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AIBU?

to think you should NEVER trust a woman who doesnt have female friends?

191 replies

HallnotOates · 30/08/2011 11:12

and wonder how they have not accrued any in their life - or what they have done to them to piss them off - or why they can ONLY relate to men?

OP posts:
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mayorquimby · 30/08/2011 11:17

Surely the "who doesn't have female friends in this is redundant."

Smile

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PeggyCarter · 30/08/2011 11:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mayorquimby · 30/08/2011 11:18

*should read
Surely the "who doesn't have female friends" in this is redundant.

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TheMonster · 30/08/2011 11:19

That makes me untrustworthy then!

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wannaBe · 30/08/2011 11:20

yabu.

I have mostly male friends and have always got on far better with men. Predominantly because I can't stand the bitchyness of women and the group clique mentality that exists amongst most groups of women.

Most men I know are straight talking and say it like it is. Most women I know will be sweetness and light to your face then bitch about you behind your back. No thanks.

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SingleFosterMum · 30/08/2011 11:20

I agree, although it is a sweeping generalisation, the sort of woman who says " I prefer men's company to women " is usually not my cup of tea.
I quite like both !

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luxuryhamper · 30/08/2011 11:21

i prefer animals

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MillyR · 30/08/2011 11:21

If a woman says something like, "I don't usually have female friends, but I get on with you."

Then that is a huge warning sign as far as I'm concerned.

YANBU.

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2littlegreenmonkeys · 30/08/2011 11:23

YABU.
You wouldn't be able to trust me then, I have only one GOOD female friend who I hardly ever see as we live so far away from each other and I do not drive.

I have acquaintances I know and like but would not call real friends as such just people I know. I get on much better with men and always have done.

I am not a horrid person and I do not piss people off, well at least I don't think I do as people seem to be happy to have me around. I go out of my way to be nice to anyone I meet, male or female and treat them as I would wish to be treat myself

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Xiaoxiong · 30/08/2011 11:23

I have gone through periods of my life where female friends and I have drifted away from each other for various reasons and then reconnected with them later, or I have made new friends.

I would be shocked and upset if someone said I couldn't be trusted because at various times I didn't have any particular female friends but did have male friends.

I find female friends care a lot more about staying in touch regularly, so it takes more work to maintain contact and it's easier to drift apart if there are circumstances which have made me a distant friend for a time, eg. having a baby, moving house, moving abroad, getting subsumed into a relationship, starting a new job etc. I don't think that makes either me or them untrustworthy!!

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HallnotOates · 30/08/2011 11:24

Yes agree with general cynicism about friends but I know of several women who upon meeting their H( who i know) seem to come with no old mates.
that is odd

OP posts:
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usualsuspect · 30/08/2011 11:25

I have friends of both sexes ,If I like someone I like them ,its irrelevant if they are male or female

I don't tend to generalise about either sex

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wannaBe · 30/08/2011 11:25

but I don't think it has to be about preference though?

I certainly don't seek out male friends over female ones, I will talk to and form friendships with anyone. But my strongest friendships and my longest lasting ones have been predominantly (but not exclusively) with men.

I find this notion that we must attract to type quite odd - what's wrong with being friends with men rather than women or vice versa?

I think it's more odd that people seem to have an issue with people of the opposite sex actually being able to be friends - just what problem is it you have with men?

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2littlegreenmonkeys · 30/08/2011 11:26

I don't see why it is odd, not everyone is a 'people person'. It doesn't necessarily mean they are untrustworthy or odd Confused

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BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 30/08/2011 11:26

YABU - some women relate better to men....I have a lot of male and female friends but a lot of the time male friends are easier and a lot less complicated...not all but some!!

My BIL finds it easier to relate to women and so has a lot of women friends but not male friends - does that make him hard to trust???

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Cheria · 30/08/2011 11:27

YABU. I have one maybe two close female friends. They trust me implicitly, as I do them. Quality not quantity. Hmm

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Chocobo · 30/08/2011 11:28

I really cannot understand why it is still ok to discriminately make huge sweeping statements based on gender. Can you imagine it to be ok to say:

"Most white people I know are straight talking and say it like it is. Most black people I know will be sweetness and light to your face then bitch about you behind your back. No thanks."

If it is not ok to make these sort of assertions based on race then why is it ok to do it based on gender?

Anyway IME women are not generally bitchier than men. Yes some women can be be bitchy but then some men can be just as bitchy.

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MillyR · 30/08/2011 11:30

The OP never mentioned having lots of friends. I took it to mean people who have no female friends at all.

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limetrees · 30/08/2011 11:31

YABU. The most manipulative "friend" I have ever had was female. For this reason, I am very very wary of making new friends and I will not ever rush a friendship - will keep things very low key for a long time before trusting someone, female or male.

Women can be so supportive and lovely but some can also be deceitful, nasty and manipulative.

Also, people drift from friends - my best friend is abroad (due to her DP's job) - perhaps that makes me untrustworthy!

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LadyBeagleEyes · 30/08/2011 11:31

I have friends of both sexes, none of my female friends are bitchy or cliquey, that's a ridiculous generalisation.

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AuntieMonica · 30/08/2011 11:31

and i don't see why the gender of someone's friends would make them untrustworthy

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raffle · 30/08/2011 11:31

Mmmm, I would be wondering why she didn't get on with other women, or preferred men as mates. I can tell you it would not make me dis trust her, but it would make me think she was a bit odd.

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Chocobo · 30/08/2011 11:33

To answer your question OP I think you are being a little unreasonable to judge people solely on who their friends are but, I would be a bit mistrustful of a woman who claims they do not have any female friends because they don't like women as they cannot like themselves very much can they?

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Itsjustafleshwound · 30/08/2011 11:33

YABU ... how bloody Sexist!!

It is comments like this that REALLY piss me off ....

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HallnotOates · 30/08/2011 11:33

i think to have a balance of types of mates is ideal surely - not all black or white( dont think we need to veer off into race here) or all men or all women.

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