quite obviously cemented her opinion of me, because when I broke up with her dear boy 3 years later, she was thrilled. His dad told the tale of the night with much laughter but she looked like she was sucking on vinegar soaked lemons every time.
I was around 16 and at my boyfriends house. Sat in the living room with all his family watching Saturday night TV. The stairs went up from the living room. They were all wooden and polished. I went up to the loo and on my descent down the polished stairway i slipped! I proceeded to clunk down the first few stairs, then out the side when the bannsiters are!
I ended up hanging out the side of the stairs arms dangling iver one banisters and my legs dangling down into the living room below me.
My boyfriend and his brother laughed so much I burst into tears until his mum coaxed me down and checked me over. Just bruised legs and elbows and ego
I found 4 drenched with blood tampons in my vagina after a two day clubbathon where I was obviously too drunk to take the last tampon out before putting the next one in!
Not really embarrassed more relieved that I didn’t get TSS!
Hope you feel better soon.
It was about 1994 and I was out on the town for the first time going to my first nightclub. I was wearing one of the teeny tiny baby doll dresses (that I would now call a nightie). The queue was really long and it was very cold, I suddenly realised I needed a wee. The club was adjacent to a pub so I decided to walk to the pub to use the toilet (past the long line of people waiting to get into the club).
Went to toilet, all was fine. Walked past the long line of people to get to the back of the queue, then I realised i’d left my purse in the toilet, so walked past the long line of people again to go and retrieve my purse from the toilet. I came back out and started the long journey to the back of the queue again and realised everyone in the long, long queue appeared to be laughing...at me. I’d only gone and left that stupid baby doll dress tucked in my knickers from the first trip to the toilet! Too drunk to realise at the time, not drunk enough to forget the embarrassment though!
I was once invited over to meet my boyfriends parents (I was about 17) and it was obviously a MASSIVE deal.. my mum was at work so couldn't drop me off, but because I didn't want to me rude I walked the two miles over in the absolute pouring rain!
I got there, looking like a drowned rat and his mum was lovely and said to go upstairs to the bathroom, get a towel and dry off.
There was a towel hanging on the radiator and I used it, cue orange and black makeup ALL over it.. I was absolutely mortified, took it off the rack to try and wash it to find it was actually a newly washed bath mat.
There was nothing I could do, it was obvious it was me but I just turned it around, sat through dinner and legged it afterwards.
It sounds insane now, but at 17 I was absolutely horrified.
Aged about 13 on holiday and met some lads from down south, I'm northern so we spent much time dissing each others accents. In particular the pronunciation of bastard. I said it should be bas-tard, they said bar-stard. Cue one of them telling me to say bar...only I misunderstood and baaa'd like a sheep. Loudly.
I was 17. My parents left me and my 14 year old brother home alone for the weekend, so obviously we had a secret party. I don’t remember much, but I distinctly remember the radiator somehow falling off the wall. That was a fun one to explain.
My Dad often regales the story of picking me up from the station. He couldn't see me then spotted a pile of rags on the floor (the story gets exaggerated every time he tells it) and realised it was his daughter. I was leaning on him all journey back, announced I would be sick, and star fished over the bonnet when I got out. He had to practically carry me up the stairs.
I was about 18/19 had been partying for 2 days. I was so drunk I was hallucinating. The taxi driver went to my door and told my dad I was talking to someone who wasn’t there and could he come and get me. Dad got me out the taxi and put me to bed.
Came in to check I was still alive a few hours later, and found me lying dead to the world, butt naked with a big pink vibrator in my hand.
I can’t remember any of this to this day, my mum told me the next day. Mortified wasn’t the word, couldn’t look at any of them for about a week.
I got very very drunk on vodka aged 17 staying at my dad's with my boyfriend.
Went to the toilet starker and went back into the wrong room and climbed into bed with my dad and his wife.
When I was 17 I started seeing a 28 year old. I was very naive and unworldly so when he suggested eating fish and chips in bed washed down with Jack Daniels I was well up for it. I desperately wanted to seem mature and cool!
I will never forget the moment I realised I was going to puke all of the fish, chips and whiskey in the bed, it happened so quickly there was no way I was going to make it to the bathroom.
So he cleaned me and the bed up and we went to sleep. We then woke up in the morning in a pool of blood on his white sheet. Fucking period!
I tried to clean it up but it spread everywhere so instead I said I was going to the toilet and I legged it 😂 funnily enough the relationship didn't last beyond the most horrendous 12 hours of my life.
I got my period unexpectedly and leaked on the rental car on a family holiday. I cried for about 10 days.
OMG. I'm loving this. Actually laughing out loud in my hospital bed. MORE! MORE!
Me and a friend always used to go to a nightclub, you had to be over 18, (we were 14/15) but about 50% of the the time we were let in. One night it was raining, so my mum offered to drop us off. We begged her to drop us around the corner but she took us to the door. The bouncer wouldn’t let us in. Cue my mum shouting out the window ‘you should let them in they are 15!’
My friend and I jumped into the back of the car while screaming drive. There was about 20 people outside. The shame.
As a young teen, i was walking to school, heavily laden with bags, PE kit etc. It was a longish walk and so I was delighted when my ex best friend's mum and dad pulled up alongside me in their car at the bottom of a big hill. I was a little surprised that they were alone in the car and was touched at their kindness in offering me a lift when they weren't even driving their own kids to school. I got in, said hello and buckled up but the car stayed stationary. Thinking perhaps they were waiting for me to get comfy, I announced that I was belted in and ready to go. Then I realised - they'd stopped for temporary traffic lights and weren't intending to offer me a lift at all . Bless them, they dropped me at school anyway!
I have many but...
Aged 14 I had been having very irregular periods for months, ranging between 2.5 weeks and 2 months apart. Some were really light and others were so heavy they left me feeling dizzy.
It was the first day back at school and I had started my period the day before and it was one of the heaviest I'd ever had. Was having to change my pads loads throughout the day...
End of the last lesson I realised it had leaked all over my (thankfully black) jeans and I had nothing to change into, so there wasn't anything I could do...
All sounds ok, right? I thought so - they're black, it'll be ok.
It wasn't. I then had to sit on a (not black) seat on the school bus... It ended up leaking onto that as well and it was extremely obvious.
No one ever did clean that seat and we had the same bus for ages.
Was car sick in a friends dads car. They bought a new car the next week
Another was when my boyfriend's then 9 year old sister walked in on us (then 16) having sex.
I guess serves us right for doing it in the daytime while she was next door.
I also got very very drunk when I was on holiday with my parents (also when I was 16) and apparently I started telling this couple we had met at the bar everything they could ever want to know about my private life... they struggled to look at me the next day as did my dad.
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