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to wear a white dress to a wedding?

(156 Posts)
ToothpasteKisses Mon 06-May-13 22:04:40

Have a friends wedding in June.

Have been looking at dresses online and my favourite ones are white. None are "bridey" looking dresses.

If you were the bride would that annoy you? Or is it a silly old tradition that only the bride wears white?

hambo Wed 08-May-13 10:32:22

Toothpastekisses - that was my song at my wedding (toothpaste kisses)

Snowflakepie Wed 08-May-13 10:24:14

Don't do it. Definitely not if there is no other colour or pattern on it.

My BILs then-girlfriend wore white to my wedding.

I drunkenly convinced another BIL to accidentally spill his beer on her, and then gushingly offered her my jeans to wear as our flat was nearby.

I hope she learned a lesson that day. She was also not BILs girlfriend for much longer. Job done.

weisswusrt Wed 08-May-13 10:22:19

If you break the 'rules' of wedding etiquette, you set yourself up to become a social pariah. I have spent many a happy hour at weddings slagging of the 'bitches' who turn up in white.

glendatheveryexcitedwitch Wed 08-May-13 10:02:06

Big fat no I'm afraid - my wedding dress was a strapless ivory with black embroidery affair and my neighbour ( who had seen said dress) wore a strapless prom style dress in ivory with black embroidery!!! I was pissed big time and she ruined my day completely (by doing other things too)

olgaga Wed 08-May-13 08:24:47

OP, consider us all told - but surely you can allow us to talk amongst ourselves?

I saw a fantastic emerald green silk suit I wanted to get married in - all my friends were horrified!

In the end the engagement fizzled out. Five years later I met my now DH, so as far as I'm concerned green is quite lucky in relation to weddings!

I eventually got married in a long (but not full length) pale gold damask dress I found in Dorothy Perkins for £59.99.

Trill Wed 08-May-13 08:14:22

If it had been someone lovely we might have just said "oh, that's not a choice I would have made", but since we already believed her to be not-very-nice we were quietly mean. Because we are bitches.

Trill Wed 08-May-13 08:11:49

OP - people are not "going on about it" - they are "discussing the topic you raised. Thy can do so without you if you'd rather leave.

Even if the bride doesn't mind, would you mind all of the aunties looking at you and muttering?

I went to a wedding recently where a guest wore a short white sparkly dress. The top half could have been a wedding dress. I muttered and ask my friends if they had noticed, and I am not an elderly auntie. (the woman in question had shown herself at the hen do to be rather attention-seeky)

Mabroon101 Wed 08-May-13 08:06:55

Oh God no. Don't. The queen wore white when Charles and Camilla got married and I've never forgiven her for it.

I doubt Camilla has either.

LittleMissLucy Wed 08-May-13 02:55:40

I think you are not supposed to wear green to a wedding, as a guest, but its archaic, and I don't know if people care so much about that one as the guest in WHITE.

Thumbwitch Tue 07-May-13 23:37:11

Bumbolina - green is the colour of envy, so it's meant to be bad luck to put your bridesmaids in green because it suggests they're envious of the bride; not sure about it being bad luck for a guest to wear it though!

YABU OP, because you said "about a year ago" and made me worry I'd been suckered into posting into a zombie thread, and I scrolled all the way up to the top sad in order to find out you were just speaking metaphorically. I am now sulking, and looking for a phrase that expresses the triviality of my complaint. Middle class, first world problems doesn't even begin to cover it grin.

ToothpasteKisses Tue 07-May-13 23:24:15


Just getting your attention.

I very much forgot about this thread. Already said about a year ago I'm not going to, but will still buy the dress because I like it.

I asked. Got my answers. Realised I WBU. Changed my mind.

Odd that people are still going on about this really. Let it go confused

thebody Tue 07-May-13 22:59:50

Definatly not op. it's very bad manners.

Bumbolina Tue 07-May-13 22:55:02

Just to throw this in to the discussion - my Mum was shocked that I wore green to a wedding as apparently that brings bad luck... she'd never heard of white being an issue!

2rebecca Tue 07-May-13 22:48:44

I'd run it by the bride. I didn't wear white to either of my weddings so wouldn't have minded. I wanted to be the only one in a veil though so definitely no-one else gets to have a veil and I want the biggest bouquet.

EuroShaggleton Tue 07-May-13 22:46:42

I had never heard about this "rule" until a couple of years ago, and before that I had worn white to a wedding (although the dress did have a print on it, so not terribly bridal; and the bride at that wedding was a rockchick who wore purple!). My StepMIL, who I get on with very well, wore a cream dress to my wedding. I didn't care, but other people did notice and comment. And she does stand out a bit in the group photo.

DonDrapersAltrEgoBigglesDraper Tue 07-May-13 22:22:40

Ha, Toothpaste, I bet you're regretting starting this thread now, right? grin

Pigsmummy Tue 07-May-13 22:14:33


raisah Tue 07-May-13 22:07:45

Absolutely not. Asian brides traditionally wear red & the last wedding I went to one of the guests wore a red sari. It was heavily embroidered like a bridal sari & she wore heavy makeup so lots of people tbought tbat she was the bride. Lots of people disapproved of the wannabe bride.

Helltotheno Tue 07-May-13 22:02:38

people getting narked about someone wearing a non-wedding dress that is white need to get over themselves.

Exactly. In fact this whole BS list of wedding dos and don'ts needs to be gotten over; at this point, I've seen everything at weddings, from black to white to everything in between, and even jeans, and guess what, the sky didn't fall in. hmm

More to life...

PowerPants Tue 07-May-13 21:57:14

Oh NO! I wore a cream trouser suit and cream hat to a friend's wedding once! I thought because it was a trouser suit it'd be OK! blush

I am ashamed.

notso Tue 07-May-13 14:24:55

non-wedding dress that should be.

notso Tue 07-May-13 14:24:11

I guess your story just reinforces people's view that a person who did it might be a bit attention seeking...

I think it's safe to say a wedding guest who wears a wedding dress to a wedding is more than a little attention seeking!

But really, people getting narked about someone wearing a non-wedding that is white need to get over themselves.

DailyNameChanger Tue 07-May-13 14:11:55

Feelings seem to run high about this but best not. I saw a beach wedding in Mexico years ago and one of the guests totally outshone the bride in a gold dress and accessories. Did anyone bitch about her? No they did not. They slated a slightly tubby nondescript woman in a non wedding dress style white dress! I think some people see it as bad for and others genuinely don't know it's not the done thing.

MummaBubba123 Tue 07-May-13 13:49:14

Don't do it. Whether it's inappropriate or not, you're likely to have niggling doubts and feel a tad uncomfortable about wearing it - which might spoil your evening.

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