How will I cope going back to work?

[McAli]

Hi All,

I'm new - first day on the forum. I've a wonderful eight month baby boy - my first child.

I have put my head in the sand when it comes to going back to work. I guess I just don't want to leave him. I am due back in three months. My friends look aghast when I tell them this because it can take months they say it takes months to get a nursery place or child minder.

Now I am beginning to panic, not just because of my non-existent childcare situation, but also because I am finding it difficult getting myself ready and out the door by 10am.

How will I cope getting ready and being in the office door before 9am every morning?

Have you started looking into childcare? You need to start tackling that as the scariest thing is not knowing who is going to be looking after yiour child.

And you will get out of the door on time because you have to. It's as simple as that. You quickly build up your own morning routines.

Agree with pointy.

You first need to get your head out of the sand! Sort the childcare which is the most important thing, and then work from there. Once you are being paid to be somewhere at 9 am, you'll manage it. If you ever have another child, you'll feel the same again: 'Help, how can I possibly manage with two?!' But you just do it. Getting kids up and out is one of those things that expands to fill the time available. When I was on maternity leave, I didn't imagine how I'd ever get out the front door by lunch time. Once I was back at work I was out before 8 am. It will be ok. You'll find the groove and all will fall into place. But you do need to get your head out of the sand first!

I always struggled to get out of the house for 8am start, but I did it somehow. Now I am on maternity leave again, I wonder how I ever did it! But agree you just do.

You really do, as urgent priority need to sort out childcare. You cannot just give your LO over to anyone. It takes time to source, check out, and have a trial/settling in period before work.

Or. think seriously about whether you want to go back to work at all - is it an option not to? If it is an option, maybe consider not doing it for another couple of months, in order to ensure you get the childcare right. I put DD into her nursery when she was 9months, and had it organised by the time she was 6 months - that was still too late - the nursery I really wanted her in had a 2.5 year waiting list and she is only just in there now at aged 3. This new baby, not even born yet, is already on the waiting list.

Thank you for your advice. I am going to phone my boss (new boss who has stated no part-time, no flexi-time and no working from home) tomorrow and get the exact start date agreed.

My husband works from home, so we are going to work out what is achievable for him and then look at nurseries and child minders in our local area. Thanks for the kick up the bum!

Ali

Has the no part time, no flexi and no working from home been looked at through the formal Flexible Working arrangements though? They cannot just say no. You have to state a formal legitimate argument as to why they should consider it, and they have to give a legitimate legal argument as to why 'operationally' it would not be viabe to allow you those flexible working options, that there are NO options available - that seems harsh, to not even allow flexible working times.

It's worth doing because it will stop you panicking in the middle of the night, ali