Help!

[FedupTA14]

I've been covering as a pastoral lead in a primary school that I work in as a Midday Supervisor, for the past few months. The Head Teacher asked if I would help out as the Pastoral Lead went of sick and lef. I'm a level 3 TA but always been in the classroom not the nurture/pastoral side. Anyway, I've jumped in with both feet and absolutely loved it. I've had praise from SLT and other staff. I've built up positive relationships with the children. I've been working at home in the evening, spending time researching interventions etc.
Anyway the school advertised the role, I applied and got an interview. Unfortunately, I wasn't successful - it went to an outsider with more experience etc. The Head is lovely and she has offered me a TA role that will be a mixture of classroom support and nurture. At first I was ok and understood them taking on someone with more experience and a counselling degree, but the past two days I've had a bit of an epiphany and thought I've been good enough to cover the role, to work in my own time, to 'train' myself on things like Lego and Art Therapy, been willing and eager to get some additional training and to learn, and been paid basic rate, all while running interventions, picking up most behaviours. And come September I'll be pushed to the side.
I have never enjoyed the classroom support of being a TA, I find it boring, and one reason I said I wouldn't go back to being a TA. I've always thrived helping other in a nurture/pastoral way, and covering this role has cemented that.
I had the interview a week and half ago. I don't know what's suddenly made me feel this way, but I needed to get out how I'm feeling.

It's understandable to feel like this, but unfortunately the more you give in these types of jobs, the more the employer will take.

Im SLT (secondary tho) and line manage more than a dozen similar pastoral roles.

Firstly, what you could do is take this as incentive to apply elsewhere for similar roles.

Or, if you're staying at your school, all is not lost. You have been noticed. They are already looking at how they can utilise your skills, which shows you have been noticed.

It raises your profile for other pastoral jobs that arise. Your problem is that pastoral roles in primaries are few and far between. In secondary, esp big secondaries, there are lots of these roles: safeguarding officer, wellbeing support, ELSA or EBSA support, behaviour mentor, attendance officer, education welfare officer, inclusion officer....

That's very true. The thing with me is that I like to give my all for the children. It just sucks when you've been good enough and continue to be but they push you a side for someone else.

Thank you, this is really helpful and actually makes me feel less disheartened. I'm going to be looking at relevant training courses as well.

I feel like you should have a look at job profiles and really think about what you want to do next, choose a career and go for it, you sound like you have a lot to offer and these days employers are cheeky and demand graduate qualifications for what used to be entry level jobs. Don't feel you have to accept what's on offer there, you've got options you could go to another school or do a new course - you mentioned art therapy, what a great profession that could be for you - whatever you choose, have faith in yourself and good luck x

Thank you so much. It's definitely made me realize how much I want to progress in a pastoral/nurture role.

You sound amazing and passionate about supporting children. I really hope you find your nook soon and thrive in it. The children will be lucky to have you

This is really kind, thank you.