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AIBU?

Girls told to wear longer skirts at school because the boys are distracted and male teachers feel uncomfortable.

583 replies

Exercisejunkieforlife · 05/04/2017 08:54

My DD is 15, yesterday all the girls were kept behind in assembly and told they must wear skirts from the official uniform shop.
I have no problem with this as this is where we get DDs skirts, my problem is with the reasons given.

They were told that it distracts the boys when the girls walk up the stairs and makes the male teachers feel uncomfortable.

AIBU to think that the girls should not have to modify their behaviour / what they wear so the 'boys' don't look up their skirts and that the male teachers are responsible for their own feelings. ?

OP posts:
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glenthebattleostrich · 05/04/2017 08:56

I'd be writing to the head and pointing out exactly that.

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AllllGooone · 05/04/2017 08:57

Urgh. Poor male teachers, so hard to not sexualise 15 yr olds Angry

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MsJamieFraser · 05/04/2017 08:57

I don't think they should but on the other hand, I don't want my boy walking up stairs to see girls things, not that I think it's wrong to see, I just don't think it's appropriate in a school setting.

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Lottapianos · 05/04/2017 08:57

Totally agree OP. The boys in the school (and the male teachers FFS) need to learn how to behave appropriately when 'distracted' by female body parts. It's trying to shake young women for being young women and yet again, i cannot quite believe that we are in 2017 and still this shit continues

I would definitely be going 'up the school' about this one

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araiwa · 05/04/2017 08:58

i dont think miniskirts that barely cover their butt is appropriate school uniform for a 15 year old schoolgirl

its school and they should dress appropriately

they can wear what they want in their free time

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Winetemptress · 05/04/2017 08:58

Yes the reasons are ridiculous and sexist as girls are not responsible for men's behaviour and sexual urges however agree the skirts should reflect the work environment rather than a night club/party environment and that's what the school should have said.

Appropriate clothes for the work/school place.

You need to have a word with the senior manager he team as they need done educating as that's pretty shocking.

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Lottapianos · 05/04/2017 08:58

Should be 'shame young women' obvs

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MsJamieFraser · 05/04/2017 08:58

Thongs.

But I also don't expect to see full on cleevagebin the work force either, as again it's inappropriate

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SoupDragon · 05/04/2017 08:59

I always feel conflicted about this. No, they shouldn't have to modify their behaviour but why do they want to wear really short skirts anyway? Is the main reason so that boys will admire their legs? It cant be for comfort, surely. If they are wearing them very short to get males to look at them then it seems fair enough to say that they shouldn't as it makes them uncomfortable (the teenagers more than the teachers)

I've never really, understood it as boys/men rarely go for skimpy clothing so is it just that it's what is expected of females?

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rosethyme · 05/04/2017 08:59

I agree, they shouldn't have to modify what they wear because of boys leering at them. But trying to stop boys from leering at girls is something that just ain't going to happen. So seems sensible to me. The male teachers though is another matter.

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Sparklingbrook · 05/04/2017 09:00

The skirts they are wearing must be extremely short. Confused

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ShatnersWig · 05/04/2017 09:01

Clearly, for them to make a big deal of it after assembly, a LOT of girls must be wearing skirts that are classed as too short. Why are the parents not ensuring their children wear the correct uniform?

Of course boys shouldn't look up girls skirts. But we're talking teenagers with raging hormones. A girl going upstairs in front of them who is wearing a skirt so short that the boys can see their knickers is wearing an inappropriate outfit for school.

A lot of people are concerning about the "sexualisation" of teenagers getting younger each year in terms of clothes.

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oklumberjack · 05/04/2017 09:01

Hmmm. Obviously many of the girls are not wearing skirts from the official uniform shop. If the skirts are so short that you can see under them when they walk upstairs then I think it's a bit of a problem yes.

I think it's a decency thing. If a boy wore a pair of shorts so tight and so short that it left not a lot to the imagination I would think exactly the same thing.

My friend (mid 40's) wore a pair of black hot pants the other day with sheer black tights. She bent over to pick something up and believe me, I saw pretty much everything. I couldn't not.

Girls can wear whatever they like outside of school, as can my friends

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Pestilentialone · 05/04/2017 09:01

If I can see what colour a girl's knickers are, the skirt is too short.
If they flash the occasional bit of knicker whilst being gangly, daft teenagers, well that happens and will be grown out of. No problem.
If I can see their knickers whilst they are walking, climbing stairs or sitting sensibly. They need a longer skirt.
As a female teacher I can say this to a student. If a male teacher says the same, he is liable to be accused of all sorts.

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Exercisejunkieforlife · 05/04/2017 09:02

I agree that short skirts are not appropriate for the environment they are in, however this message that they can control what the boys do by modifying their behaviour is what is giving me the rage.

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Moussemoose · 05/04/2017 09:03

Many years ago I sat in on a drama class of year 7s. They were sitting on the floor cross legged.

Thongs and short skirts.

It's not just male teachers who don't want an eyeful.

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EBearhug · 05/04/2017 09:04

I'd be writing, too. Official school uniform, fair enough. Making girls responsible for how men and boys feel is not on. I hope they'll be talking to the boys about how to manage being distracted, and if the teachers can'take cope - well, they're teaching in a mixed secondary school. It's part of the job that girls this age will be walking round, and whatever the school uniform is, there will be girls who unbuttoned their blouses one button too far, and roll up their skirts to make them shorter. If it's against scholarly uniform, pick them up on it, and if that's the worst of their behaviour, be glad. If a teacher can't cope with how he feels, he probably needs to consider if it's the right place for him to work.

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oklumberjack · 05/04/2017 09:05

I really don't want to see someone's arse handing out when I'm behind them in the stairs no matter who they are.
The school could have phrased it differently but I think it's right to point out. It's school.

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oklumberjack · 05/04/2017 09:05

Hanging not handing.

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MsJamieFraser · 05/04/2017 09:06

Tbf as a woman I don't want to see young girls underwear, and it makes me uncomfortable, so I'd completely understand why a male teacher would find it uncomfortable also, just because it makes them feel uncomfortable does not mean they have any sexualise the female students.

My dh would be completely side tracked by this in a work place setting.

Actually he was one day when he went to a customers home and she was in a towel with her 2 female kids, he went home as to him it was completely inappropriate to conduct a meeting.

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deadpool99 · 05/04/2017 09:06

I agree with soupdragon. Wearing an extremely short skirt is usually to draw attention to legs which is fine out of school, but not in school.

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SoupDragon · 05/04/2017 09:06

however this message that they can control what the boys do by modifying their behaviour is what is giving me the rage.

But are they already trying to "control" what the boys do by deliberately wearing very short skirts?

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Sparklingbrook · 05/04/2017 09:08

I have had quite an eyeful on escalators in shops, sometimes it's difficult to know where to look. Sad

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That1950sMum · 05/04/2017 09:10

There is clearly a problem here that the school are trying to address.

I agree that the male teachers should have no problem. They are adults and should not be distracted in any way by 15 year old girls. Maybe this was an ill-advised thing to say.

Teenage boys though are a mess of hormones and probably are incredibly distracted by skirts that are so short they are showing the girls' knickers as they walk upstairs.

Girls need to learn to dress appropriately for their environment. Very short skirts are not appropriate for school any more than they are in a workplace. There is no reason for them to be wearing such short skirts and I think it is entirely appropriate that they have been told to revert to the proper uniform.

It is a shame that the school have had to point this out. The parents should have stuck to the proper uniform in the first place.

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Kennethwasmyfriend · 05/04/2017 09:10

I have seen girls' knickers in school sometimes and that is something that makes me uncomfortable despite being female - it's that you've seen something they wouldn't want you too, breached their privacy through no fault of your own. There are short skirts and short skirts - the fashion for a while was basically a belt, worn over tights that weren't as opaque as they imagined them to be. Wholly inppropriate for work or school, you need to be able to move around freely without flashing at someone.

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