I've been working for 40 years and I'm so sick of the drudgery!

[ThePandoricaAwakes]

I left school at 16 and went straight into an apprenticeship, and apart from a 9-month break when my son was born 15 years ago, I’ve worked continuously ever since. Lately though, I just feel exhausted, stuck in a rut, and completely fed up with the daily grind. Every day feels exactly the same.
I work from home, so most days my only company is the cats and dogs, which can feel pretty isolating at times. But at the same time, I’m at an age where I don’t really want the upheaval of starting a new job or career.
Even weekends don’t feel enjoyable anymore. My son rarely wants to leave the house before midday, my husband just wants to sit on his arse, we can’t leave the dog for too long, and we usually end up just pottering around without really doing anything fun or different.
What really gets me down is knowing I’ve still got at least another 13 years before retirement. It feels such a long way off, and I worry I won’t even be healthy enough to properly enjoy it by then.
Feeling a bit maudlin today, I suppose, but I can’t help thinking sometimes that I wish I’d chosen a different career path, and, if I’m being completely honest, maybe even a different partner too.

Do you know how your pension pots are doing? It might be worth looking to see if you can start taking them so you could reduce to part time. If you do that, you can plan things to do on your days off - with or without DH.

Sympathy @ThePandoricaAwakes . I'm older than you and feel like this too sometimes. What's stopping you from pursuing your own hobbies and interests at the weekend or in the evenings? That might be a way to feel more invigorated and fulfilled?

What is one person's grind can be another person's joy but it does appear you have a case of "the glums" and maybe a change of scene or routine would give you a lift?
As for the partner situation can't help with that one I'm afraid.☹️
As PP said, have you checked your pension(s) to see what it is worth and whether finishing early is a realistic option?

Like you, I went straight into work at 16 and while I would not say I "loved" my work, it was interesting, engaging, fulfilling, at times very stretching and I was never bored. The commute on the other hand was a pain and a recent office move made it more unappealing.
When we started WFH it was a real game changer and I never wanted to go back into the office again, Ddog loved having me at home and would often come and sit with me at my desk. I could mooch around the garden in my tea break and at lunchtime I took Ddog out for a wander in the woods which really took my mind off work (when in the office, my lunchtime walk was around town or a small park, both of which were very unappealing☹️).

When work insisted on a phased return to the office I could see the writing on the wall and having crunched the numbers, I took advantage of a early leavers package and left at 57 which was the best thing I ever did.

@WhatATimeToBeAlive it looks at the moment that I'm on track for around 35k per year and I'm currently earning 41k, so I'll hopefully be ok, but not sure I'd afford to drop my hours as I would like to try and add more to the pot. @MargoLivebetter it sucks doesn't it. I do have hobbies - I'm quite creative, but everything is so expensive to buy. I also feel like I need to get out of the house after being stuck in all week. Not interested in anything sporty as I find it really boring 😕

What’s your pension situation?

What’s your job OP? Or sector? Is it possible to go 4 days a week? Use the day just for you. Build your own life and fun. 40 years is a long time to work consecutively. Sounds like you just need a break. Sorry I’m not sure what the answer is. I think really looking at your weekends and seeing where you can build some joy in without the husband and no doubt teenager.

In your shoes, I’d take myself on a two week all inclusive holiday. On my own.
I’d also randomly and spontaneously do a city break, again, on my own.

Join a book club, that’ll get you out of the house and suitably tipsy once a month.

I have a group of friends met through dog walking, we get together once a month for a game of cards.

Also, HRT did wonders for my mood.
HTH

This was me 18 months ago. I’m 57 and had worked full time without a break for 35 years.

You have a great pension. What’s your housing/mortgage situation? Given how good your pension is, and your acknowledgement that you might not even get to enjoy it, I’d start to prioritise the now and cut my hours. I changed jobs (sideways move) from 5 days to 3 and it was a game changer. Money is tight (I’ve also already done the hard work, pension-wise) but my quality of life has improved immeasurably and I am a much better employee too, feeling like I’m thriving rather than grinding it out for the first time in years.

You sound a bit depressed and isolated. I would strongly consider planning to drop to 4 days, provided you can come up with something purposeful, structured and ideally active or creative, that gets you out of the house and at least briefly connecting with people.

-An allotment?
-Outdoor volunteering of some kind - British Trust for Conservation volunteers, or a guerilla gardening group?
Volunteering for the Cinnamon Trust or an animal shelter, something you can take your dog to?

Why not go on a solo holiday or trip and leave your dull family behind?

I think I am a bit depressed tbh. I started HRT at 50 and was told at the end of last year that I had to stop it due to the risk of breast cancer, so I've been struggling with my health a bit. Started to take some natural supplements but the Dr told me to stop due to interactions with a medication I'm taking, so that's a bit shit! Would love to take myself off somewhere but am full of anxiety and even struggle to drive! I work in creative role within local government, it's a bit of an unusual role, so we are always ridiculously busy and I find even though I wfh I sit down at 8 to work and don't get up until I finish at 5! I think I might feel I'm letting them down a bit by dropping a day, but they are very flexible, so it might be worth me mentioning it. I also think DH would think I'm 'slacking' if I did! I'm very lucky in the fact that we are mortgage free and there's the possibility of selling up if things get tight.

You need to get over the anxiety and learn to do things on your own: a class, a trip, a book club rather than relying on your family for joy.

Nothing will change if nothing changes.

‘Dh would think I was slacking ‘

a) deciding your partner would disapprove of something you haven’t even mentioned yet is classically depressed thinking b) suggest you both go to 4 days c) so what?

As for your team, yes it can feel like a big drop. Sadly, you may find after the first week or two that they barely notice…

It doesn't sound like your job is the problem. It sounds like your life outside of work is lacking something. I wonder if dropping a day at work might actually amplify that, if you've got another day of the week to fill without plans? It's not even a bad thing really, just something to be prepared for.

You don't mention friends or hobbies. What do you want to do with your time if you're not with husband or son? Who else would you like to spend time with? If my husband and kids didn't want to get up and go out somewhere with me at the weekend, I would go and do something by myself or with a friend.