no confidence and can't kick start this process of going back to work...

[mousie]

I have now been an SAHM for five years - and not raelly enjoyed the experience very much. Though instinctively felt it was the right thing to do - and both my babies were very difficult and close together - colic, reflux, the works. I am only just now getting the odd full nights sleep. Anyway, I am desperate to go back to work part time but just don't know where to start. I have a good cv (oxford degree, BBC career) but can't contemplate a return to my former life - hours so dreadful and pay insufficient to cover even a bit of a nanny! The obvious thing would be to kick start some sort of freelance writing career from home but I so lack the confidence to cold call and get started. Also my brain is like porridge these days - or worse than porridge. Anyone know some good (cheap or free) careers advice places or how to boost my confidence in some ways, it is such a vicious, destructive circle feeling so low in work self- esteem.

I know how you feel having been a SAHM for nine years. I feel exactly the same as you: want to go back to work, but I falter at every hurdle. I can't offer any advice, but will watch this thread with interest.

Oh just a thought, is there any retraining you could do? Might ease you back into the world of work gently....

mousie, hi I'm sorry you are feeling so low, I know how you feel. One place that might help with advice is your local job centre, I think these days they are geared up for more than just jobs . Or possibly Learn Direct? I've seen them advertised on TV.

Good luck, I hope someone comes on soon with better advice than me!

If you want to write, how about doing so for something like an NCT newsletter or any other voluntary organisation - a couple of articles on parenting or your birth stories or your fave hooby or an opinion piece. Seeing your story in print might just boost your confidence enough to help you on the way to cold-calling.

Or talk to a volunteer bureau. A good manager htere will help tease out what you're interested in and you won't be comparing salaries and perhaps making a potentially wrong choice swayed by salary - as there isn't any!!! And it's excellent experience for building up contacts and re-building self-esteem (BTDT).

SueW's idea is a excellent.
I was going to suggest you go do some "gentle" work to get you back into the swing of things before trying to freelance.

Get in somewhere that isn't too taxing on the brain, and that has a team of staff. So you could meet new people and have their support, whilst you adjust to working life again!

I imagine its very normal to feel this way after five years of being sahm. I went back to parttime work when dd was 3 mths and i felt nervous as hell, so i'm sure after five years i would be feeling the same as you!

But i think this is one of those things, throwing yourself into it will be the only way your confidence will come back.

Good luck!

thank you - the volunteering idea is a very good one. salary would be great (my husband is off work at the moment - made redundant in november and still no job) however, i can't see myself paying the mortgage quite yet - I think I need a long term ease myself back agenda.