Friend claims to be in the 3rd job running where she is being bullied.

[sameagain]

From what she says, she has undoubtedly come up against some people who have wanted to make life pretty uncomfortable for her, but as this is now 3 jobs in a row, I can't help thinking maybe it has something to do with her?

Examples are that "even 5 mins late is a big drama" well she's only been in the job a few months, I've only been late for work twice in 20 years, so perhaps they have a point.

"can't take a minute longer than an hour for lunch" well, bearing in mind your colleagues have to cover for you...

And heaven forbid, if anyone suggests she should stay after 5pm!

She gets herself into a real state over it, to the extent that she left the last job practically on doctor's orders, but she says this one is worse.

How can I explain gently, that a lot of what she complains about seems normal to me, that her colleagues are entitled to be a bit put out if she takes the p**s and that her boss (company owner) is entitled to expect her to earn her salary?

What you describe about what you're doing/want to do is not bullying but some of her colleagues being 'put out' about her behaviour may mean that they are being rude to her/bullying her.

Her boss should definitely be saying exactly what you said in your last sentence.

'You contracted for those times, now do them'.

I've met loads of people like this as well, they just don't like being told what to do - and when gently told think they are being 'picked on'

You are so right, it is so about her.

Yes it is. I do think she's had some pretty rough treatment, but can easily imagine that her workmates think she deserves it for not pulling her weight.

Unfortunately, she's daddy little girl and he runs his own business, so she thinks all bosses should be like when she worked for him. Strangely though, he doesn't seem too keen to have her work for him either!(her mum and brother do)

How about asking what she would expect if she were the boss? Would she put up with people not doing the basics like turning up on time? Or even how would she feel if it was her collegues who were behaving like this to her?

i think your last sentence is fine.. a job is something you are paid to do, and being late a lot, and taking longer lunch hours frequently is not acceptable

clearly has an issue with not being able to do as she pleases,which is a bit of a pisser if you are an employee..

especially if she whinges to teh colleagues she expects to cover her lateness

Exactly what you said in your last line of your original post. Say that!

I come across lots of people where, if the employer tries to say that it's "another example of the bullying in this company." I often wish that a friend or family member (i.e. someone they trust) would tell them the truth. It would do them a favour in the long run!