Should I tell a prospective employer that I'm pregnant?

[Cbynner]

I have a one year old son and have been working part-time. I have now had to resign from my job due to internal politics and I find myself 11 weeks pregnant and in desperate need of another job because I have been providing half of our income. I intend to continue working after the second baby. Should I tell a prospective employer that I'm pregnant before an interview or only if I am offered a job? Part-time jobs are very scarce where I live and I am worried about reducing my chances of finding a job.

Cbynner, a woman started in our company who was pregnant (and knew it) at the time of the interview. She only told the company once she had been given a job. Personnel and her new boss were furious and made it quite clear they though she had betrayed the company and her new team. She stuck to her guns and had a hard time of it.
However, on her return after the baby they found a reason to legally (just) get rid of her. She could have pushed the issue but had other things on her mind (understandably). Being made redundant is miserable even if you have only been with a company a short while, but I think you need to build up good will before having a baby because you will need it on your return i.e. wanting part-time work, days off for child sickness etc. i know the law is on your side, but reality (at least in the field of engineering) is a different matter.

Good luck.

Cbynner, I found myself out of work a few months before I was pregnant with my first son. My wage was needed and I wanted to keep my cv looking full over the next 8 months, so I freelanced. I was able to go to job interviews for freelance work still looking 'normal' to the untrained eye, and because the subsequent work was short term, no employer minded too much as and when I revealed (or rather my stomach did) that I was pregnant, at about five months. I kept on doing freelance work up to two weeks before my due date. After my son was born, freelance work was a gradual stepping stone to getting a full-time job again.

Obviously, freelance work may not be availabe in your particular field, so I know it's not an option for everyone. If you can't freelance,would some form of office temping be a possibility for you in the coming months?

Cbynner,
I once got a job when I knew I was pregnant, and I didn't mention it at interview (not the same as telling lies, they didn't ask!) - I only took 3 months maternity leave, and the company was OK about it. (they didn't have to pay any maternity benefits by law anyway) You could always claim you didn't know at the time of interview if they get annoyed. Has anyone ever admitted they were pregnant and still been offered the job??

How about waiting until you have an official job offer and then telling them you've just found out you're pregnant and offer them a chance to reconsider. If they withdraw the offer I don't think they're a company worth working for. If they stick by their job offer you know that they do respect their employees and also there will be no flack from other colleagues etc.

They legally cannot refuse you a job unless it is because it would be unsuitable eg a heavy job which could harm your baby.

Even if you didn't "need" the job, you have every right to be there. Stick to your guns.

The problem is some women fiddle, like anyone in any system, and those "bad apples" spoil it for the rest of us!

They legally cannot refuse you a job unless it is because it would be unsuitable eg a heavy job which could harm your baby. But it would be silly to apply for that kind of job anyway if you knew you would be putting yourself and baby at risk.

Even if you didn't "need" the job, you have every right to be there. Stick to your guns.

The problem is some women fiddle, like anyone in any system, and those "bad apples" spoil it for the rest of us!

Cbynner - I'd go and get another job as soon as possible and not tell them. I was very much in this position in my last job. I was nearing the end of my contract and was actually 13 weeks pregnant when they renewed it. I deliberately didn't tell them in case they decided not to renew it. They were OK about it but my boss tried to change my finish date so I'd lose out on holiday and maternity pay! I made her change it back pronto. She was a bit cross that I was leaving 3 months earlier than I would have been if I was not pregnant but there was nothing they could do about it. At the end of the day in this day and age of an often uncertain job market you just have to look out for yourself.

You don't even need to tell them you are pregnant till it becomes more obvious - you could always say you didn't know you were as this is quite plausible. I'd try to get a job asap though as you could qualify for maternity pay. Good luck.

Well, I have seen it myself at work eg women telling the boss they are going to go back to work, (when they actually are going to quit for some reason or they have another job lined up) and then they don't go back when the boss could have got someone in their place.

Also, there was a very high profile case of a woman threatening to take a company to court for not giving her a job when she was pregnant getting the job, and then she refused to do the heavy lifting (which was actually the main part of the job, carrying furniture) and so got the sack and sued the man! She shouldn't have gone for that job in the first place. If he hadn't have given her the job, he would have been breaking the law, and yet if he had let her do the job, he would have been breaking health and safety. One woman having no common sense (or maybe she did if for the compensation at the tribunal) makes the rest of us look bad.

Star, I do see where Jbr is coming from. Put yourself in the position of an employer (a female one if you want!). You have advertised a position you need filled. Someone takes that position knowing they will not be able to give more than 6-7 months to it without leaving. Its just not long enough. It takes that long to settle in and go thru' the learning curve. Then the employer has to start looking for a new recruit to cover her,and do a handover almost straight away. And as Jbr pointed out, that person doesn't have to return either.

Well lots of reasons. But she certainly might want to return part-time. And as she has a right to do that, its not very easy on the employer is it. It does spoil it for the rest of us who try to put in to an employer before taking out.

When up against it, do you put your principals over your practical needs? Lets say Cybnner considers all other routes -temporary, freelance,setting up her own business,part-time work, work in another field, and so on, declares she is pregnant in a few interviews, still fails to get a job, then can you expect her to say ' no I can't put food on the table because it would mean muddying the water for my fellow women workers?'

However, Lil, I agree that you have to put in before you take out. Where I work, I have to show lots of commitment in order for my employers to be happy about me using my legal right to unpaid leave for dependents if my children are ill.

Another thought, lots of non-pregnant people apply for permanant posts knowing that they are only going to be there for a limited time - or until something better comes along. Surely for employers that's a fact of life?

To tell them or not is up to you, but if it was me, it would depend on what the job was. If it was going to be a long term one, then I might but if it was a short term, I might not go for that anyway. But then I didn't take much time off during (except when I was ill) and only stayed off after for 2 weeks, because I didn't feel ill at all. I thought it was going to be terrible after but it wasn't I am glad to say. I didn't think I needed any more time off than a man would unless I was ill, which I wasn't!

Cbynner, I think it is probably best to be upfront, once you have been offered the job. Regardless of how badly you need the job it would be really horrible to have to work in an atmosphere of bad feeling for the next 5 or 6 months. Not all employers will be shitty. Our team secretary was 6 weeks pregnant when she started working for us. She didn't tell me when she joined the company as she was still in a state of shock/denial (it was unplanned) but I have no problem with it. She is a great secretary and plans to return to work after her maternity leave, so I will just get maternity cover while she is off. It really is not a big problem.
How about looking for maternity cover jobs yourself? They won't mind if you are pregnant because the job has a finite length anyway.
Good luck!

OK here's my situation.

I was made redundant last October. Got pregnant in January. Got a new job 2 weeks ago. I am now 15 weeks pregnant and my employers don't know. My reasons for not telling them were/are:

1. they don't have to know; 2)when I was offered the job the pregnancy hadn't been officially confirmed (through scan);
2. they didn't actually give me a proper contract until I'd been in the job for over a week so didn't want to give them any reason for not issuing one.

My new employers are the local authority so obviously they will have to tread very carefully when I do tell them. I am now wondering when to break the news. I have a 20 week scan booked at the end of May and am thinking maybe I ought to do it before then. I don't know. What do you all think? I am definitely of the opinion that I want them to see how useful I am at work before I go upsetting the apple cart but one thing I know I won't be able to stand is that they will think I've let the team down. Sigh! Nothing works the way you want it to does it?

Debster, no practical experience but a few thoughts.

You will be entitled to time off for ante-natal appointments once you admit you're pregnant, so I think you probably do need to tell them before the scan at the end of May so that you can take that time. Lots of people don't tell anyone they're pregnant for ages so I don't think that's exceptional.

I think in your postion I would go for the brazen approach: get a meeting with your line manager, begin it with a huge smile and tell them you're very happy to announce that you're pregnant!! You could either be barefaced and say that you've only just found out or you could just let them think that by omission, but you should present it as a lovely happy piece of news - which of course, it is You don't have to answer any questions about whether you were trying, that is your business and no-one elses. They should know better than to ask!

If you are planning to return to work you could tell your employer that you are intending to return and that you will work up until week xxx of your pregnancy. They will know that they are not allowed to discriminate against you because you are pregnant and therefore shouldn't treat your news in any way other than with polite professionalism. Carry on as you were and prove your worth.

I WISH we lived in a world where it was accepted that women are entitled to work and have children and get pregnant, all at the same time. Where your kind of dilemma didn't have to be considered. For goodness sake, what does industry think would happen to the economy and society if women didn't have children? Grrrrrrrr

Good luck.

Cbynner and Debster, When I became pregnant I had already accepted a job which started in 6 months'time. I was terrified that they would hear I was pregnant and suddenly say that after all they did not have a job available for me, whatever the correct legal position. I did not tell anyone (apart from close family) that I was pregnant until after the 20 week scan. Then I wrote and said that I was happy to be pregnant, I had not wanted to inform people until the risk of miscarrying was over, but I had had the scan and was happy now, and I was very keen to work as long as I could, and to return once the baby was born. They were very shocked and certain managers put pressure on me not to start the job at all, but to take a year's unpaid leave - which I could no way afford. Other people were very supportive though. If you do intend to continue working afterwards, just make heavy weather of it, and that you have had one child already and returned to work. Once you have actually got a job, they will have a greater interest in retaining you and being kind to you during your pregnancy and maternity leave. In an ideal world, I think you should say at interview that you are pregnant, but in the real world, I bet you won't get a job if you do.