Give up looking for a new job and try to get pregnanrt instead? Irresponsible?

[hel9a]

I have been unemployed since September and am struggling to get a new job. I am beginning to think that I could use this time to have babies instead.

I am 38, we want to do it soon and maybe this would be a good time to do it because we could survive on benefits, with mortgage holiday and then I could go back to work in a couple of years when the world gets back to normal (my husband would be happy to give up work and take over childcare and I am our main breadwinner when I'm working).

When I was working, I was only entitled to 6 weeks' paid maternity leave so would have been looking at a long period on benefits and with a mortgage holiday anyway. Am I being totally irresponsible?! and would this be career suicide?

I don't think you're irresponsible - it's not like you're getting any younger (sorry )

Sounds like a good time to me and i presume you've been working for the best part of 20 years.

If you don't have any children but want them and you're 38 - have them!

That's what I'm thinking about doing! Am leaving my job (they won't let me work part time!) so may end up TTCing in the summer if I can't find anything else. It would be ideal as would have a just over 2 year age gap between ds and another dc.

On an emotional level - yeah, go for it.

On a practical level, and I don't know what kind of work you're looking for, a career gap to have kids could look better than a career gap of 6-12-18 months unemployed as far as a potential employer is concerned.

One thing - check that your mortgage holiday still applies if you're unemployed. I know that some don't.

Hiya,

Am in a similar position - 38, and being made redundant. I have delayed having a 2nd child due to work loyalty in busy year (pah!). So long as my package is enough, I'm going to take the time out to have a 2nd and like you, look for a job when (hopefully) things are a bit brighter.

I say go for it!

Go for it. Don't want to be rude but time is not on your side if you are 38, just do it.

Agree you coudl use the break to do so but I'm not sure you'd necessarily get the benefits you assume to make up for loss of a salary, it rather depends how much your dp earns and any savings, or qualify for a mortgage holiday. A sahm may well get nothing apart from Child Benefit. SMP is paid for 39 weeks (info here so not sure where your 6 weeks comes from, maybe your company had its own discretionary policy above this to top it up for 6 weeks.

Thank you LIZS - I think you're right. It seems I'm entitled to practically nothing - not because I have any savings but because my husband has a full-time job (even though he earns hardly anything and certainly not enough to cover the mortgage).

Grrrr - looks like we'll be on bread and water if we go ahead with this baby thing...

Could you set yourself up as freelance whilst TTC? You may be able to carve a successful part-time business for yourself working from home if your career lends itself to freelance work. This would also be baby/toddler friendly. This might give you a better work/life balance post-baby, especially if you are not heavily reliant on two big incomes to pay the bills and it also means you can be doing something useful for your career/CV in the meantime.

I know exactly where your coming from. Although not exactly the same situation, I went back to work when my ds was 18 months old. I absolutely loved my job and had no intention of trying for another baby yet. Then they made me change offices to another branch, and I don't like it, so I decided it was time to take time out and have another baby. My son is now 3.3 years and I'm 6 months pregnant, so I'm glad it happened as otherwise the age gap could have been alot wider. I think with employment it sometimes seems a right time to plan your family rather than your career. i'm hoping to get another job when I have to go back, and only work part time imstead of full time. Think it was the kick I needed to change my life for the better.