Back from maternity leave and my line manager has changed personality!!!

[greenkiwi03]

I came back to work from maternity leave and my line manager (LM) has changed personality over night.
Background - The Company has recently made department changes due to a restructure and this has had a profound effect on my LM. I know she's unhappy, due to her constant back stabbing about our boss and head office, talk of her pay inequality (and lack of preferential treatment) compared with other managers etc etc.
I used to be sympathetic, try to offer advice and listen, but don't anymore. I get on and do my job and keep my nose down and work hard.
When my daughter got constantly sick from starting nursery, I had to adjust my work hours to part time and now things have changed. I work late to meet deadlines and often take work home, so I can fit all my work in to three days. I'm OK with this because I enjoy my job.
Conversation has deteriorated and now when I get to work on Monday, within 2-3 minutes sitting at my desk I get constant questions about where my work stuff is at and not even a ?hello how was your weekend etc?? The only time my LM speaks to me, is about work tasks and it's usually a question like "where are you at with ...?" followed by a form of criticism or pressure to complete what I?m working on. Note the company is performing well £ and they have funds to get another person to job share.
I?m trying to stay strong and happy, but all this negativity is wearing me down. Any suggestions on improving this situation (as she?s not going to change or leave anytime soon) would be much appreciated.

She sounds to me like she may be resentful of you and what she perceives as a preferential arrangement for you. I have no idea why she doesn't leave if she thinks everything is so terrible. This is one of my pet hates - people moaning but refusing to leave, just destroys any hope of a pleasant working environment for everyone else.

As far as how I would tackle it there are three options.

1. Have it out with her.
2. Feign concern over the change you noticed in her. Bang on and on about stress and how you are worried she is not coping at all well etc etc. She may cheer up just to get you to shut up about it.
3. Before she has a chance to say anything to you in the mornings say, 'Morning! How was your evening/ weekend? Let me just tell you where I am with...'

I am a bit of a coward so would do anything rather than resort to 1) and you still have to go on working with her so it may be worth trying something else first.

if she's like this with everyone i think she sounds incredibly stressed

If you've been on maternity leave it doesn't sound 'overnight', and it sounds as though there's a substantial and reasonable background to the way she is feeling/acting at the moment, nothing to do with you personally. Obviously it doesn't make her behaviour acceptable, but there are obviously things making her very unhappy and demotivated at work.

Her problems are not your problems as such, but understanding the reason for something helps you work out how to tackle it. I would suggest you request a meeting with her, or a coffee externally if you do that kind of thing, mentions your concerns to her, explain how you would like her behaviour to change and why.

You mention that you can fit all your work into 3 days, but then when talking about your boss keeping on top of you with your work, you say they could afford to get a job share.

Is your arrangement working as is or not? I've no idea whether your boss is justified when chasing you about work deadlines or not, obviously, but your mention of a job share implies that actually you may not think the arrangement is working brilliantly. Have you raised the question of getting in additional help?

Thanks everyone,

As a newbie to Mumsnet, your feedback has helped me get the balls to face this and I've since organised a meeting with the dragon lady! Wish me luck.