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Original poster

Suggestions for cover up pregnancy interview outfit anyone?

53 replies

WideWebWitch · 12/05/2003 12:24

I've got an interview soon at 13 weeks pregnant and can't think what to wear to cover it up, any bright ideas? If I get the job I'll admit to being pregnant and see what they say but in the meantime where should I go for a good but not too expensive suit? Nothing in my wardrobe fits anymore - TIA for any ideas.

OP posts:
monkey · 14/05/2003 10:08

Good luck too, www - sorry, can't help with clothing dilema either other than agree formal is best - I can't even get myself dressed for a day of domestic drudgery at the moment, so I wish you luck with both!

Marina · 14/05/2003 10:19

Good luck, www - as someone who at 28 weeks already resembles a tuber on legs I did not feel qualified to offer camouflage tips for the interview, but do hope you get offered the job.
OldDragon, you are taxing us all as well as making us laugh! There are theories about, you know...

jasper · 14/05/2003 10:50

www are you trying to conceal your pregnancy until the job is (hopefully ) offered to you?
Do you thing that is fair to your future employer? Obviously they are not allowed to discriminate on the basis of you being pregnant.
They might be pissed off that you failed to tell them.

How would you feel if you interviewed people for , say, a job as a nanny and gave it to the best candidate only to find out she had failed to tell you she was pregnant?

bossykate · 14/05/2003 11:53

jasper, firms are not supposed to discriminate, but they do. until pregnant women are given a fair chance at interview, they are entitled to take whatever concealment steps are necessary to ensure they are judged on the basis of their cv for the job and not just dismissed because they are pregnant, imo. you don't stop needing a salary just because you are pregnant!

Mum2Toby · 14/05/2003 12:04

I just think that it's shocking that women still feel like they have to hide their pregnancy to get equally considered for a job!

You don't have to pre-warn potential employers if you have an illness that may require a long term absence from work!!!!

SoupDragon · 14/05/2003 12:15

It's certainly not dishonest to tell them once the job has been offered. It would be rather off to tell them after you've accepted & signed on the dotted line but at the end of the day, they can't not hire you just because you're pregnant.

Mum2Toby · 14/05/2003 12:33

Soupie - unfortunately, even though technically they can't use that as the reason not to hire you, but it still happens all the time.

florenceuk · 14/05/2003 12:41

But is it really unfair? I'm just stressing out now because I suspect my nanny is pregnant (her daughter is 14 mths and her tummy is bulging suspiciously) and this will probably make it impossible for her to continue looking after my DS as well, which is a shame because he really loves her and her DD - but I can't see her looking after 3 under 3! If she had been pregnant when I first hired her, then I would have said no as it would have been too disruptive to have somebody leave so soon after starting. I know that there is no guarantee that a single unattached nanny would have stayed as long, but it is different when you know it is going to happen.

SoupDragon · 14/05/2003 12:43

Oh, I do realise that. Part of me can see where they're coming from (wasting time training someone who may well leave 6 months down the line and not come back) but that doesn't make it right or fair. However, if the job offer is suddenly withdrawn when you tell them you're pregnant, they wouldn't really have a leg to stand on at a tribunal.

Mum2Toby · 14/05/2003 12:55

florenceuk - too right it's unfair!! What about an office job? I can see your point about a Nanny. It's a tough one.

Soupie - if the offer is given in writing then fair enough, but what if they just tell you over the phone...... then withdraw the offer?? And a lot of the jobs that I've had I've no intention of staying for more than a few months anyway and that's nothing to do with being pregnant. Also, I only had 5 mths off work then went back fulltime.
I'm a Contractor so when I left for Maternity leave they didn't keep my job open. I found another one though.

Tossum · 14/05/2003 13:14

Dunno if its too late, but my misses has a nightmare trying to get any half-flattering maternity stuff. Plus no bras fit her cos her chest is small, with a D cup. Anyway the answer is H&M, apparently. We live in oxfordshire, but often travel to Swansea, and whenever we do we always have to pit stop in cardiff on the way for an H&M spree. so there you go.

quackers · 14/05/2003 14:36

Tossum - what a name! How did you think that one up??
xx

Mum2Toby · 14/05/2003 14:41

Quackers - maybe it's best not to know that.

quackers · 14/05/2003 14:44

I was hoping he'd give a really smart reply and turn my uneventful afternoon at work into a fun one!
How's it hangin' Tossum?
Sorry everyone that was a 'bit below the belt'

sobernow · 14/05/2003 15:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
WideWebWitch · 14/05/2003 15:20

Thanks for the advice everyone. I got a suit and top in M&S which I'll keep since of course a size 18 skirt will still fit me in a months time A size 18 skirt (14 jacket) - I CRIED, I can tell you.

Jasper, to answer your question, no, I don't intend telling them at interview. If I get an offer and accept it then I'll come clean. If they then withdraw the offer on the basis that I'm pregnant then I don't want to work for them anyway(not that I'll have a choice).

I had a good read of the "should I tell a prospective employer I'm pregnant?" thread before I even applied for this job and decided I would apply and attend if asked for interview. We really need the money now and we will need it even more once this baby is born. I absolutely cannot afford any more time off work (I've been a SAHM for 5 years) and my loss of earnings so far are already into the hundreds of thousands. I only managed my 5 years as a SAHM by selling my flat in London and living off the equity after my separation from DH. I now have no pension (and neither am I allowed to pay into one if I'm not working), no savings, am unable to get a mortgage and I NEED to go back to work. Dp earns next to nothing so I will be the main breadwinner. I know I can do the job and do it well although yes, I will need time off in November and for a while afterwards. But I fully intend to go back after this baby and I believe I'll be a good, reliable employee. I'm doing something good for society (but dp/me mainly, I know) too in having another baby and I don't think I should feel guilty about needing to earn a living as well. Thanks for all the good wishes, I re-read the interview tip thread too so I'll let you know how I get on. BTW Jasper, this wasn't all aimed at you, just that you asked the question!

OP posts:
Mum2Toby · 14/05/2003 15:23

Good Luck again WWW.

florenceuk · 14/05/2003 15:45

Sorry WWW, wasn't meant to get at you at all, just trying to point out employer's point of view. As an economist, I'm aware that regardless of how "fair" it seems, what appears like a cost to an employer will get factored in there somewhere. What this means in practice is that those of us who have some feature that is not so attractive (like being pregnant or wanting to work part-time) have to make up for it by being better at everything else - something I'm sure you won't have a problem with. Good luck!

Original poster
WideWebWitch · 14/05/2003 16:03

I know you weren't Florenceuk, no offence taken

OP posts:
Pimpernel · 14/05/2003 17:36

WWW - slightly off topic here, and I may be wrong, but I thought the idea of stakeholder pensions was that you could pay into them when you weren't working?

Good luck with the interview!

emsiewill · 14/05/2003 18:09

Pimpernel, I was going to say the same thing - anyone can pay up to £3,600 pa per year into a stakeholder, children, unemployed, SAHMs, anyone.... (anyone who's got the money that is)

jasper · 14/05/2003 19:18

WWW I've been thinking about you all day and hoping you did not find my last post offensive in any way.
I can see why you might not want to disclose your pregnancy yet but was just a bit worried you would get other colleagues backs up by not coming clean, not that I am saying they would have any right to feel miffed.
However you are quite right to want to be judged on your own merits without complicationas and on further consideration I think a good employer would see it as a positive thing you were pregnant when you applied for the job. ( bear with me and hopefully this will make sense)as it shows you really want the job. You plan to return to work, and being a mum already you know the score ( all things ebeing equal, of course these things can change). In that respect you are a better bet than a non pregnant woman(who could get pregnant tomorrow) with no kids as she would be less likely to have made up her mind about the longer term, whereas you have long term plans already in place and they include this job.

Good luck!

Original poster
WideWebWitch · 14/05/2003 19:41

Jasper, thanks for thinking of me, I wasn't offended by your post either, in fact no-one offended me at all! I hope I don't come across as mega touchy or anything but I realise re-reading my 3.20pm post that I did sound it, didn't I? I suppose I was practising the justification for myself too really. Anyway it's all academic, I haven't even had the interview yet!

OP posts:
Tinker · 14/05/2003 19:42

www - just caught up with this thread, lots of luck. Are you going to be an all padded shoulders brusque professional now

bayleaf · 14/05/2003 20:17

I've just been selecting an interview outfit for tomorrow - trying to find one that doesn't make me look pregnant - and I'm NOT!!! AT least your size 18 skirt isn't just bulging with fat!

Good luck with your interview WWW - FWIW I'd do exactly what you are - and I've certainly no intention of telling the panel at mine that I'm in the middle of ivf!

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