Team member sulking - any suggestions?

[Blushingm]

I am a team leader and have 2 deputy positions vacant. Another 2 teams have 1 each so we advertised together. We short listed and one if my team members applied but wasn’t short listed

Shes now sulking. Not speaking to me. Not speaking to a team member who got an interview and is just making an atmosphere in the office. Even the students are picking up on it.

I found out she went to my senior to ask for a transfer - Or when the next deputy job is coming up. My senior is great and agreed that it’s good she wasn’t short listed if this is her attitude

i called her to my office to say we need to clear the air - the decision stands - I understand she’s disappointed but it’s not fair on the rest of the team - it’s disrespectful and disruptive.

I asked what she wanted me to do - her reply was nothing. I explained it wasn’t personal but other people were more experience etc - her reply - ‘well some might think differently’

now I’m really pissed off - she’s rude. Disruptive. Disrespectful. And not sure what my next step should be……I’m relatively new to team leader

Presumably there were more people from other teams on the shortlisting panel? You could ask one of them to give her feedback? so it doesn’t come from you and she can note that the panel were unanimous in their decisions etc.

otherwise I’d let her transfer if she can, she sounds like someone you don’t want on your team.

Yes - there were 3 managers who short listed. She was offered feedback in the email response and I offered it again when she came in on Monday (after she blanked me when she came in)

but yes - I don’t want her in my team with the attitude she’s having

I think she’s not far off being given a warning tbh

This!
I would be pissed of too, you tried to handle this nicely, but her attitude is crossing the line. Since she shut down your chat, start writing down everything she says and does so you have a paper trail. I would be tempted to call her in for a formal meeting (possibly with HR) and focus strictly on her behaviour, not her hurt feelings. Tell her straight out that freezing people out and ruining the office vibe, especially around students has to stop now.

I had a similar thing happen to me, the difference being I was able to prove that my manager had a biased attitude for short listing. I transferred to a secondment shortly afterwards. I think in your case you'll need to sit down with her and another manager and get it in writing what the issue is, she can't sulk like a teenager 'just because' and if she believes she has a case then there are proper hr channels for raising these things, not stropping around. This needs to be clearly outlined to her and your process followed, otherwise it's going to get ridiculous

The behaviour your describing is a conduct issue. Arrange a formal meeting to discuss expectations of behaviour.

Escalate to disciplinary if necessary. Nip it in the bud.

I’m very pissed off - I’ve tried being understanding but you’re right. She’s crossing the line.

I write down all discussion I have with staff so I can have a record so I don’t forget bits

I have a 1:1 with my senior next week but I may discuss it with her tomorrow

Was she given opportunities for development that would have helped her to move into a more senior role before this?

Do you have an HR team. If so, speak to them, failing which your line manager.

Where I work there are policies that cover this kind of thing which enables the employer to warn then move to a more formal procedure.

Some employees in this situation will find it difficult to deal with and some HR teams are skilled at getting them to pause and stop that negative response which isn't good for the individual or the business.

Absolutely - but there were other applicants that had more experience, better personal statements and also had additional qualifications that were asked for that she doesn’t have.

13 applied and 7 were short listed so she wasn’t the only one to miss out

I’m in HR. There are 2 ways to play this: the way you have, or the way where internal candidates get an interview (unless their application was completely off the mark) to give them a change to get interview experience and more detailed feedback.

In other words, if she demonstrated she met the essential criteria I’d have interviewed her. The others might have bells and whistles but this was a missed development opportunity for her and a chance to give some development for you.

She didn't meet essential criteria, she doesn't have the additional qualifications.

They were all internal candidates as it’s a secondment

The OP doesn't say that she didn't meet all essential criteria - the additional qualifications might have been desirable.

Thanks for clarifying that.

How long ago did she find out that she wasn't shortlisted?

Hmm okay I am going to go against the tide.

Her behaviour is appalling BUT you sound inexperienced in the way you give feedback based on what you have written here.

This is someone applying for an internal promotion right? And you emailed them a rejection saying they could have feedback if they wanted?

Imo that's poor. I give people bad news a lot in my job. I would have called her in face to face to deliver the rejection but also have gone armed to that meeting with clear inarguable reasons why she didn't get SL, and with 1-2 things I could do to help her.

Such as, putting in a mentor, advising her of how to access qualifications that would help, offer for another panel member to go through her app and deliver detailed feedback later.

I'll say again her behaviour is very bad, but from her side, it may look like,

I applied for an internal job and some people close to the team lead were shortlisted and I wasn't. They didn't even give a proper reason or talk to me, just sent a short rejection email and said I could ask for feedback. I passed the team lead later and was so upset I could barely look her in the eye.

Even more so then, I get that she's disappointed etc, but as it was all internal it's literally other people were better. She can ask for the shortlisting criteria and how it was scored if she genuinely believes it wasn't carried out fairly, but doing what she's doing is a fast way to put yourself on a disciplinary, and like another poster has said, needs nipping in the bud quickly.

I agree.

She can be disappointed. But on her own time. If she refuses to speak with her team leader and colleagues, she is falling short on her professional obligations.

I'd take this to HR and ask their advice. Log all instances of her unprofessional behaviour for future reference.

As a manager myself I think you made a mistake of not at least giving her the chance to interview.

The external people might look better on paper but your team member already has the knowledge of the organisation and has shown commitment to her job and it is not unreasonable for people to want to progress.

Frankly, I would pissed off too if I was in her situation.

You also seem to lack basic empathy towards your colleague who is disappointed and probably saw not even being shortlisted as a real slap in the face.

'I asked what she wanted me to do'

Well, as her manager YOU should be able to tell her what she has to improve to be able to progress in the organisation, not just tell her to suck it up.

I think you handled this really poorly too.

I agree with this - I would deliver this news in person and offer further support etc. I would also ignore the advice to go to HR or formalise anything at this stage - unless it's been going on for weeks?

You cannot interview every person that applies. You screen and interview the ones at the top and if you don't find anyone suitable you go to the next few. Or you then go externally.

I think a feedback interview on why she wasn’t shortlisted would be helpful. Were the qualifications the others have job related or general - a degree? Were they essential or not. Can she be allowed to get the qualifications because, if not, she’s permanently stuck isn’t she. I think the handling of this is a bit insensitive and you should not ask for nice to have qualifications (if you did) and then use them as a tie breaker. How is she supposed to get promotion?

By not sulking, accepting the feedback discussion and coming up with a plan to get the interview/job next time, like we all did in that situation.

Op has confirmed that all the applicants were internal. Depending on company process, it's not unusual to receive a rejection email from HR and nothing from your team manager (in my case I'd had 4 meetings with my manager before even putting in the application but she didn't shortlist me and I then asked for the shortlisting process which showed she'd given me ridiculously low scores on the essential criteria when I'd been with that team 8 years and my application was extremely strong)
Some organisations just don't require team managers to do much more than follow up with the unsuccessful candidates. Unfortunately she's taken it very badly and it's now up to HR to unpick the mess.