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To say yes, I CAN have a tidy home and a DC?

(195 Posts)
VincentIsGodly Sun 04-Jun-17 22:22:08

My house is never a mess, and I take pride in organisation and I'm a bit of a classic decor lover... I love it.

DS1 is due in November. I'm getting varied comments about never being able to keep my house tidy once DS arrives. Similar to this, I have a lot of people laugh at me and make snidey comments when I dare mention (after being pressed), about birth plan, of which includes natural birthing strategies with gas and air as an aid. Because how dare I have a single plan hmm

Bit of background. I took on a DC of 1 week until he was 4 months old a few years back. It's a personal, family issue, but my house was not a mess. It was trickier but also therapeutic.

I have never, ever dared mention cleaning or anything to anyone. If someone has a messy house, so what? Maybe instead of cleaning to a photo standard, they watch a box set etc. It doesn't bother me and I don't think any less of anyone who isn't exactly tidy.

However, I'm quite sick of friends and family coming over and making comments of how I'll be joining them and their messy houses very soon.

Yes, sometimes things won't be so great but that's fine! I have a tiny baby. But, I'll still make the effort as I did looking after an infant before.

Yes, birth plans often don't go to plan. That's no reason not to have an idea of what I want, is it? I won't put myself down if it goes tits up. My body is amazing regardless.

AIBU here to tell people straight next time? It's turning into more than the odd comment.

PickAChew Sun 04-Jun-17 22:23:21

You can try.

Just be careful where you leave that sudocrem grin

VincentIsGodly Sun 04-Jun-17 22:24:22

Pick I'm allergic to it so won't be purchasing grin

Threw the little pot you get free away!

SleepFreeZone Sun 04-Jun-17 22:25:34

grin

BunsBumpBlur Sun 04-Jun-17 22:26:52

grin

WhatInTheWorldIsGoingOn Sun 04-Jun-17 22:27:27

My house is tidy. I have two children and a dog. My birth plan was gas and air and I did it for both children. It's possible.

TupperwareTat Sun 04-Jun-17 22:27:50

grin

AnnaT45 Sun 04-Jun-17 22:27:58

My house wasn't messy after my first really. I then had another 1.5 year later and I hugely struggle to keep it tidy. I think it depends on your priorities when you get time. Some like a cuppa or a nap or to clean! It's possible but certainly not as easy! Good luck

VincentIsGodly Sun 04-Jun-17 22:28:07

What are the grins for?

I have (some) experience blush Plus I have friends with multiple DC's and lovely, tidy homes grin

SaorAlbaGuBrath Sun 04-Jun-17 22:29:09

This isn't going to end well.

I have a 5 year old and my house is no less tidy now than it was before I had him. We just tidy as we go, stuff doesnt sent get left out. I have more stuff, of course, but that doesn't have to mean mess.

acornsandnuts Sun 04-Jun-17 22:30:02

Tiny babies don't make a mess and yes you can have a tidy house if you can function on less sleep, plenty do A toddler is a tornado of chaos but if you're a tidy person you will cope.

A 14 year old..,no chance.

TheHoneyBadger Sun 04-Jun-17 22:30:34

gas and air is all that was available so i'm glad i hadn't planned for anything else grin

look realistically get used to people sticking their noses in, to unsolicited advice, to comments on and about every aspect of you, your life, your parenting, blah blah blah. this is just the warm up.

WaitrosePigeon Sun 04-Jun-17 22:30:59

This will be good smile

WhooooAmI24601 Sun 04-Jun-17 22:32:19

We've two children, a dog, five cats and two rabbits. I also teach full time and our house is always lovely and clean. I just like it tidy so don't let it deteriorate. It's entirely possible to keep your house neat when you have DCs. The only time mine's not is every Sunday morning during rugby season as both DCs play, come home caked in 47 inches of mud and prance about the house going "I can't find my pants, help me" whilst traipsing it everywhere. I drink more on Sundays, tbh.

SheRaaarghPrincessOfPower Sun 04-Jun-17 22:32:32

Don't put so much pressure on yourself. See how you go and do what you can. Chances are that sometimes it'll be tidy, and sometimes it really won't be

WyfOfBathe Sun 04-Jun-17 22:32:46

My baby doesn't make my house less tidy. My 5 year old does, though. And after a day of cluster feeding, changing nappies, dealing with vomit, and then doing reading/playing/etc with the 5 year old, I would definitely find it hard to spend the evening cleaning amongst going upstairs for night feeds.

I also had a "natural" birth plan and luckily it all went smoothly, but it might not, and I also researched emergency C Sections.

I think parents might find you a bit idealistic grin

Firenight Sun 04-Jun-17 22:32:57

Yes it was the second child that did for the tidy house! And juggling work, kids and hobbies. If I didn't have lots of stuff-generating interests (crafty pursuits are particularly bad) it might be more manageable?

The people I know with tidy homes either severely limit the number of toys their kids own or are very strict about them tidying up as they go, which only really works with 100% supervision or super obedient kids.

Mummamayhem Sun 04-Jun-17 22:33:00

You'll be fine with one....it's two over 18 months that's hard work 😋

Girlsinthegarden Sun 04-Jun-17 22:34:07

It's perfectly possible but I've never managed it. I know lots who have though.

Mummamayhem Sun 04-Jun-17 22:35:36

And it's perfectly fine to have a birth plan but research all eventualities, knowledge is power.

Griffintoes Sun 04-Jun-17 22:35:53

It is possible, but as pp said - don't put too much h pressure on yourself and see how it goes.

I hate that the invite you're pregnant people feel like they have aright to make snide comments! I could never stand mummy groups for that reason. Give me childless friends any day!

Griffintoes Sun 04-Jun-17 22:36:26

*minute

FunnysInLaJardin Sun 04-Jun-17 22:36:29

hmmm. I thought the same. Babies are fine, they don't move, however after they start moving it is a different story. My DC are now 7 and 11 and we stem the tide of crap with a good blitz every half term. It will never ever be as tidy as it was.

Re your birth plan, don't set yourself up to fail. I had a natural birth and G&A with DS2, however had the full works with DS1 and nearly had a EMCS.

mycheeksarerosy Sun 04-Jun-17 22:37:39

I manage it. However I keep my house pretty clutter free so that makes it easier.

When DD was first born I would do it when she napped in the morning. I also managed to work out too.

Now she is 14 months and I do it in the morning after she has had breakfast and is playing with her dad before we all get ready.

It's doable but you have to get yourself In a good routine and prioritise.

Also get a cordless Hoover if you don't already have one!!

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