Do you agree it is wrong for a manager to tell her pregnant employee that she could 'just get a little part time job in a shop or a pub afterwards'?

[dollybird]

This happenened to my friend and is the latest in a long line of stuff which started well before she found out she was pregnant. My boss thinks it's outrageous and thought she should complain (she thinks she should have complained a long time ago and that was before she knew my friend was pregnant).

Sounds a little like what i'm going through now.

totally and utterly wrong. is there someone she can talk to? a union for example? he needs a kick in the goolies to be given some equal opportunities training

Unbelievable... (yes, I agree).

she has joined the union. she's been taking notes of stuff that's been going on for months now, but is still wary of taking any formal action in case it goes against her. S told me in confidence that she was pregnant because she was only 6 weeks but wanted someone at work to know in case anything happened. We had gone away from our desks to talk about it for maybe 10 mins. when she got back her boss (who used to be my boss - thank god not any more) demanded to know what we had been talking about, whether it was work or personal. My friend said a bit of both and they basically backed her into a corner until she told them because she thought she'd be in masive trouble if she didn't. she said she would make up the time. They treat her like shit.

I was told this by a boss of mine when I was in my early 20s and no thoughts of getting pregnant. He prefaced it with "I don't believe in women working in proper jobs, so why don't you..."

Thankfully he's now dead.

dollybird he sounds horrendous. I'm 99.999 per cent sure that she can get confidential advice from the union without committing to making a formal complaint. Women really shouldn;t have to put up with dinosaurs and bullies like this. (well, no-one should, but in so many cases it's the women at the receiving end)

She absolutely should complain - a very good case for sex discrimination. At the very least, she must keep a very accurate record of all comments (even those said in "jest") in case she wants to bring a case in the future or the discrimination intensifies or she loses job as result of pregnancy or Mat leave. Shocking!!

She's keeping notes of everything. that team is a nightmare and unfortunately i've just been dragged back into the thick of it as they've asked me to help out even though I left in December. Stupid thing is they got rid of someone last year and they're effectively trying to push my friend out, but they need my help because they can't cope with the workload! crazy

If she doesn't complain because she "doesn't want it to go against her" then she should be prepared for the fact that this poor treatment will continue. Why would it stop?

And a tribunal (and an HR dept) would expect these things to be raised sooner rather than later (so that the problems can be addressed), so it might 'go against her' if she bottled it up, and then cracked and tried to take action at that point.

But obv it depends on your friend and her attitude to all of this. If she is OK about putting up with it then sometimes rockign the boat is not the right thing to do. I would kick up a stink if it were me, especially if she suspects they are trying to push her out.

She should also be prepared to answer the question "Why didn't you say anything when it happened?" And there is never a good answer to that question.

Has she given formal written notice of her pregnancy. As they as they know about it, it is probably in her interest to be able to prove they know about it.