advice - go back now or wait?

[SevernTrentWater]

I want to know, what would you do? and why?
Do i keep on working while little one is 4 months - 14 months,
or wait til lo is 14 months?

i'm back at work, 4 days full time, well it's professional training, i'm not yet qualified in my field, i like it and hate the work at the same time, but what i really upsetting me is the childcare - i'm not happy, tried nursery, tried childminder, still not happy and i've noticed changes in my los behaviour - no longer sleeps threw, wakes 5 times a night, irritable and clingy.

i know my dp and others will be very dissapointed in me if i suspend my training now, but whether i continue or take time out i'll still graduate the same time.

thing is, it's 12 months full time (no part time option) - done 1 month already, but when i finish i only need to work one/two days a week til she goes to school.

is it better me keep going now - lo is 4 months - even though i constantly worry, hence the half hearted thing with work, or will i feel the same way if i put lo in nursery at 14 months,

my mum seemms to think better to put lo in childcare while a baby, get this career under my belt then take time out from 14 months til she goes to school.

( i graduate the same time because of the delay between clompleting my professional training and actually qualifying, it's about 7 months!)

I'd probably be tempted to suspend if it doesn't feel right at the moment. Although if you have tried both a nursery and a childminder in a month, it's not surprising your baby is unsettled. Either would take a month or so to settle to I expect.

My dd went to nursery from 8m, she's now 15m and I do feel better about her being there now than I did then. Not just because we're used to it, but at this age they start to get something out of it, like enjoying the messy play, painting, etc.

what would I do - suspend it and spend time with my baby
why - because you can go back to this training later but never go back to those four days per week of your child's early months.

I found it much easier working a 4 day week when DS and DD were babies than when they were older. We were lucky because we had a great nursery. When they got older, particularly when they were at school holidays, inset days etc made it v difficult to do a proper job, so for what it's worth I would try and stick to the training for now so you can do the flexible job later on. I would also say give childcare more than a month before changing to give it a chance to work and not to unsettle your lo. That said with hindsight I would have prefered to spend more time with mine when they were little if we could have afforded it.

Go for it! Or you will never leave baby and will be sittting at home filling sorry for yourself.

I'm not following all of this, I think, but from what I understand your LO is in nursery now at 4 months. I do think that's a bit soon if it can be avoided and so I'd say wait till 14 months (not sure why it has to be then, brain a bit slow tonight I think).