Relationship with nursery

[mikil]

My dd is about to start nursery at 13 months.
I'm sure she will be fine but am worried about my relationship with the nursery.
Don't want to be a pushy mum, but at the same time I want to be involved.
Any tips?

Hi mikil,

If the Nursery is anything like mine then they will welcome you being pushy! The Manageress asked me to write down all the specifics about ds's routine, likes/dislikes, time of naps, duration, things I definitely wanted done a specific way etc etc. And they keep a written log of times he eats, how much he eats, time and duration of naps, nappy changes (wet/soiled). So that stuff is taken care of. Also, they are only too willing to tell me about new things he's done.... has peeved me off in the past coz they were the first to spot his first tooth! So I felt a bit put out.
They also organise parents evening where dp and I can talk to them about how ds is progressing.

I thinkyou will be pleasantly surprised. And don't be worried about being pushy as it makes their life easier too if the child settles quickly.

HTH

PS: Welcome to Mumsnet too, apologies if you have posted before.

My nursery is the same. They asked me all about DS when he first started there (at 9 months) and give me a run down on his day when I collect him in the afternoon.
If I tell them something (like I'm introducing cow milk to wean him off formula) then they ask if I want him to have some at nursery, what time, etc. and then let me know how he gets on.
A good nursery will want you to feel like you still are a part of your child's day and ensure you're comfortable with what's going on.

My DD started nursery for two days a week at 21 weeks and she is now 15 months, and she thoroughly adores it. She starts getting excited as soon as we pull up outside. I always have a quick chat morning and night with her key workers or the manager/owner. I get on well with them and they chat to me about DD's day and how she is developing both at nursery and at home. At the end of each day I also get a report on what she has eaten and drunk, her nap time, her nappy changes, etc.

When we started we were asked for a note of DD's current routine which they worked with for the first few weeks, gradually bringing her into their routine with time.

Try not oto worry too much. Sending our DD to nursery was the best decision we ever made. I could never have realised how much she would have gained from it. What she gets up to always suproses me with all the painting, glueing, water and sand work, singing and dancing, role playing, puzzles and games, outside play and even a trip to the farm two weeks ago. Typically too, Dd will always nap at the same time every day for nursery (she is a devil for not napping at home) and she will eat everything up whatever she is given for them too.

When my ds started part-time nursery aged 23m, he was put in with the 2-3 year-olds ie the right age-group. However he is very advanced in his use and understanding of language, although at the time his actual speech was unclear, and I noticed that the staff were treating him like the other toddlers, most of whom were not yet speaking very much. I discussed this with the principal within a day or two, and asked specifically that staff should actively listen to him and talk to him properly like they would with an older child. The principal had a meeting with staff and the following week I could see a distinct difference in their behaviour with ds, and, as a result, he was clearly happier as well. So, I think, a degree of pushyness is a good idea. They may be 'professionals' but you know your dd best.

Just found this thread and had to post to agree with everyone else - be pushy - I was not and now the nursery have started behaving so badly that tomorrow morning I am giving them notice that I am removing my daughter from the nursery. Situation is that that daughter is one of the youngest in her group, although not the youngest. Nursery have told me that children are moved up to the next class strictly on the basis of age and birthdays - I know for a fact that this is not always the case. My daughter's friends have all moved up and she screams when now left at the nursery as none of her friends are in her room and all of the other children are so much younger (this from a child who may have whinged before but never screamed and cried to the extent that I could hear her in the car park as I was leaving). She always asks if she can be with her friends - this is heartbreking for a mother to listen to. Although I have requested that they move her up to be with her friends they refuse to do so until the "designated" date - I might have put up with this but this is the THIRD time they have done this to my daughter - the children whose parents make a fuss seem to get leapfrogged over the non fussers. So DO be pushy. I have decided to remove my daughter as I am sick of this treatment - and this is from a VERY well known national chain!
P>S> - the only reason I am posting so late is that I am writing combined notice and complaint letter.