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AIBU about positing child's school report on Facebook?

(154 Posts)
Glitterlikeawinner Sat 06-Jul-19 14:56:43

Just that really! A mum from DS class has posted pictures of the full report on Facebook, bragging about child's amazing abilities and essentially how she is such a good parent to have a child exceeding expectations for her age. I get it, shes proud but not half a kick in the teeth for all the other parents in the class who's children have struggled for one reason or another, but still so proud of their children, rightly so.

JacquesHammer Sat 06-Jul-19 14:57:49

Notwithstanding the fact that posting a picture of the report is crass, YABU.

I get it, shes proud but not half a kick in the teeth for all the other parents in the class who's children have struggled for one reason or another, but still so proud of their children, rightly so

You all have the right to be proud of your children. Comparison is the thief of joy.

littlepaddypaws Sat 06-Jul-19 14:59:07

that's an awful lot for that dc to live up to, why do people do this ? i feel sorry for her ds, what happens if the next report isn't so top notch ?

PolkadotLollipop Sat 06-Jul-19 15:00:01

Those sorts of smug posts are annoying but YAB(a bit)U, her child’s success (and her pride in it) are nothing to do with how anyone else’s children are performing academically.

formerbabe Sat 06-Jul-19 15:03:27

I'd happily post that I was proud of them and they'd had a good report. I wouldn't post their actual report though because it feels like a breach of their privacy in a way.

Glitterlikeawinner Sat 06-Jul-19 15:05:11

Yeah meant to say, posting 'super proud of DS school report......' fine, I think it's posting a picture of the actual report and words that's got me a bit hmm

GinUp Sat 06-Jul-19 15:05:20

It's not something that I would choose to post myself but is it really any different to posting about a child's sporting success when other children may not be fast runners or strong swimmers?

Why do we celebrate sporting achievements but not academic ones?

GinUp Sat 06-Jul-19 15:06:22

Cross-posted.

No, posting the actual report would feel wrong to me too.

Nanny0gg Sat 06-Jul-19 15:07:16

Being proud is one thing but posting report is another.

Wonder what the authors of the report would think?

Glitterlikeawinner Sat 06-Jul-19 15:09:43

Yeah I don't think the teacher would be keen as it shows phrases they've cut and paste grin.

YouJustDoYou Sat 06-Jul-19 15:12:17

Crass.

WhiteWineAndMagnums Sat 06-Jul-19 15:14:10

FB is full of similar posts this time of year.

The best one was one I saw recently saying "Brilliant parents evening tonight, it should have been called the Archie appreciation society" hmm

StillCoughingandLaughing Sat 06-Jul-19 15:16:59

I disagree it’s a ‘kick in the teeth’ for other children - the child’s achievement is theirs alone, not something to mock other children with.

But I agree posting the report isn’t on. It’s pretentious and unfair on the child - he or she might not want it shared with all and sundry.

NoSauce Sat 06-Jul-19 15:17:38

She’s a twat. Nobody else cares. If she has family she wants to boast to then she could do it in a private group. Cringetastic.

Socksontheradiator Sat 06-Jul-19 15:18:12

I wouldn't. Amazes me how everyone has to share so much on social media.
But I'm old!
I also wonder how the children will feel about such things when they are older.

MyOpinionIsValid Sat 06-Jul-19 15:21:27

She's pleased and over excited. Hardly a 'kick in the teeth' for others is it? That's a complete over reaction

missyB1 Sat 06-Jul-19 15:21:41

Just embarrassing for the child and the parent that posted it! But the same sort of people post pictures of their child’s huge pile of presents under the Christmas tree, it’s competitive parenting - a modern scourge grin

ChicCroissant Sat 06-Jul-19 15:23:03

I don't think you should post the child's report as a photo, no, but I'd expect some proud words (wait until they get 3 or 4 a year in secondary!).

ballsdeep Sat 06-Jul-19 15:25:18

As a teacher I HATE this. I wrote the comments to the parents and I think it's so crass on social media

stillmoving Sat 06-Jul-19 15:27:27

There are several issues surrounding this, but I'm sorry 'a kick in the teeth' isn't one of them. Mum can be proud irrespective of how other kids have done. I don't agree with posting the report, but like I said, that's for other issues.

The idea that a parent should not show pride for fear of upsetting someone else is ridiculous. I have this issue within my family, one DC a high achiever and another who has to try very hard to get average results. Should I not be proud?

JacquesHammer Sat 06-Jul-19 15:27:43

I must admit one year I was sorely tempted because the handwriting was so utterly beautiful, it was like one of those entries on Buzzfeed “20 examples of handwriting so perfect you won’t believe it” grin

BazaarMum Sat 06-Jul-19 15:28:28

I’d just feel a bit sorry for the kid to be honest. What happens when he gets less than a good report? Or struggles with something? I bet those reports won’t get posted with pride.

That kind of public crowing about ability is such a hostage to fortune to kids.

LadyRannaldini Sat 06-Jul-19 15:29:30

If this is the first time she's done it, comment on FB that you're pleased to see such an improvement this year that she feels it's necessary to publish it, the others must have been pretty dire!

staydazzling Sat 06-Jul-19 15:30:07

i totally agree OP a final line between proud and smug

Orangecake123 Sat 06-Jul-19 15:30:55

Ah that's so cringey, but i'm not surprised.

BazaarMum Sat 06-Jul-19 15:30:58

I know literally no one that does this kind of thing. Do certain school cultures feed this boastful behaviour?

Orangecake123 Sat 06-Jul-19 15:32:42

@LadyRannaldini That's so brutal but so brilliant!

grin

saraclara Sat 06-Jul-19 15:40:24

I'm pretty sure that the teacher would be VERY unhappy about that. Are schools going to now have policies and rules to prevent this sort of thing? It's ridiculous

Goldmandra Sat 06-Jul-19 15:41:36

It seems to follow that the more you post on FB about how great your life is, the worse your quality of life is in reality.

I know someone who is always posting amazing things her wonderful boys have done. It looks idyllic and all her friends post "He's amazing Hun!" type responses. However, her lovely boys are well known bullies who have trashed her house to the point she doesn't try to mend things any more. She can't discipline them because she used to placate them to avoid tantrums when they were little and she's never regained any control.

They're rude and unpleasant, no childcare will take them, she's a classic CF and half our village cross the road to avoid her.

If you only went by her Facebook, you'd think she lived in paradise.

bingbongnoise Sat 06-Jul-19 15:44:08

YANBU. People crowing on FB about their precious kiddywinks 'achievements' really grinds my gears. One woman I know has a son who seems to have a 'best student of the week' award every 3 or 4 weeks. Bizarre.

I have had to unfollow about a dozen FB friends who are guilty of this. Ditto people blathering on about their grandkids, with shit like 'there is no love like the love between a grandma and a grandchild.' And 5-10 pics of the grandkids are posted 3 to 4 times a week.

BOOOOOOOOOORING!

user1494055864 Sat 06-Jul-19 15:45:13

I wish I knew mums on Facebook that would do this, as I'd love to see how much is copy and paste. I have had a paragraph about my daughter, followed by a paragraph with her friends name on it before, so I would be so interested in seeing other kids reports!!
Also a sentence about my other daughter, bringing things in for topics, which she hadn't done, so that was obviously on somebody else's report too!

BettyIsABoy Sat 06-Jul-19 15:46:52

I don't even get why people post that they've had a good school report. Because NOONE. ELSE. CARES.

And all the B.S. that it's to share with the family they don't get to see.... Share it in a private message if you must. But they probably don't care that much anyway!

TenAndFive Sat 06-Jul-19 15:46:57

YANBU - I don’t know why people find the need to share these things on FB, yes I know we are all proud of our children but the whole of FB just doesn’t need to see it.

The only people I share my children’s school report with and their achievements with, are my mum and their dad.

TenAndFive Sat 06-Jul-19 15:47:47

I don't even get why people post that they've had a good school report. Because NOONE. ELSE. CARES.

And all the B.S. that it's to share with the family they don't get to see.... Share it in a private message if you must. But they probably don't care that much anyway!

Exactly! it’s just embarrassing.

BatShite Sat 06-Jul-19 15:49:42

I hate smug posts like hat and would never do it myself. Though I don't think the 'feel bad for oher ids' thing is reasonable, some kids will always be better than other kids at some stuff. I think kids need to learn that others may be better than them at stuff and thats ok tbh. I don't really get this pretending everyone is utterly equal by hiding others achievements thing that seems popular at the moment, things like giving evreyone a medal for a race, as its 'unfair' to less sporty kids that they did not win, etc. Seems daft and pandering.

So YABU for reasoning I think. But YANBU for disliking smug type facebook posts.

akerman Sat 06-Jul-19 15:52:10

I haven't posted a report ever. I have done the smug posting of certificates because DS1 has always really struggled at school, and several people either made really unkind remarks or smiled sympathetically. He's actually really bright, but not academic, so I post stuff that serves as a corrective to how he's been perceived. I do feel a bit conflicted though . . .

BatShite Sat 06-Jul-19 15:52:35

It seems to follow that the more you post on FB about how great your life is, the worse your quality of life is in reality.

I also agree with this.

Basically, happy people do not need to post endless statuses and selfies of them being happy. Those who do so, are unlikely to actually be happy, but are pretending to be something they are not. A few on my list constantly update with how great their husbands are for example, yet I know that they are abusive shits and the women are often in tears over their treatment. I would obviously never say anything on the status and 'out' them, but..it seems a common thing. Not just with abuse but 'my life is great!' posts in general.

Bluetrews25 Sat 06-Jul-19 15:52:59

Sheesh. I never even showed my DCs reports to family, never mind my 10536 closest friends.....
I'd love it if someone else posted an identical one, from the same class.
After all, it must be massively difficult for the teachers to say 'doing ok, on track' in 30 different sets of words. grin

Hedgehogblues Sat 06-Jul-19 15:57:10

Stop comparing your children to other people's children

akerman Sat 06-Jul-19 15:57:34

Quite often I am genuinely pleased to see proud posts about children though, especially if I know the family has had a hard time. And actually I even quite enjoy ranting about the smug families as well. Maybe I'm just too invested in FB . . .

presumedinnocence Sat 06-Jul-19 16:00:09

Even brief comments 'So proud of DC's amazing report!' make me cringe.

From my experience, unless there are serious issues, most teachers seem to give children universally amazing reports these days, both state and private. Perhaps these parents don't realise that!

bingbongnoise Sat 06-Jul-19 16:02:16

@Glitterlikeawinner

Yeah meant to say, posting 'super proud of DS school report......' fine, I think it's posting a picture of the actual report and words that's got me a bit. hmm

LOL, as a pp said upthread, wouldn't it be funny if all the 'amazing words' about her precious boy had been written about every child??? grin

I remember some particularly nice, flattering words being written about DD some 10 years back when she was at school. 'Lily is a lovely friendly child who interacts very well with teachers, and other students. She is resourceful, hard-working, quiet when it's required, chatty when it's required, and always does well in tests.'

She compared her report with 7 or 8 classmates at lunchtime, and every one of them had exactly the same paragraph/same wording.

Very sloppy! grin

It seems to follow that the more you post on FB about how great your life is, the worse your quality of life is in reality.

OMG this! ^ I have lost count of the amount of times I have seen a woman majorly gushing about her 'perf hubster' with loads of cheesy messages on FB about him, then 12 months later they've spilt up.

Also, I have known quite a few women who moan constantly about their abusive, gambling, womanising cocklodger of a DH, and are in tears about how shit he is, and how she is always struggling on her own; yet on FB, she is constantly posting messages about how amazing her marriage, and her life is! WTF? confused

RedRep Sat 06-Jul-19 16:04:12

She’s a complete twat for posting it on Facebook but you’re stupid for even reacting to it.

Lovemusic33 Sat 06-Jul-19 16:06:28

It’s a bit cringeworthy but it’s ok to be proud. I often post about my dd’s especially dd1 because she works so hard despite being bullied every day by little shits. Facebook is a place for people to brag wether it’s about their kids, their husband or their pets. I think if a child does well then there’s nothing wrong in sharing how proud you are, wether it’s doing great academically or scoring a goal at a football match.

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend Sat 06-Jul-19 16:08:42

Each to their own, YABU, if you don’t like it, removed her, she’s better off not having an”friend” like you.

I have 2 high achieving sons, I couldn’t care less if their peers are doing better or as not as high achieving as them.

“The kick in the teeth” is confused so you can only post if your children are just scraping by hmm

VenusTiger Sat 06-Jul-19 16:08:49

I can’t stand showboating like this. It’s crass. So I ignore (and scoff) at “friends’” posts like this. That’s it really. Don’t care. All parents know it’s impossible to compare your children. Maybe she was sharing it with her family?

Witchend Sat 06-Jul-19 16:09:51

Thing is with posting the whole report you may be able to see what the teacher actually meant rather what the parent thinks they meant. grin

Speaking of the children, they have both continued to amaze us. We have to admit to being slightly disappointed at Zephaniah’s last parents’ evening that the staff didn’t stand up to applaud when we arrived. If you had seen his last report, you would understand why we felt this was appropriate. Anyway his teacher (who doesn’t always seem to get his brilliance) managed to say that she’d never taught a child like him and that he brought something unique to the classroom.
I did a joke Christmas letter with the above paragraph in. Most of that has come from a couple of deluded parents on fb. grin

Myheartbelongsto Sat 06-Jul-19 16:11:33

It's a bit cringey but hardly a kick in the teeth.

If your child didn't get a good report I'd be thinking about that more and working out how to make it better. That is not meant to be as bitchy as it reads op.

PicaK Sat 06-Jul-19 16:11:36

I'd only really judge based on how she acts if other people post stuff like this. If she's one of the first going "Yay! " for other people then fair enough imo.
You just never know what's going on in other people's lives and why celebrating a good thing is so important to them.

Yeahsurewhatever Sat 06-Jul-19 16:15:54

She's super crass to post it
That's v cringe

But it's not about you. Her kid being good doesn't mean yours isn't. If you're comparing your child or their report that's your problem.

GirlFliesHome Sat 06-Jul-19 16:16:26

It is a massive breach of the child's privacy. The child has the right to his or her school report being private because at the end of the day it is their report - noone elses- certainly not their mother's.

WorraLiberty Sat 06-Jul-19 16:19:32

As much as no parent has the right imo to start publishing personal school reports, it does annoy me that parents are supposed to think about how other parents feel about these things.

If other parents feel 'kicked in the teeth' that's a shame but it's something they'll have to learn to live with and that goes for everything.

Someone posts pics of their holiday? = Kick in the teeth for those who can't afford one.

Someone posts pics of them after passing their driving test? = Kick in the teeth for someone whose just failed theirs.

Someone updates their status to say they've just got a new job? = Kick in the teeth to someone whose just failed an interview.

The list is absolutely endless, therefore the onus is on people to deal with it or come off of social media I'm afraid.

bingbongnoise Sat 06-Jul-19 16:20:53

Agree with @WorraLiberty (at 16.19.)

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend Sat 06-Jul-19 16:31:51

Your assuming it’s been done without the child’s permission Girlsflies.

It could be absolutely the child’s wishes for their report to go on FB.

The generalisation on this thread is somewhat hmm

Agree with Worra

ThumbWitchesAbroad Sat 06-Jul-19 16:35:33

I think it's ok to say how proud you are of your child's report on SM if that's the way you are inclined (I'm not) but I agree that it's off to post the actual report.

Apart from anything else, it's not YOUR report, it's your CHILD's, so you're kind of infringing on their personal stuff. Yes it's for your eyes, but it's about your child. I wouldn't do it.

And I wouldn't do it anyway because I don't think it's very fair to boast about how well your child is doing, especially if you have friends who you know will see it, whose children aren't doing so well for whatever reasons.

MitziK Sat 06-Jul-19 16:37:42

Hopefully, the other 29 parents don't reply with photos of their children's reports, where it can be seen that they also say essentially the same thing.

Reports often have certain phrases that are allowed and ones that aren't - and whilst working towards x level might be replaced with exceeding x level, etc, the general comments could well be applicable to almost the entire class/year/school.

that25cUKHeatwaveof2019 Sat 06-Jul-19 16:38:27

* but not half a kick in the teeth for all the other parents in the class who's children have struggled for one reason or another,*

How much do I hate that competitive parenting.

She's happy, she's proud of her child, good for her. Maybe her kid really is amazing, maybe he's perfectly average child but she feels very proud anyway. Maybe she is naive, but at least the child is loved.

Some people also have genuine friends and family who happen to be interested by the results.

If you are not, scroll down and don't become friend on social media with people you dislike, you will fee a lot lighter.

Glitterlikeawinner Sat 06-Jul-19 16:40:22

Kick in the teeth probably the wrong term of phrase. I guess reading my DC report I was so proud, you then read someone else's and naturally you compare and think, why didn't the teacher say that about my child....maybe I'm BU to think that way and fully anticipate you all to say so! grin

I guess what I was getting at was that the details should be kept private? Ok so you go on holiday, great, but you dont tend to brag and say you spent £10,000 on said holiday because that would braggy and unnecessary hmm.

Fine, post to say you're proud of your child for whatever achievements, I just dont think everyone on FB needs to see the details of school report.....

ValleyoftheHorses Sat 06-Jul-19 16:43:09

One of the mums in DS class did this. It was interesting to see that the teacher had put that her DD was “a credit to the x family”.
DS’s said he was “a credit to the horses family”. I wonder how many times that was usedgrin

Glitterlikeawinner Sat 06-Jul-19 16:43:10

Just to add the child is 6 hmm

MitziK Sat 06-Jul-19 16:43:54

Mind you, I generally thought to myself upon receipt of the reports 'Who is this Angel Child and what happens to her 3 seconds prior to the version I get stumbles out of the classroom door?'.

It's somewhat different to my school reports, where they said what I did well and what I didn't.

Hippee Sat 06-Jul-19 16:45:51

Public crowing is always a slightly dangerous thing to do, as things can change. One of my friends used to post her son's reports with comments like "DS - practically perfect in every way" - she's gone very quiet recently! It can be a lot of pressure on the kids.

Ambydex Sat 06-Jul-19 16:45:53

The deal in our family is that the child and the parents get to read the report. Even the siblings don't read each other's reports. It's such a breach of privacy to post it online.

I also feel it's not fair on the teachers to put the comments out there in the public realm. I would hope they do use cut and paste tbh - they have 30 to write every year and loads of children will be hardworking and polite with a small/large (delete as appropriate) group of friends.

I don't mind the odd parental post about Annabelle's merit in Grade 2 triangle, though repeat offenders get very very dull over time.

that25cUKHeatwaveof2019 Sat 06-Jul-19 16:47:29

Just to add the child is 6

even more reasons to be proud. It's still innocent at that age.
"everyone on FB" means only your close one for most of us - and people are allowed to ignore the post, that's the whole point of FB.

naturally you compare and think, why didn't the teacher say that about my child.... that's what your problem is, not the respect of the child's privacy.

OP, to be honest, in this country ALL the kids have glowing reports at that age, it's neither politically correct nor fashionable to put anything negative. Most parents know that, so it's pretty safe to be proud of your kids , same way you would be proud for running a race, even if they don't win it. I think it's cute when parents are all excited about good news

MarieIVanArkleStinks Sat 06-Jul-19 16:49:39

No one could ever blame someone for feeling pleased and proud of their children when they achieve well.

But no one likes a boaster.

JacquesHammer Sat 06-Jul-19 16:50:11

Public crowing is always a slightly dangerous thing to do, as things can change

I know someone who did this, even referencing my child. She really came a cropper very publicly.

Her poor child.

SadOtter Sat 06-Jul-19 16:58:23

I haven't got DDs report yet but I may post a photo of part of it, I won't do the whole report but might post the bit of general comments where it says about behaviour, attitude etc and the bit where DD writes her own comments.

It has been a very difficult couple of years, DD changed school in September and her new school have gone way above and beyond to get DD back to the beautiful, happy child she was before the old school and their catalogue of monumental fuck ups. I think having helped me out when DD was at her suicidal, school refusing worst most of my facebook friends would like to see how far she has come.

that25cUKHeatwaveof2019 Sat 06-Jul-19 16:59:06

But no one likes a boaster.

but what will be a simple post for some people will be called boasting by others. It has not much to do with your post, but more with who is reading it!

Kashali Sat 06-Jul-19 17:01:26

I tell/ told my kids I was proud of them, I don't need fb to tell them.
Nobody else gives a fuck about how proud I am, why should they.

Redcrayons Sat 06-Jul-19 17:02:04

Having twins I realised pretty early on that teachers use the same stock phrases on the reports. Don't primary school teachers always say nice stuff on reports?
My DCs would hate it and I feel it's too much pressure, what happens when they move to secondary and it's not all sunshine and roses?
Strangest thing I ever saw was 'so proud that X got into <local over subscribed school>' with loads of 'she deserves it' 'she's so great' comments. Yeah, well done X, your parents bought a house in the catchment area.

Whoops75 Sat 06-Jul-19 17:03:18

My American cousin does this.
I think it’s v strange.

BenWillbondsPants Sat 06-Jul-19 17:03:55

I have absolutely no idea why anyone would post photos of a school report on Facebook.

I am incredibly proud of my kids - the fact that I don't post this kind of thing on FB does not mean that I am not, it just seems that a parent being proud of them isn't good enough for some people. They want all the likes and comments from other people. I really don't get that at all.

that25cUKHeatwaveof2019 Sat 06-Jul-19 17:14:13

Meh, it's like parents posting the "diploma" they get when they "graduate" from preschool, saying how proud they are.
Of course it means absolutely nothing, that's hardly the point Family and some friends like to seeing the pics, who really care that it's not a real diploma? It's obvious enough that there's no need to mention it.

MarieIVanArkleStinks Sat 06-Jul-19 17:17:59

but what will be a simple post for some people will be called boasting by others. It has not much to do with your post, but more with who is reading it!

Exactly. It will. Because most parents know that children's developmental progress will vary wildly as they through the education system. Ergo, even if they're top of the class in every respect at age 6, they may well not sustain that 'position' if other children who are perhaps later developers overtake them as they also progress. Likewise, some who are brilliant in maths will later develop their strengths in reading and writing, or vice versa.

Judging by playground talk I've heard, most parents likely think of their own child as bright, gifted and talented. This won't be the case as many times as parents profess it to be. The law of averages exists for a reason. I feel sympathy for any DCs whose parents place an inflated level of expectation on them, or are disappointed because their Y5 report fails to live up to the promise shown at the Reception stage.

Then again, this daft competitive parenting thing is something I never could compute.

ChesterDrawsDoesntExist Sat 06-Jul-19 17:18:48

Posting the report is a bit... eye-rolley but someone's kid doing well isn't anything to do with how your child has done. If someone is super proud of their kids glowing report then bloody good for them. Well done to that child.

herculepoirot2 Sat 06-Jul-19 17:20:54

Bit boastful, but she can post it if she wants.

Haffiana Sat 06-Jul-19 17:24:45

Meh. Comparison is the thief of joy.

No-one can kick you in the teeth unless you open your mouth to let them.

SmileEachDay Sat 06-Jul-19 17:25:03

Given that AREs are largely made of moonshine and nonsense and differ wildly across schools, I don’t know how reliable a measure they are anyway...

Grammar Sat 06-Jul-19 17:28:10

I don't get this, I'm not on social media apart from this site.
Is Fb different, I mean, would you post child's school report on mumsnet?
Private pride, shared with loved ones, should be enough, either I'm getting it wrong, or it isn't, which is a devastating indictment of our society today. FGS

Kanga83 Sat 06-Jul-19 17:30:07

It's for stuff like that this that FB should have an eye roll option that when pressed on fires out a 'buullllllshhhhiiiittttttttt' a bit like the 'congratulations' but in reverse. The 'humble braggers' do my head in.

BenWillbondsPants Sat 06-Jul-19 17:30:43

Private pride, shared with loved ones, should be enough, either I'm getting it wrong, or it isn't, which is a devastating indictment of our society today. FGS

I absolutely agree. That really doesn't seem to be enough for some people.

Benjispruce Sat 06-Jul-19 17:30:51

Nobody else is interested apart from immediate family so she is being a show-off imo.

Benjispruce Sat 06-Jul-19 17:32:12

It needs to go into Room 101 along with:
You alright hun?
Checking in to hospital but don't want to talk about it
Checking in anywhere-nobody is interested
Facebook in general

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Sat 06-Jul-19 17:33:23

Perhaps schools will stop giving written reports of how a child is doing? Perhaps they should? I find it cringey because as a parent it's a bit much to be preening and crowing over your child's achievements as if they're yours. They're not. They just aren't and basking in reflected glory is irksome for most.

The more that parents post reports, the fewer brakes they engage, then the more likely it is that parents' evening will be given verbally rather than in writing, that might stop them. It must be really annoying if you're a teacher.

JacquesHammer Sat 06-Jul-19 17:33:34

Checking in anywhere-nobody is interested

I don’t quite agree on this one. Well, I accept that people might not be interested, I might check in if I’m in a small independent cafe for example - free publicity smile (I also review etc).

Benjispruce Sat 06-Jul-19 17:34:40

Will these parents start filming parents evenings next? Really not fair on teachers as those comments are private and confidential. It could cause real problems if other parents in that class read and compare.

BurnedToast Sat 06-Jul-19 17:34:50

I find it cringe-worthy. My child has SEN and is never going to her an 'amazing' report but I don't consider it a kick in the teeth if their child does. I just feel embarrassed for the 'proud mama' types for feeling the need to crow and show off about a school report.

Benjispruce Sat 06-Jul-19 17:36:20

Let your success be your noise!

MsTSwift Sat 06-Jul-19 17:36:24

Cringe. That’s what family what’s app groups are for granny is the only other adult vaguely interested

that25cUKHeatwaveof2019 Sat 06-Jul-19 17:37:13

Perhaps schools will stop giving written reports of how a child is doing? Perhaps they should?

when they are 6 years old, they mean nothing anyway, they are always extra positive.
They should accurately describe the child and their achievements and where they should maybe try harder, but they don't.
Written reports are great, but they should be truthful, even in Primary.

Boom25 Sat 06-Jul-19 17:38:19

UTTER CRINGE! and also a massive invasion of the child's privacy. They will ot be happy when they discover this as teenagers

Benjispruce Sat 06-Jul-19 17:38:28

Ours are that25

Biscuitsneeded Sat 06-Jul-19 17:40:17

I don't think the parent posting their child's report intends it as a kick in the teeth for parents of less academically successful. However, it still makes me want to vomit. My children would kill me if I did that.

Weirdpenguin Sat 06-Jul-19 17:43:20

I am glad to hear the child is only 6. If she continues to be so cavalier about his privacy when he is older it won't be great for their relationship. It's the child's report not hers.

Bluerussian Sat 06-Jul-19 17:44:11

School reports, good or bad, should not be made public. It is an invasion of a child's privacy. Suffice to say, if necessary, xxx report was very good or xxx report was not particularly good.

I don't get that it's a 'kick in the teeth' to parents whose child hasn't had such a good result, to post a good report. Kids are not in competition and parents need to learn not to be jealous. However I think posting any report for the world to see is not on.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Sat 06-Jul-19 17:44:52

It honestly make me think that the parent has achieved very little themselves so need the 'prop' of their child's achievements to feel good. I think that's sad.

It's one thing to be proud and post that, it's quite another to put up somebody else's report for 'likes' and 'huns'. It is, as PP said, a sad indictment of how some people are and the direction of travel of society. It's not great.

Justajot Sat 06-Jul-19 17:45:27

Whilst there is some poor parenting about, I think that most parents do a good enough job. That means that how your DC turn out is mostly down to luck. I know fab parents with tricky children. I'm lucky that mine are fairly easy. It would be like a slap in the face to some of my friends if I claimed that my DD's successes were down to my parenting.

mathanxiety Sat 06-Jul-19 17:45:44

Don't feel bad about your child's report. This is not a kick in the teeth for you. It's more like a self inflicted punch in the face to her.
No-one can kick you in the teeth unless you open your mouth to let them. Haffiana

Feel sorry for her child. The mother has embarrassed herself and probably her child too. Classy people do not live their lives on FB and do not brag.

OP, to be honest, in this country ALL the kids have glowing reports at that age, it's neither politically correct nor fashionable to put anything negative. Most parents know that, so it's pretty safe to be proud of your kids
YY to that. You can be proud of your kids always, becuse you know the effort they have put in, you know the starting point they are coming from. It doesn't take a school report for you to know your own child and to be proud of them.

This mother apparently does not know that everyone got more or less the same report. Oh dear.

paddlingwhenIshouldbeworking Sat 06-Jul-19 17:55:51

I don't get why anyone would put any comment about being proud of their child's school report on FB. The only person who cares is the child themselves, so tell them. Everyone else (other than maybe grandparents) rolls their eyes and moves on.

OKBobble Sat 06-Jul-19 18:01:45

You can of course just scroll past.

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