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Man doing my pedicure

(280 Posts)
eyesbiggerthanstomach Tue 12-Mar-19 16:24:53

I'm having a rubbish day so maybe am being super sensitive but not sure. There is a nail bar I regularly go to. A few men work there but it's mainly women. Usually one of the women does my pedicure. I have had one or two of the men do it in the past too.

Anyway, am currently getting one done by a man and I'm feeling really uncomfortable. I can't explain why. Maybe because he is slow and so every touch feels like it's lasting ages but I'm not enjoying it.

Is it unreasonable to specify a woman does it in future?

glamourous Tue 12-Mar-19 18:17:07

I dont get the biscuits 🙄
YANBU! I'd feel weirded out at a random man touching my feet and doing my pedicure. I've been at a salon where I chose to wait and have a female do it instead. There's nothing wrong with that OP!

whiteroseredrose Tue 12-Mar-19 18:20:44

YANBU. I'd feel uncomfortable too.

teyem Tue 12-Mar-19 18:21:31

They're special woke biscuits that you need to keep eating to avoiding speaking up and upsetting the men.

ijustneedagoodshake Tue 12-Mar-19 18:23:01

I wouldn't care personally but that's me.
Your paying for a service so presumably you can ask for whoever you want?

Ignoremeiaminvisible Tue 12-Mar-19 18:24:38

Oh I had a female bus driver and didn't feel safe. Can I ask for a man next time?

Weetabixandshreddies Tue 12-Mar-19 18:30:31

Regardless of it being a man, woman or dog doing the pedicure I would be very concerned about standards in a salon where staff think it's ok to peel potatoes at the nail bar!!!!

ijustneedagoodshake Tue 12-Mar-19 18:30:32

It's different if they are touching you surely?

teyem Tue 12-Mar-19 18:32:06

Yes, absolutely, get the next bus invisible. I totally get it right, what with having been told for the whole of your life to take care of how you behave around females because they have leaky boundaries and a propensity to objectify and violate you at a social level and a criminal justice system that lays the blame squarely at your feet for having asked for it? And how this continual assessment about your level of safety about women and their access to your body might make you feel uncomfortable...

fashiondevotee Tue 12-Mar-19 18:41:11

I'm assuming the nail is bar is Asian-run? That's pretty standard IMO, it tends to be the whole family involved in the business. I've never had a problem with a man doing my nails versus a woman.

Ignoremeiaminvisible Tue 12-Mar-19 19:12:29

" It's different if they are touching you"
Really? Doctors, Dentists etc etc. Can't believe the comments on here.
If it was a massage fair enough but a pedicure, unbelievable!!
If you don't like how you were treated fair enough ask for someone else next time, BUT the "male" comment is totally unacceptable and would not be tolerated in reverse.

JessicaWakefieldSVH Tue 12-Mar-19 19:21:14


Yes really. Plenty of women ask for female doctors and dentists. Plenty of men also prefer male doctors, some prefer female if they’ve had past abuse. Are you really not aware why some people might have preferences with who touches their body? Really?

Bluestitch Tue 12-Mar-19 19:21:34

There are many woman who also request female doctors and dentists. What's wrong with that?

ijustneedagoodshake Tue 12-Mar-19 19:37:38

I think some religions might require a
Not really sure tbh?

I'm in the minority I think, I'd be fine with a male for a smear.
I'd expect a male or a female to be professional and they'd
Both have the same qualifications surely but again that's just me. I don't expect everyone to feel ok with that.

Personal preference is fine if someone is touching your body for any reason surely?

Same as my stepson talks to his dad about some things and me about others?

SlinkyDinkyDoo Tue 12-Mar-19 19:41:08

peeling a potato where the fuck is this salon? Russia 1872?

ijustneedagoodshake Tue 12-Mar-19 19:42:47

What's he doing with the potatoes? Shepherds
Or cottage pie?

ChristineBaskets Tue 12-Mar-19 19:46:38

Love the woke biscuits comment. Fucking spot on.

OP if you feel uncomfortable getting a personal service from a man you should absolutely feel able to ask for a woman. Always trust your instincts with things like this.

roisinagusniamh Tue 12-Mar-19 19:56:40


ijustneedagoodshake Tue 12-Mar-19 20:06:07

Is it sexist though?

If I was offering a service touching someone and a man said "I'd rather have a man" so what?

What's wrong with that?
Someone is touching you well should t you feel ok with who is touching you?

Ignoremeiaminvisible Tue 12-Mar-19 20:15:07

Equality in the work place works both ways FFS. Some of the comments on here are unbelievable. Did the op say anything about previous sexual abuse? Think very carefully about what you are saying before making sweeping statements. There are always posters on here banging on about "god are we back in the 1950's" well yes by the look of things we are. Equality means "equality" its not just women who should be able work in whatever profession they chose but men can also.

SurgeHopper Tue 12-Mar-19 20:17:32

One of the best pedicures I ever had was by a guy.

He really put the effort into the foot massage bit

teyem Tue 12-Mar-19 20:21:14

Why would the poster have said anything about previous sexual abuse? Are you struggling to understand my earlier post where I explain how women are expected to police their own boundaries effectively so as to not be vulnerable to male violence on the one hand but expected to not police them too rigidly so as to not hurt men's feelings on the other?

sagradafamiliar Tue 12-Mar-19 20:22:19

Absolutely not unreasonable. Ignore the 'sexist' bollocks. It's your body, you get to say who touches it for any reason you like. You're the customer as well, spend your money how you like.

llangennith Tue 12-Mar-19 20:22:29

I would be stressed if anyone but my usual lady did my pedicure let alone a male. Yes I know it's daft but I don't like being touched unless I'm really comfortable with the person doing the touching.

Hanumantelpiece Tue 12-Mar-19 20:24:49

I don't think I'd be that bothered whether it were a man or a woman doing the pedicure, but I would be put off if the person seemingly had no idea what they were doing. I'd certainly be put off if they were peeling vegetables.

teyem Tue 12-Mar-19 20:27:04

No, chances are that I wouldn't be put off either but I don't see why the op is expected to shut the fuck up to save hurt feelings.

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