Time off work when childminder was ill - did I do the right thing? (A bit long, sorry)

[hidetheribbons]

Hope some HR/manager types can help me. This has been preying on my mind.

In December my childminder was off sick. She looks after DD2, 19 months. (DD1 is at school). I work 4.5 hours per day Tues-Fri.
On Tues I phoned the office and explained that my CM was sick and couldn't go in.

My boss (a mum of 3!) was v. annoyed and said she had some urgent work (which she wasn't expecting). I went into the office with DD2 to print the work out so I could work on it in the evening after the DDs were in bed. I only managed about 2 hours as I was so tired! I also found lots of mistakes the next day so had to do it again.

My boss ended up sending the work to a freelancer as I couldn't finish it in time. It was also more complicated than she expected.

This was v stressful as I was trying to look after DD2 and do the work!

The CM ended up being off for 4 days, a full week to me. I made the time up over the next week, using overtime acrrued, coming in an extra day once CM was better, and time worked in the evenings/while DD2 napped. It was very stressful but I did it. I also offered to work over the weekend but my boss declined.

I explained to my boss that I did all I could to keep working and that I don't have any family etc nearby to look after DD2. I don't want to farm her out to other mums from school etc as I feel it is asking too much of them and anyway they might not be available at such short notice.

It doesn't happen very often but it has been bothering me in case it happens again.

Was there more I could have done?

Just how far should you go to make alternative arrangements for childcare? I really don't have much option, that I am happy with.

Please advise! TIA

You are entitled to unpaid time off work to deal with a family emergency but on the basis that it will be only for as long as is required to resolve the problem. see www.businesslink.gov.uk/bdotg/action/detail?type=RESOURCES&itemId=1074453342 for the sort of advice employers get on this situation. I think you need to try to establish some sort of second line childcare for peace of mind in case this happens again. In my experience as a manager for a fairly large female workforce I think up to about 4 days should give someone time to make arrangements - a week is a bit long and I would be surprised if anyone could make new arrangements in less than 2 days. I would suggest that staff took leave if this sort of situation carried on longer than a week. Hope this is helpful.

Thanks Higgle. I have looked at that website but I wanted some opinions from people in real life.

It doesn't sound like the 4 days I took was an excessive amount of time, so I am reassured by that.

What worries me is the idea of making back up arrangements - an alternative childminder can't keep a place free just in case I need her. I'm not happy with nursery care because I don't think it is good for the under 3s. I don't have family nearby, my parents said I could ask them if I was stuck but they are in their late 70s and live 4 hours' drive away and they have to stay B & B because our house isn't big enough.

I don't want to "use" my friends by imposing on them at the last minute. One or two people have offered to help for a few hours. DD2 would probably have to be farmed out to various people. Looking after an extra child for even 1 day is a lot to ask and I would feel awkward about asking.

I also have to consider DD2's interests, she is really happy with her childminder and might not like being farmed out to lots of different people.

If it happens again my boss said I could either:
a) take it as emergency time off, unpaid (not keen)
b) take it as authorised leave and make the time up, paid (my preferred choice)
c) take a day off sick, paid (which means lying - something I don't like doing. And my boss would be suspicious - I haven't had any sick leave for 3 years. Which makes me think I am almost "entitled" to go sick for a day or two ...
d)take annual leave - not a chance - I only get 20 days!

Looks like I would have to muddle through somehow. Hope it doesn't happen again for a long time...

Anyone else want to give their views?

Its a difficult one, the law only allows you to have time off to make other arrangements but in reality we would rather be at home with our DC when ill.

I would probably go for option b

Nursery?

I honestly believe this an impossible one. "Time to make alternative arrangements" - my contract gives me this. Trouble is I am in foreign country far from family and friends. All the people i know work full time. If dd is ill, I try to work from home or take hol. And me and Dh take turns where possible. Forutnately we've only been faced with the odd cold/bug. Faced with say a whole week, there are not many options. You basically have to take unpaid time off or holiday. It is one of the big buggers of WOHM mums.

This website lets you search for emergency childcare - nurseries, childminders or nannies. Once you have registered and put in your postcode, you will see a list of registered child carers who take emergency short term children. I guess you could have a look at who does this locally to you and check them out now in order to get an idea of what might be suitable.
Would be especially good if your CM becoms unwell for a longer period at all.

Hi there.

As I understand it emergency leave is to allow you enough time to make alternative provisions and whilst I appreciate that you don't like leaving your DD2 with random people 4 days is quite a lot to take off because your C/M is ill.

We use a c/m as well because we appreciate the one to one care for DS. However if she was sick then DH and I would alternate time off but also have a couple of other options which is an emergency C/M and Mner ( worth asking if any Mumsnetters are registered in your area) or at a push our neighbour. I don't like leaving DS with different people either, but sometimes it has to be done because its a little unfair to expect your work to have to cope with 3 sets of absences i.e. C/m, DC and yourself.

TBH I think the offer of option b is more than fair and few employers would offer it.

Sorry if I come across harshly, I don't mean to.

if the chils is under 5, both parents have an entitlement to 13 weeks unpaid leave to look after the chid once the child is 5 and not disabled (age 18 if disabled) PARENTAL LEAVE COMES TO AN END.

There is also special unpaid/paid leave you should be entitled to. This is for immediate needs or cm not turn up.

ACAS is a great web site all info on here most employers follow their reccomendations.

And if they do not you ring ACAS they will set you straight.

www.wirral.nhs.uk, www.acas.co.uk..

this hasn't happened to me yet, although cm has had hols when i have had to work. luckily i get 5 days dependency leave a year, which is perhaps something you should speak to your employer about hidetheribbons.

ask your cm who she recommends for cover, they all tend to know each other because they train etc together and go to same groups. or they do here anyway.

Thanks everyone. I don't think there are any alternative arrangements I could make that I would be happy with. I would rather just stay at home with my little one and do some evenings and weekends to make the time up. Fortunately the nature of the job does allow for some flexibility. I was just shocked at the lack of understanding from someone who is a mother of 3!

TBH hidetheribbons I think the reason that your boss isn't understanding is precisely because she is a mother of 3.

If she took time off every time one of her children or nanny was ill then I expect that she would be off at least once a month. She probably has very complicated arrangements in the background to handle this happening so that her work record isn't impacted too much.

Its fair enough when your child is ill because then they want their parents and anyone can understand that but if it is the CM that is ill then I think it is reasonable to expect you to at least try to make alternative arrangements.

I'm sorry if I am coming across harshly here. I do understand how difficult it is to be a working parent, but your boss is one too and perhaps she had to pick up the work that she was expecting you to do or had to rejuggle everyone elses work and I can see it wouldn't be easy for her.