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To say mums of girls are smug

(374 Posts)
TheMidiMitch Thu 18-Apr-19 21:28:42

Just been at a party where my son along with the other boys have been repeatedly told off for fighting (quite rightly so and largely by me). Whilst the girls are busy braiding hair and pretending to make cupcakes, the boys are looking like Lord of the Flies. Not meant to be a goady post but please let me know there's light at the end of this tunnel...anyone...

PumpkinPie2016 Thu 18-Apr-19 21:41:18

I have a boy and yes he can be boisterous/over first etc (he's 5). That said, I teach secondary kids and I have to say, at that are, girls are far worse than boys!

I'd teach in an all boys school without hesitation but all girls? No thanks!

PumpkinPie2016 Thu 18-Apr-19 21:42:02

Over excited

Chocolate35 Thu 18-Apr-19 21:42:23

Boys are so hard when they’re little but I would take that over “can I wear this dress next week?” “No, it’s too slutty” “seriouslllllllllyyyyyy? You’re so prudish”. “Can I stay out till stupid o clock and then you pick me up and drop my friends home?” Teenaged girls are so much work, boys are much easier eventually. Boys are more loving too, in my experience.

englishdictionary Thu 18-Apr-19 21:42:25

My dd had a shit in the garden yesterday.

Literally spat my tea over the iPad 👌🏻

archivearmadillo Thu 18-Apr-19 21:42:59

Bloody hell who swallowed the a-z of lazy child development gender stereotypes.

Little boys and little girls years away from puberty don't innately behave in gender sterotyped ways - you made them like this.

I have both, more boys than girls.

Babuchak Thu 18-Apr-19 21:43:04

I find my boys so much easier! Yes, it's mud, fights, and basically a tornado through the house but they are cuddly, and much more straight forward. I take the fighting and the odd smashed window (what's wrong with using the bloody goal posts we bought FFS hmm ) over the DRAMA and the bloody glitter crap everywhere.

Love all my kids, but god the girls are hard work! They have an easier life, so it all works out in the end I am sure.

Skyejuly Thu 18-Apr-19 21:43:55

I have 3 daughters, 1 son. So far my daughters have been harder
Eldest son is 15
Eldest daughter is 13. She is HARD work

My 7yr old daughter is like a mini wwe fighter. Always wrestling and climbing and shouting!

FaFoutis Thu 18-Apr-19 21:44:07

My boys are 14 and 12 and they are completely lovely. All the time. I also like the fact that they are taller than me (I'm tall) and I made them.
When they were little they never got invited to parties with girls, it's a different story now as the girls are quite keen. Bide your time Midi.

beclev24 Thu 18-Apr-19 21:44:40

urgh, god I'm with you. I never believed any of this, and when DS1 was little he was relatively calm and could focus very very well (better than most girls) so I smugly thought that all the boy vs girl stuff was bs or just condoning bad behaviour. Now I have 3 boys and when they are together they are absolutely wild- incredibly boisterous and physical and often roughhousing or fighting. They do focus and do also enjoy things like art/ reading etc, but their default when they are together is very very wild and physical play or fighting. And no, I don't resign myself to 'boys will be boys' or condone/ allow this behavior. I am constantly constantly disciplining, doling out consequences, giving one on one attention, policing etc etc- . I see my friends with girls whose default is to sit nicely and play in a much less physical way and I am very jealous (and exhausted. And their parents don't have to work for it in the same way at all. It's also true of all male primates- they do engage in more rough and tumble play and aggressive behaviour than female primates so I genuinely believe there is an element of nature rather than nurture to this physicality. They are also very emotional though and we have many many strops/ tantrums/ door slamming/ fallings out etc , so not even sure that the much touted "boys are simple creatures" applies either. I hope it gets easier because I am absolutely exhausted.

notharryssally Thu 18-Apr-19 21:44:47

@Andanotherthingg grin

Babuchak Thu 18-Apr-19 21:45:06

Little boys and little girls years away from puberty don't innately behave in gender sterotyped ways - you made them like this.

it's a total myth, proven completely untrue in many families. There are exceptions to everything, but it's doing no one a favour to pretend boys and girls are identical. They are so not.

Disneymum1993 Thu 18-Apr-19 21:45:20

I have two dds and expecting a boy in september. My girls fight like wwe wrestlers and are constantly into everything although ones girly ones total tomboy climbing trees etc.hoping my boy is a bit less dramatic and not as high maintanence. Love them to bits but sometimes i wonder if its natural for them to fight as much lol

Horses4 Thu 18-Apr-19 21:46:30

My dd9 had a nervous breakdown last year from which she is mostly recovered, and my dd6 punched and kicked her dad yesterday in the opticians because she didn’t want to be there. She was later mollified with a Spider-Man t-shirt. Hair and cupcakes.....not so much. grin

Applesbananaspears Thu 18-Apr-19 21:46:31

Trust me, teen boys are a piece of cake compared to teen girls. It’s worth getting through the wild running around boisterous phase with boys to be free of the teen drama and complicated relationships and attitude of teen girls.

EggplantVestibule Thu 18-Apr-19 21:47:41

I really needed to see this thread today, my two boys (6 & 4) have nigh on broken me today! The constant physical, loud energy! Although I'm sure I'll miss it when they're holed up in their rooms as teens.

paddyclampitt Thu 18-Apr-19 21:49:12

I have one of each. Both lovely. DS was a very lively toddler but he turned out fine!

My teenage DD is NOT bitchy nor is she a drama queen. It is possible.

I hate all this gender crap! I know a lot of people who have 2 or 3 who are the same sex and say they are all very different - it's often just down to the personality of the kid!

Fizzysours Thu 18-Apr-19 21:50:14

Wait til they are all 15. The mums of girls will be broken. 15 year old girls are terrifying and can be truely horrid. For years. I am so jealous of all those mums with their slightly smelly, loveably dopey boys....

archivearmadillo Thu 18-Apr-19 21:51:26

Babuchak families who believe that glitter crap comes out of the womb with a baby with female genitalia somehow bring up toddlers who behave according to gender stereotypes.

Lots of people with both just on this thread are saying it doesn't hold true for them.

Kids have their own individual personalities - boys aren't innately cuddlier or less complicated or muddier, girls aren't innately glittery or into drawing or bitchy. Some might be, but the traits could land in any mix unless parents consciously or unconsciously socialise their children to confirm their expectations.

Tinyteatime Thu 18-Apr-19 21:51:41

Mmmm. I’ve been at a party today where the boys and girls acted identically. They’re 4. I’m yet to see a big difference in behaviour but watching with interest as I have an infant son too.

Bookworm4 Thu 18-Apr-19 21:52:16

I have 3 DD, 1 DS, middle girl makes Lord of the Flies look like bloody choir boys!

Are our DD lost twins? 😂😂

FaFoutis Thu 18-Apr-19 21:52:16

It was my birthday this week and my daughter (aged 9) decided she wasn't going to speak to me all day. She might sit still and draw pictures (sometimes) but she knows how to upset people and will use it. My boys would not do this.

Springisallaround Thu 18-Apr-19 21:53:19

Girls tend to hit puberty earlier than boys, so they can hit the troubled teen/hormonal issues sooner and the boys look easier at that point. Roll on a few years, and teen boys are also a mass of hormones, can also get depression/mental health issues and my own experience is that they can find finding their place in the world harder (work/studying/partying) whereas the girls are more mature. Certainly by uni, girls do well in terms of grades.

Very general remarks, but I don't agree girls are 'worse' than boys in the teen years, there's more complex things going on.

powershowerforanhour Thu 18-Apr-19 21:53:27

I don't really know...I only have one child, a daughter, who has just turned 3, and one nephew who is less than a year old, so I have nothing to compare with.
I don't think I'm smug just fairly middling.
I have been told since my daughter was a foetus that "boys wreck your house, girls wreck your head" and there seems to be an expectation that boys will fight like apes but ultimately be more straightforward, and that my daughter will likely at some point, due to her double dose of X chromosomes, turn from a normal child into a nasty hysterical manipulative wee bitch, but who knows hmm

MaybeitsMaybelline Thu 18-Apr-19 21:53:43

One of each here. Both have had more than their share of “moments” at different times in their lives. Last major stress was DS, or was the last one DDs major meltdown?

They are in their 20s. It works out 50/50. I’m no smug mum of a daughter. Nor a smug mum of a son.

Livedandlearned Thu 18-Apr-19 21:54:24

I have a 15 yr old dd who is lovely, she was crazy when she was younger,

My sons are lovely too and had a small phase of being not so lovely.

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