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SAHM/Homemakers - What do you do all day?

(997 Posts)
Fruem Tue 16-Jan-18 20:31:06

Those who choose to be a SAHM/homemaker, who don’t ‘have’ to work, what do you do all day?!

I’m talking the SAHM’s who don’t work from home. Who don’t have to look after the kids all day etc.

If you’ve done cleaning/washing/shopping etc. How do you fill your day?

AthenaAshton Tue 16-Jan-18 20:38:46

Blimey. I have several. When they were little, I went for lots of very long (actually, 10 mins in RL, but accounting for examining drains etc) walks. We walked to the library. That took a while. We walked to playgroup. Ditto. They had lunch. I read to them, with my eyes shut because I knew the stories off by heart, but had been up since 5.30. We then played endless imaginary games, because it wasn't effing tea time yet. God, those days felt like years. But the years seem like minutes. Work that one out...

madmomma Tue 16-Jan-18 20:39:37

God I'd love a cleaner pag

Fairylea Tue 16-Jan-18 20:39:46

I go walking a lot. We live rurally and I enjoy trying to do as many steps as I can! I’m quite into my fitness. I do two long walks every day.

I enjoy cooking from scratch and like to plan what we’re going to eat etc.

I eat a lot - which balances out my fitness grin I eat a lot of fruit and cake! And drink a lot of tea.

I spend time with my mum (we are going to the cinema tomorrow).

I watch tv - I’m halfway through The Crown on Netflix.

And of course I do all the usual housework crap / cleaning etc.

My son is 5 and has autism and learning disabilities and attends complex needs school so the time he is at school is my “down” time. I love being at home. Dh works full time and we’re happy like this - he enjoys work, I always hated work (I used to earn twice as much as dh). We also have a teenage dd.

formerbabe Tue 16-Jan-18 20:40:07

Pagwatch

I do the cleaning myself because I can't afford a cleaner...crazy huh?!

Dipitydoda Tue 16-Jan-18 20:40:08

Ooh if I was a sahm mum based on my non working day I’d drop DS at school back for 9. Coffee then clean for an hour, go to the gym/ pool with a friend, maybe a spot of lunch. Back home, do something around the house, read, watch a film pick DS from
School at330. Be a lot stressed. I know I’m not your target audience but ooh it would be bliss

MozTheMonster Tue 16-Jan-18 20:41:07

Ha! I think you're talking about me! I take the DC to school and collect them. Then I can do what I like! I have to visit elderly parents 1-2 times a week, and due to distance that takes up most of the school day. I do all the household cleaning, shopping, washing/ironing, DIY, cooking (lots of batch cooking), appointment/holiday organising etc. I go for a coffee with friends/other mums (usually once a week). I spend a lot of time on my own (happy about that). I go to the gym 2-3 times a week during the day. I make things (curtains, cushions, clothes). I supervise all homework. Basically I do everything at home and for the DC. DH leaves early, gets home late. We try to keep weekends totally free for fun family stuff (and homework). It works well at the moment. We are not well off enough for me to be getting my nails/hair done every other week. I don't spend much money being at home, I just don't add to the family income.

Friedgreen Tue 16-Jan-18 20:41:32

Most sit around smoking pot and scratching their bums hmm

Why does there need to be yet another thread on this tedious subject. It’s like people don’t know how to read older threads (the last one was probably a month old).

AthenaAshton Tue 16-Jan-18 20:41:58

Sorry. Have now read the entire thread, and have evidently failed to give the requisite sarky answer. Now that my lot are 13 plus, I'd gladly go back to inspecting drains. But that presumably makes me a saddo who should have a cleaner. Anyway.

Pagwatch Tue 16-Jan-18 20:43:46

Formerbabe

I not questioning your doing your housework. I'm questioning why it would take anyone literally all week and still not be done.
How is that even possible?

I've had years without cleaners, three kids, two dogs, a child with SN who needed lots of extra time and a large old house with children with dust allergy.
It still didn't take all my time.

You said you must be doing something wrong - maybe you should revisit how much of this is actually necessary and not habit. Unless you have children with SN or high needs?

Pagwatch Tue 16-Jan-18 20:45:24

If you have children or a partner with disabilities or have special extra pressures then I apologise profusely.
It's just an average family should create a whole week of work should they?

BoomBoomsCousin Tue 16-Jan-18 20:45:35

I have redecorated the house. Done a degree and am about to embark on another. I read a lot. Visit art galleries and museums. Go window shopping. Meet friends for lunch.

But I only do those things a bit. I spend most of my day making sure everything domestic gets taken care of, which is so dull I --spend all my time --occasionally have to spend time on forums of the Internet.

Lilliepixie Tue 16-Jan-18 20:46:18

Here's how I look at it
From 6-10am get ready for school, drive to school, walk dog
3pm-10pm is school pick up, homework, dinner time, bedtime routine.
None of that time is mine.

From 10-3 is my time. To do whatever thefuck I want.
Watch TV, coffee, lunch, friends
Cinema
As well as the cleaning, tidying, laundry, garden etc.

Haudyerwheesht Tue 16-Jan-18 20:47:13

Coffee with friends. Voluntary work, reading,watching tv sometimes but not much really, housework and admin, bigger jobs in the house like declutterring or decorating .

Nothing amazing but I don't feel guilty. Dh works away a lot and at short notice plus we don't have family nearby.

JaneEyre70 Tue 16-Jan-18 20:47:28

I am an avid walker, so the dog and I spend around 2 hours a day walking. That then involves washing the dog twice a day hmm. I'm very tidy and do a lot of housework, I cook all our meals from scratch and in the summer do all the gardening and stuff. I'm also a keen photographer so love driving off somewhere with the dog and my camera. I also look after my grandkids a lot, help my dad out with shopping/drs visits etc. The days go very quickly, but I love that I can do what I like when I like grin. I probably read too much as well - can't beat an afternoon in front of the woodburner with the dog on my lap and a pot of tea with a good book.

Lethaldrizzle Tue 16-Jan-18 20:47:56

I used to write goady posts on mumsnet about sahms

Pagwatch Tue 16-Jan-18 20:49:49

Lilliepixie

I was a bit like that. Early morning was getting up at 6.00 until all at school. Once the DC got home it was busy until they went to bed. Weekends were busy to so the bit in the middle of the weekday was for me

formerbabe Tue 16-Jan-18 20:49:54

My house just seems to get dirty really quickly. Honestly if I dust a surface, in two days time it will look filthy again. No pets but I seem to hoover and straightaway see bits on the carpet again! The washing and ironing is non stop. One of my DC does have some minor sn, which does take up some time.

Tullula Tue 16-Jan-18 20:50:03

Thing is a school day isn’t as long as the working day. Even though my youngest two are in secondary - I do just have 9.30-3.30pm myself. It sounds like a dream - but really it’s just 6 hours.

By the time I dog walk, maybe shop for food or cook (too many food allergies to not cook from scratch), clean or iron the day flies by. The children often have a hospital/ GP appointment- two have chronic illness.

I do also pursue hobbies/ go to the gym/ meet friends for coffee or lunch - but not as much as you’d think. And going for coffee/ lunch just bores me. I’d rather be reading some history/ learning a language or trying to learn the piano. One of these will happen at some point during the day, if I’m lucky, and it never lasts long.

I do like my life not working. But it’s not like I have endless hours to do what I like.

counterpoint Tue 16-Jan-18 20:50:30

@JaneEyre70

I want to be you! smile

80sMum Tue 16-Jan-18 20:51:00

When I was a SAHM, I found that I rarely had any time for myself. All my time was spent doing housework; shopping; preparing or cooking food; keeping the baby/children occupied; walking to and from shops, playgroup, playgrounds, playmates' houses etc. It was pretty exhausting to be honest. The relentless 24/7 on-duty nature of it did used to get me down at times. There was no respite, no "me time" at all.

When my youngest was 3 I took a part time job in a local factory, working evenings 6.00 till 10pm (when DH could look after the kids when he got home from work). It was tiring, as I had been up since before 6.00am, but it was lovely to be able to leave the house and go out and do something that was nothing to do with the children or housework - and the added bonus was that I was actually paid to do it!

StealthPolarBear Tue 16-Jan-18 20:51:51

I think the drain inspector was actually walking with a toddler grin

liz70 Tue 16-Jan-18 20:51:56

Housework when necessary
Go for walks
Crochet, kinitting, loom knitting and other yarn craft, usually while either
listening to stories or radio dramas on iPlayer radio, or
watching usually history or nature programmes on iPlayer or My5 (using Chromecast to watch them on our non Smart TV).
Sometimes do online courses at FutureLearn
Chat with parents or DD1 by phone or FB Messenger
Some gardening in spring and summer
Noodle on the internet
Read books, either ebooks or paper
Exercise, usually jogging on the spot with hand weights on the mini trampoline, again while watching programmes that interest me. Either that or workout videos, either our own DVDs, or on YouTube, again on the TV via Chromecast.
Order online grocery shopping and put it away when it's delivered.
Listen to music, obviously.
Occasionally bake although I'm not great at it.
Practise playing my treble recorder and sight reading music (see above).

I'm never bored!

Oliversmumsarmy Tue 16-Jan-18 20:52:41

When you say all day do you realise that your all day is actually only between 10am-2pm by the time you have dropped dc at school and returned home then having to set off to go and pick up again you only actually have 4 hours to get everything done before setting off to collect dc.

By the time you have done shopping cleaned the house and diy and garden and laundry I never seemed to have any spare time.

formerbabe Tue 16-Jan-18 20:52:42

I tend to shop for food little and often which also takes up more time I guess.

StealthPolarBear Tue 16-Jan-18 20:52:45

Till surely that's an incredibly short secondary day?

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