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To ask how old you were?

(587 Posts)
HarrysOwl Fri 12-Apr-19 07:35:33

When you got married? (If you're married!)

I was reading a BBC article about a woman talking about the judgement and negativity she encountered when she announced her engagement aged 22.

I was 32 when I married DH. We were together for 3 years, got engaged then lived together for another 4 years before having our wedding. I wanted to be as sure as I could be and felt no rush.

Is there a general judgement with feminist overtones about getting married so young? Are they doomed to divorce?

isntthatalwaystheway Sat 13-Apr-19 23:03:12

34, last Summer 🙂

MadameJosephine Sat 13-Apr-19 23:04:43

I was 22 when I got married and divorced at 30

lornz Sat 13-Apr-19 23:12:52

Met at 18.
Engaged at 21.
Married at 23.

I'm now nearly 27 so heading towards 9 years together and 4 married smile one bambino in tow and hoping for a number 2 in the not so distant future smile.

Weathermonger Sat 13-Apr-19 23:21:35

Met my future husband when I was 14. Married at 22, celebrating 33rd Anniversary this year.

Helenisat29 Sat 13-Apr-19 23:47:11

I was 19 when I met my husband. We got engaged on the second date, married six months later, and we've recently celebrated 46 years together. smile

Cryalot2 Sat 13-Apr-19 23:48:18

A few days before 27th birthday. Been rough the last few

Helenisat29 Sat 13-Apr-19 23:49:08

Oh, and hoping to welcome our first Grandchild in August. smilesmilesmile

jaynelovesagathachristie Sun 14-Apr-19 00:24:23

I'm 32, he's 37 still not married after 12 years 2 kids and a mortgage.

Linnet Sun 14-Apr-19 00:53:51

25

Scrumptelicious Sun 14-Apr-19 01:19:43

Met when we were 17. Started going out when we were 20.
Got married at 28 and are married 10 years.

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira Sun 14-Apr-19 01:33:17

Met at 21, had babies at 26 and 29 and married at 29.

Fuck me. That's a long time.

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira Sun 14-Apr-19 01:35:12

And regarding the age thing, I didn't have any, and while I wouldn't comment I do think doing anything before the age of 25 (mortgage, kids, marriage) that isn't easily reversed is madness. Obviously it works for a lot of people though!

CremeEggThief Sun 14-Apr-19 01:38:07

Started living together at 19.
Married at 25.
Divorced at 36, after 2 years separation.

bettythebutterfly Sun 14-Apr-19 02:19:00

Met at 21, married at 25, had first DC at 35. Married 18yrs now.

Catsinthecupboard Sun 14-Apr-19 05:24:04

29 years ago married. Met around 25. Married 28. Children 35 and 38.

My stupid sil said she thought i would be an "old maid.:

She met my brother at 15, married at 20. She's a narcissist and he's crazy. confused

MijasMaddie Sun 14-Apr-19 05:32:36

I was around 27. A toddler and a baby!

flumpybear Sun 14-Apr-19 06:23:33

33, married a week before our 10th anniversary together. That was 14 years ago

Jimjamjools Sun 14-Apr-19 06:35:37

Engaged at 19, married at 22. Recieved a lot of criticism from people at the time who felt they had the authority to comment that we were throwing our lives away and would change as we got older. Hasn't happened so far, so many years down the line. Even if it does, what an exciting adventure to have been on! And we have a daughter now, who arrived when I was just 25 - again, some criticism that I was throwing my independence away so young.

Lolipop44 Sun 14-Apr-19 06:40:26

Met at 20 married at 24 he was 36 we've been married 7 years and it gets better every year smile

user1471452428 Sun 14-Apr-19 07:00:58

I was 22, we needed visas to be together (UK and USA). Still married and in love 20 years later.
I like knowing who he was when we were young. People who get married in their thirties and forties always seem to be negotiating.

user1471452428 Sun 14-Apr-19 07:02:14

Also didn't have a child for ten years. Too busy having fun!

omione Sun 14-Apr-19 07:16:57

I was 17 and it was way too young,i wasnt pregnant so why the hell i was so stupid i will never know. I really didnt know my own mind until i was nearly 30. Your twenties should be about you and you alone

Angelicinnocent Sun 14-Apr-19 07:21:49

Met at 19.
Married 18 months later at 21.
Kids at 24 and 27.
Still together 24 years later.

Daisymaybe60 Sun 14-Apr-19 08:27:09

Met at 17, finished college and worked abroad together for 2 years, got married at 22. Three children by 29, still happily married 42 years later, with 4 grandchildren.

Standard for the time. DSis was the one who was judged for not marrying till 27. smile

TheGoogleMum Sun 14-Apr-19 08:27:20

Met aged 20, engaged just before 26, married age 28. Divorce rates are high so I think nowadays it's more expected that you'll wait longer to be certain and start getting a career established before starting family. I guess when people get married young nowadays as it's less the done thing it feels like rushing or like they haven't experienced enough of life. We all do a lot of growing up in our early 20s I think and if you grow apart instead of together you may regret marrying so young. In my parents generation marrying young was the norm and I think they grew up sooner. My parents still waited till nearly 30 to start having kids though

Fruityb Sun 14-Apr-19 08:28:27

35!

BikeRunSki Sun 14-Apr-19 08:29:41

29, DH was 24

mrshousty Sun 14-Apr-19 09:01:15

Met hubby at 20, moved in together at 28, engaged at 29, married at 33, first baby at 33, second at 38, I'm 39 in June and he'll be 40 in May.

I wanted to get married around 25 years old but he was anti marriage but I was anti kids unless I was married. Took me 9 years to talk him into it 🤣

Ncjustforthisone111 Sun 14-Apr-19 09:04:19

38. I have school friends who were celebrating their 20th wedding anniversaries around the same time I got married!

Olissa8 Sun 14-Apr-19 09:11:13

23. Had three children and divorced by 31. I think it would have ended badly however old I'd been, with hindsight.
I was single for the next 6.5 years and although I now have a lovely DP (and a small DD3) I don't think I'll get married again. I certainly won't have a "wedding".

Newmumma83 Sun 14-Apr-19 09:12:44

Met husband aged 24 ... married him aged 34 I was judged for taking so long ( it was expense to be honest ) x

bubblegumunicorn Sun 14-Apr-19 10:52:30

I think it’s more that people don’t see the need get married anymore a lot of people still do but it’s more socially acceptable to never get married than it ever has been! So it’s odd to get engaged young now I know some people who got married very young and others who’s have been together 20 years and never plan to marry! I was 26 when I got married and a lot of my friends have got/are getting married in the 18months since so she might feel young at 22 but give it 36 months and it won’t be that weird 🤷‍♀️

Mummyontherocks Sun 14-Apr-19 11:10:35

I was 18, lots of judgement at the time and everyone assumed I was pregnant. I wasn't, I had my eldest when I was 30 and I'm still happily married - 23 years now. I don't think age matters, being prepared to work on your relationship matters.

retirementrocks Sun 14-Apr-19 11:43:25

Met DH when I was 23, married at 30 and have been married for 33 years this year. Best decision I ever made!

Mamacute Sun 14-Apr-19 12:34:14

Wow !
Congratulations!

Riv Sun 14-Apr-19 12:43:25

Met at 30, married within the year. Just celebrated 30th anniversary. Looking forward to the next 30 😀

ShowMeTheKittens Sun 14-Apr-19 13:41:35

Married 28 divorced 15 years later

Myusernameisunique Sun 14-Apr-19 13:45:44

Met when I was 19, engaged at 21 and married at 23. Married for 9 years now, 2DCs and we've been together for 13 years!

OopsOhNoZHM Sun 14-Apr-19 13:55:30

Never married but met my ex at 19, engaged at 21, didn’t get any comments until we announced we were expecting our first baby the following year. Then we got all the ‘you’re getting married before the baby arrives, right?’ That was from people our own age, which surprised me. I don’t need to sign a contract with someone to be a good parent. That was the start of the end for my desire to be married 🤷🏼‍♀️ We separated when I was 27. I don’t imagine I’ll get married in the future.

princesscallie Sun 14-Apr-19 13:56:57

Met when we were 18! Engaged at 25 and married at 26! 2 kids married for 8 years. Hasn't all been a bed of roses but we are currently very happy! Who knows what the future holds but having been together for almost 16 years now we ain't doing too bad!

Dowser Sun 14-Apr-19 14:02:15

23 and 63

itsonlysubterfuge Sun 14-Apr-19 14:03:55

DH and I met when we were 15 when we started an online relationship. We met in person at 17. Engaged at 20, married at 21. We just celebrated our 11 year anniversary. Very happy together.

fluffiphlox Sun 14-Apr-19 14:04:59

Knew each other at 20-ish
Got together at 22
Married at 27
Been married 34 years.

JustDanceAddict Sun 14-Apr-19 14:07:23

28

moglovesredroses Sun 14-Apr-19 14:07:36

First one @ 23. Lasted 2 1/2 years
Second one @ 33 after being together 3 years. Still going 6 years later smile

Madison119 Sun 14-Apr-19 14:19:26

Met at 20 and married at 27

RoisinXena Sun 14-Apr-19 14:41:09

My sister was 20 when she got married, never lived with her husband before marriage at this year they will be celebrating their 42nd anniversary.

BackBoiler Sun 14-Apr-19 15:24:17

I got married at 20. I am now 34 and we have three kids

Drogonssmile Sun 14-Apr-19 16:39:36

Met when I was 28 and married when I was 34. Been married 3 years this year. Have two DC. Got married when pregnant with the second.

giveovermypreciousss Sun 14-Apr-19 16:47:43

22. But I married 4 days before my 23rd birthday.
Still married 10 years later.

Stravapalava Sun 14-Apr-19 16:53:35

27 when I was married. This was young in the town where I come from, but about average in the town I was living in at the time.

Newyearnewname2019 Sun 14-Apr-19 16:55:22

Got together at 16, married at 22, now 34. Still happy.

Livpool Sun 14-Apr-19 17:11:52

I was 34 - 9 days shy of being 35. I met my husband when I 31.

Almost 4 years married now, it has flown

MusicianLab1 Sun 14-Apr-19 17:34:21

Met 1989 age 20 married 1998 29. Still married 👍🏻

WikkiTikkiWoo Sun 14-Apr-19 17:41:15

Met when I was 22.. Moved in together when 23, married at 24.

Looking back (20 years later) I am shocked I didn't receive any "but you're so young" comments.. Didn't have kids for ten years though.

Magi84 Sun 14-Apr-19 17:48:03

Married at 24 DH at 30 been married 62 years

pollymere Sun 14-Apr-19 17:52:17

21, nearly 22. Been married twenty years. Did get asked to go on telly about marrying young. Did refuse.

SugarMiceInTheRain Sun 14-Apr-19 17:57:29

Met at 19, married at 20, about 2 weeks before my 21st birthday. Looking back I was a very different person back then. I'm horrified at how immature I probably was and have had moments where I wish I'd had a bit more fun being young and free before settling down, but we are still happily married 17 years and 3 children later so it wasn't a bad decision!

Attitude84 Sun 14-Apr-19 18:03:36

I was 19 (he was 21) when he asked me to marry him. 12 years and 12 days and two kids later we got married!! We are 35 and 36 now and have been married almost 4 years! Wish we had done it A LOT sooner!!!

Confusedbeetle Sun 14-Apr-19 18:04:22

married at 22, still married at 67

Confusedbeetle Sun 14-Apr-19 18:04:43

68

LoveBeingAMum555 Sun 14-Apr-19 19:23:34

Married at 24, two kids by the time I was 28. Still happily married 23 years later. No regrets but DS is 20 and I would rather he waited a bit.

Attitude84 Sun 14-Apr-19 19:51:11

Livpool- when’s your anniversary? We have been married four years this year too

Playmytune Sun 14-Apr-19 20:14:52

Knew him since I was 4. Got together when I was 18. Married at 20. Still together 37 years later.

HelenaJustina Sun 14-Apr-19 20:16:28

20, been married 15 years this year

effiehabb Sun 14-Apr-19 20:18:00

28, we had been together 11 years.

Deadpoet Sun 14-Apr-19 20:32:22

Met at 21
Engaged at 22
Bought our house at 22
Married at 25

Now 45 still married

Livpool Sun 14-Apr-19 20:57:30

Attitude our anniversary is 6th June. What about you?

Cockadoodledooo Sun 14-Apr-19 22:42:42

Our anniversary is also 6th June! 21 years for us this year though. I was 21 when we married, dh 23. Don't remember any negativity about us being young - there was a bit when we announced our engagement 6 weeks after our first date though. Think they realise we're serious now though grin

TheMadGardener Sun 14-Apr-19 22:48:22

Met DH when I was 20. (He's older). Didn't become an item until I was 22. Engaged at 25, married at 28. Still married at 49 although unfortunately DH now has terminal cancer.

When I got married I thought 28 was terribly mature, but looking back it seems young!

PurplePenguins Sun 14-Apr-19 23:09:22

First time 23 lasted 8 years. Second time 36 lasted 2 years.

Livpool Sun 14-Apr-19 23:18:50

Congratulations Cockledoodledoo! Much longer than me 👍

LittleCandle Sun 14-Apr-19 23:22:26

Got married at 22. Was married for 22 years, although we'd been together for 24 years. Don't miss him and know wonder how I stayed married for so long. At the time, that was the norm.

TwinMama6 Mon 15-Apr-19 00:24:58

Met at 16, married at almost 18 ( 2months prior to 18th) still together after 15.5 years.

Dramaqueen2019 Mon 15-Apr-19 00:27:14

Still waiting 😅

OneTitWonder Mon 15-Apr-19 00:37:02

I was 37.

LMDC Mon 15-Apr-19 00:40:47

Got together at 15, married at 20. At 16 we decided on a wedding date which would've meant married at 22, but circumstances changed and we decided to marry sooner.

We have possibly the strongest relationship of everyone we know and have absolutely no regrets. I have no doubt that people judged us at the time but no one was rude to us. I still get the 'wow you're very young to be married'/'you married young' comments now, but all very politely

Numptybean Mon 15-Apr-19 00:47:43

Married at 24

Fantail2018 Mon 15-Apr-19 11:26:37

Met at 19, married at 22 and still together 16 years later.

mirime Mon 15-Apr-19 12:00:46

Engaged in our early 20s, married in our early 30s. We had something like a 12 year engagement. Meant to have a longish engagement, didn't mean for it to be that long!

proseccoandbooks Mon 15-Apr-19 12:05:11

Wedding next September- I'll be 27 (almost 28) and he'll be 31.

Furrydogmum Mon 15-Apr-19 12:17:24

Met when I was nearly 15 and he was nearly 17. Married when I was 20 and he was 22. Will be our 23rd anniversary this year. We've done a lot of growing up in our time and it hasn't always been easy but I think we love each other more now than when we got married.. Still find him attractive too.
Our oldest son is almost 21, I wouldn't want him to settle down yet - he tells me he's not that stupid anyway 😂

MarieeBarone Sat 20-Apr-19 19:11:55

Together since 16, engaged 24, baby 25, married 26, am 32 now. I guess I didn't get the "too young" comments as we'd already been together 10 years.

Isthisreallylife Tue 07-May-19 22:05:23

I got married to my first husband at age 28 - he was 35. We met when I was 26. My son was born when I was 36 and we got divorced when I was 40.
I met my second husband when I was 42, we got married when I was 62 and are getting divorced this year when I am 63.
Obviously, well, in my case, age doesn’t always bring wisdom

GoodPlaceJanet Tue 07-May-19 22:12:07

DH was 23 when we got married and I was a couple of years oldẹr. If anyone said anything negative it never made it to my ears. He was always very mature though, worked full time since 16, wanted family life. 10 years later still happily enjoying our life together.

RedSheep73 Tue 07-May-19 22:14:27

We were 26. Been together since 18. Now 45 and still married!

teyem Tue 07-May-19 22:15:31

I got married at 23, we've been married 17 years. We were only engaged for three months. My dm was a bit shocked about the speed of it all but no-one had anything negative to say about it or they had the good sense to keep it to themselves.

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