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Original poster

What happens if you have a relationship with your boss? Can you lose your job, can they sack you?

9 replies

LoveMyGirls · 27/12/2008 11:39

What happens if you resign would your boss lose his job anyway?

Just wondering as someone I know wants a long term relationship with their boss but is worried about the repercussions, I think it shouldn't matter as long as it doesn't interfer with your work.

If they sack either of them can they take them to a tribunal?

What are the legal repercussions of this?

TIA

OP posts:

pantomimEDAMe · 27/12/2008 12:07

Depends on their contract of employment but yes, people do get the sack for workplace relationships. Even before you get to that point, it can get very messy, with your colleagues gossiping and assuming you are getting preferential treatment. Best avoided IMO.

What do you mean, btw, 'long term relationship'? Are they in a relationship already?

pantomimEDAMe · 27/12/2008 12:08

Oh, and it's usually the more junior employee who suffers - boss sits tight while junior gets the sack.

AMIStletoekiss · 27/12/2008 12:29

Assuming it's a relationship where they are both single, they should speak to either the next level of management up or the HR department to get proper advice. Far, far trickier if either of them is not "free", as that's much more likely to cause problems, and most companies won't be happy for them to be in an illicit relationship. Many companies have rules about this, and would move one of them (the junior almost certainly!) into another department.

Original poster

LoveMyGirls · 27/12/2008 12:32

It's all been very complicated for a very long time and now it's got to a point where they say they're in love and the boss wants her to leave her job so they can be together properly out in the open at last.

I'm worried about the whole relationship tbh but I can't interfer in matters of the heart, she needs to make up her own mind about what she wants to do.

I thought the stories from the boss about it being complicated because of work etc were a bit far fetched tbh and wondered if he was spinning her a line.

This has been bubbling under the surface for a couple of years.

Her head is telling her to run for the hills but her heart says she loves him and can't stop thinking about him.

I think to give up everything in her life to be with him is risky but incase it's what she decides she wants I wanted to have the full facts so I can support her, whatever she does is going to be hard.

Either way I think finding another job wouldn't be a bad idea BUT jobs are not easy to come by at the moment and she's worked hard and is good at what she does, why should she lose her job just to be with the guy she loves, seems very unfair.

OP posts:

pantomimEDAMe · 27/12/2008 12:36

It is unfair but there's no justice in this kind of thing. If her boss truly loves her, why isn't he looking for a new job, huh?

AMumInScotland · 27/12/2008 12:43

I would advise her to speak to HR about it, if they have any, because that way she can get proper advice. It can be complicated to work with someone you're in a relationship with, but people do manage it, specially if they are open about the relationship and arrange things so that she isn't reporting directly to him. At my work we have at least 3 couples, and they manage fine - but none of them is the boss of the other.

It would be a really bad time for her to leave a stable job and look for something else - even if she fins something just as good, if things get tricky it's often "last in first out" so she'll have less security.

Original poster

LoveMyGirls · 27/12/2008 18:30

Agree, why is it her that would have to leave her job but I'm guessing his answer would be because he earns the most so could support them both if she can't find a job.

OP posts:

nkf · 27/12/2008 18:33

If there is no spouses involved, I think colleagues and management should be able to handle it. People meet at work all the time. I'm assuming (wrongly perhaps) that one or the other is married. It looks bad. Personally, if it's a good job, I think that's worth more than the man especially as her head is telling her to run for the hills.

AMumInScotland · 27/12/2008 18:37

If her head is sending warning signals, she should definitely avoid being reliant on him - love is nice, but unless she can really trust him with her head as well as her heart, then love is not a good basis for making practical decisions. But she may not want good advice - often people want to be so overwhelmingly in love that the world doesn't matter, and are quite prepared to ignore anything which doesn't fit that scenario as "unromantic" and therefore to be ignored... You may well end up just having to be there for her when it all goes pear-shaped.

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